I Couldn't Care Less: Not the Only One
Created | Updated Dec 29, 2013
Not the Only One
Last week was a bit bleak wasn't it? Sorry about that. I know it was the last one before Christmasm but I try only to view the world through the eyes of a carer and report back what I see. Sadly, I can't help when I see it. This this week, mercifully, I see a tale of selflessness and joy, and, as it happens, a salutary lesson for carers. On we go.
It was about 9ish on a Sunday morning. My lie-in day. I was sort of half awake when the noise started. I didn't really recognise it, but my wife (who was already up) came into the room and announced that it was the fire alarm. Then she was off again. As I pulled some clothes on, she informed me that she had all the animals into the front room as per our plan and then headed out of the front door to find out what was happening in the hallway. I went to fetch our fire extinguisher and followed her out. She was already back, wanting a torch, which she got. She dashed off again and I lumbered after her with the fire extinguisher. I still had no real idea what was going on, but that made no difference, she had everything pretty much in hand.
What it boiled (what an apt choice of words, as you will see) down to is this: One of the water tanks had overflowed for reasons too boring to explain, and had flooded its contents through the ceiling of the flat below us, by way of the extractor fan in the bathroom. The fan is, of course, electric. By the time I got there my wife had switched off the electrics in flat two and was supervising switching off all the mains water supplies in the hall. At some point during the day, she must have switched off the electrics in flat one, as well, because both flats came tentatively knocking on our door to ask if she could show them how to turn it back on again. In the absence of a managing agent to call on or a plumber who wasn't too hung over to visit, she pretty much supervised everything for the next few hours. We found the offending tank and the pipe that wasn't connected, we put a bucket under the hole and then prevailed upon flat one to turn their water back off after the fire alarm went off again. We spent much of the remains of day trying to persuade them not to turn it on again. Periodically, there would be a knock at the door and my wife would be called upon again, to turn something back on, or not turn it on, or explain something to somebody. In due course she turned the power back on in flat two, only to find that the sockets weren't working. Animals uppermost in her mind, she supervised the removal of the fish tank as all of their support equipment was without power.
By about 5 she was shattered. She's asthmatic as well as having musculo-skeletal problems1 so running up and down stairs all the time, as well as walking into a steam/smoke filled room, had done her no good. Of course the pressure of everyone else expecting her to know what to do all the time was quite tough. She'd used her regular inhaler and her emergency inhaler and it took us a bit of time to get her breathing settled. So she was asleep by the end of the evening, and I was ready to repel any further invaders seeking her advice. She's tired now, thanks, and she needs sleep. It was a very tough day for her. But it was also a timely reminder for me. It's dangerously easy to allow caring to skew the balance of your relationship, whatever the nature of that relationship. I draw great confidence from knowing that I can, when called upon, sometimes do great things and make a difference. My wife will never become ‘just a health condition' as long as I remember that I'm not the only one.
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