h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Welcome all who enter my cabin...allow me to describe it to you.

The bunk is made impeccabley with crisp white sheets, a lightsabre hangs on a hooks along with a cloak, several jedi robes and third technician uniforms are hung up in the wardrobe.
An unopened curry container is in the microwave and a book 'How to kiss-ass to your superior' is open on my desk.

Have a
And May the Force, Farce and Schwarz be with you

*walks in*
Hmmm... Nice looking cabin.
*looks at desk*
Hey, what do you know, I have the same book!

*Putting into action technique #7*

Of course you do, sir. I only got it because my role model, that's you, sir, had it too.

Not a bad cabin, but u forgot the life supply of vindaloos and larger on tap.

Do not dare question the goodness of my cabin, it is perfect

so which do we use? The Force, The Farse or The Schwarts? Sorry Master Luthiena I did not mean to say your cabin was not perfect

Sorry Luthiena,

Are you saying I'm not a true Jedi by trying to say your cabin is of a true Jedi?

Or are you just dissing me cos I is Scottish?

You should be proud to be Scottish, there's nothing wrong with Scotland. It's given us great actors (Ewan McGregor) and singers (Wet Wet Wet). You wear that kilt and don't take any notice of what my other half my think, she's got a few screws lose.

Lots of screws loose, you are indeedy a true jedi, i feel your force oh scottish one, be welcome!