h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I was led to believe that these people were actually supposed to try & help us.

After waiting more than 3months, I finally got an appointment with a psychologist & went along today. I really didn't know what to expect, but I was willing to give it a go.

I know I'm living in France. I realise my French should be better. I also know full well that this guy can understand & speaks fluent English. It is difficult enough to explain the painful subtleties of stuff you don't really understand yourself in your own language.

The only compromise he would make was to allow me to speak in English, while he mumbled a reply (occasionally, when I begged him to respond) from behind his hand in French.

Eventually, he said something, which I managed to translate. I had told him that I had, with the help of all of you on here, been able to do a certain amount of "self-help" & would value his comments.

His answer was "Are you living on the internet or are you living in France?"

The answer to my problems, as far as I can tell in his opinion, is that I should leave France, unless I become fluent overnight.

Perhaps he's right.

My bloody fault, yet again.

I have to say, I feel far, far worse now than I have for months.

I just feel this was some kind of test, which I seem to have failed, not any sort of help or attempt to heal.

Oh well.

?Terri.

For those of us who are out of the loop a bit, but want to be supportive anyway.... Why are you in France?

And I'm sorry you had such a bad experience with that loser... They're not all like that, but it *is* hard to find (and get in with) someone who can actually work well with you.

*sigh*
Mikey

Hi Terri, I've had a bad experince with a sexual therapist, who said my sexual fears were nothing to do with the incest.

A psychologist who was most interested in my masturbation techniques then in helping me.

Another psychologist who saw me for 3 sessions before mentioning a whole new list of rules which I really think she should have said at the begining.

Its wrong for me to say this here, but don't waste your money on them. They can screw you up as much as the reason you went there in the first place. That is my honest belief. The session with the sexual therapist was actually a full hour of insults from her, I can tell you more if you need more proof not to bother with these people.

Its definately not you, its them

Hi kaz, thanks, I feel like this is the first time today somebody has realised how I might feel in all this.

At least I'm not wasting my money. I havent got any !! None, I don't just mean "oh, i'm a bit hard up", my main bloody psycho prob at the moment is that in order to exist for the next 10days, I have to either grovel & beg & generally be financially & emotionally dependent on someone who, believe me, I cannot afford to be

or

beg or busk on the streets.

--unless some sort of miracle happens.

IF said miracle occurs, it will be that despite the fact that France is grinding to a halt due to strikes, somehow my Social Security payment, based on physical handicap, has finally come through.

Once it arrives , I will be fine, it is enough to live on, which can't be said for UK. So, that is one reason I am in France. There really is no good reason to go back to UK, I have no family & after being abroad for 25 years, most of my friends are either dead or inhabiting such different worlds that we no longer connect on any level.I came to France in the first place because the only work I could get in UK was cleaning "you're too old, you've been abroad too much." (I am a qualified teacher, amongst other things)

I just feel like the main point that was being made was "why the hell should we support you?"

The fact that French citizens too, can have problems & get help in UK, seems not to be relevant. I am beginning to sound racist, xenophobic etc; this is absolutely far from the case, but I do wonder just what the hell I do now. Pack my bags? And go where? What a shame I was careless enough to"lose" my family & didn't get it together to breed a few replacements to look after me now!

tut tut!

Terri

ps: anyone with any sensible, legal, morally defensible ideas on how to survive for 10 days on no money, please, please, let me know. I am not joking. The sense of humour is a casualty I'm afraid.

It's not you Terri.
That is a poor example of a Therapists
Do you have the option of asking for another Therapists?

It's not you Terri.
That is a poor example of a Therapists
Do you have the option of asking for another Therapists?

It's not you Terri.
That is a poor example of a Therapists
Do you have the option of asking for another Therapists?

Hi Terri, I agree it is most definitely NOT you. I've had the same sort of problems with the few therapists I have seen. I've been told that my problems are all of my own doing and that I ought to "snap out of it", I've paid good money to be told to go to the library and read self-help books if I want to get my head straight, and the list goes on. I suppose there are some who truly do want to help, but most of them seem like they're just out to get your money, and the more they can mess with your head, the more you'll come back and the more you'll have to pay. I'm doing much better with the support of friends here, and itoesn't come with a price tag.

As far as existing for 10 days with no money, I've done it before and honestly am shocked that I did. I remember living off canned dog food for a couple of weeks back in the early 90s, it was all I could afford. I don't recommend it, though, it might be high in protein but it takes like crap. I haven't got much but I wish I could help you out and not see you in dire straits. I've just got no idea what things are like in France, the cost of living and all that.

I lived on government cheese and popcorn in school for months.

It kept me going. Better than dog food sad PCandy.

Are there any churchs or Government food banks Terri? A kitchen anywhere you can hang out for leftovers? Did that too, with friends work places.

An egg a day works.
Can you borrow enough change for eggs?
Would be bad if no food bank has eggs or cheese or rice and bread. That is worse than here! They take a tiny piece of your pride ,usually nothing elsea church sermon at the worst.

We've got those neighborhood food pantries here, too. Eggs and cheese can keep one going for days. God, I remember going into fast-food restaurants and stealing ketchup and relish packets and eating those at times, too. It really sucks being totally destitute.

I hope that you'll be okay, Terri, I'll be thinking of you and praying you'll get a break soon. I've sent you an e-mail, too. Hope to hear back from you soon.

It is the ultimate rejection when even your shrink basically sats "its all your fault, go away"

In other words im not worth helping. Ive tried & tried doing the right thing, it hasnt worked. Not having any money means im forced to beg for it off someone who hasnt got it either & will mean this screws up too, to the extent im now labelled "boring", this is a new one. This shrinks litle experiment has failed, i hope it makes him happy, cos im certainly not.

no i dont have the option of another on, i dont have any bloody optionds at all

it occurs to me that any of us on this thread have had this all the wy down the line, perhaps we should just believe it

and , no, i wont eat dog food, you have to buy it & yoda is going to suffer too, i suppose i shouldt have dragged her into this either

The only thing I can think of is asking some neighbours for food in return for housework. Is that bearable or feasible?

Stop thinking about the therapist, he is in that position of power cause he gets off on ordering people and making them feel inadequate. Don't be sucked into his fantasy.

Good luck with your situation

Don't worry about Yoda, from what you have said in the past she can live on birds! Maybe you could roast one?!

I agree with Kaz,although easier said than done
BADMan!
"Stop thinking about the therapist. Don't be sucked into his fantasy."

Done the pychologist/social worker scene. The vast majority of those I have worked with didn't do diddly. Only have found one who really cared. Obviously the one you went to fell into the vast majority (sigh).

In the states, we have soup kitchens and food pantries. Not sure what, if any, France offers. Many religious organizations can help out short term and most churches/synagogue have emergency funds that are availible. It's not much, but it will keep you and Yoda eating. (Have been down to the point whether I feed myself or my pets...they ate, I didn't.)

Don't be too proud to ask friends for help. (easier said then done

OK I know money is a touchy subject. I'm not rolling in it, but I have some to spare. I'm not in dire straits. Couldn't some of us together contribute something and get it sent to Terri some way?

Hi Willem!

I've actually been avoiding replying to the people who have offered to help, in the (apparently vain) hope that something will turn up. but it hasn't. I've scraped by this week by combining forces with who is also totally broke; but this has massive disadvantages for my state of mind & now he has exhausted all the people on his "victims" list; so we really are up the proverbial creek sans paddle.

The problems in practical terms are: the only way cash could actually be sent is by Western Union, which is instant & can be picked up from the post office BUT they charge the sender a bloody fortune & so it is not worth sending a small amount.

i have been seriously wondering whether we could, between us, somehow set up some sort of "Emergency Survivors Fund" into which anyone who wanted could pay in any amount, anonymously, as & when they could manage & out of which could be taken funds for just this sort of awful situation. It would need better financial brains than me to work it all out; obviously there would have to be massive safeguards for all involved & it is basically setting up a charity, which is a pretty heavy thing to do. But, it really does seem the ultimate cruelty that people like us, who have spent most of our bloody lives battling, fighting, crying, screaming, trying, over & over & over should be defeated just by the bloody stuff they call money;

i cant see to write more;

thanks for caring

love

t

I have extremely little knowledge of financial matters ... I don't have a clue as to getting money sent to someone overseas, or setting up a fund ...

At any rate if I could do so easily I would right now give you R200 ... in South Africa this is enough to get most people through two months but the problem is our money is not worth much in terms of the currencies of other countries.