A Conversation for Sex - An Introduction

What am I supposed to feel?

Post 1

Amarfa

I am a woman. What am I supposed to feel when my man "comes"? I hear tell of an "explosion" of sorts, but what's the woman supposed to feel?


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 2

c8zmax

Gratitude


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 3

Tonsil Revenge (PG)

Well, if one of you is doing it right, you'll be so busy feeling something in your own, um, sphere, that it won't really matter what is going on in his.

Since most of his final activity is taking place at a depth beyond your most sensitive areas, I think it would be unusual for you to feel anything. His general reactions and body posture should tell you what is going on.

The "explosion" stuff is usually found in fiction.


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 4

Jab [Since 29th November 2002]

Comatose?


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 5

bikerpete

a warm feeling at the back of the throat


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 6

Margarita

Wow, I'm semi-appalled by the sentiments expressed in this post. A woman asks a question, and gets a few sexist answers. Not all were, some were meant to try to answer, others were demeaning to women and their role in sex. Gratitude is the one post I have a problem with. The warm feeling in the back of the throat is just plain disgusting to me, but that's my personal view and will not elaborate.

Why should a woman feel any gratitude when a man comes inside her above and beyond what the man should feel to be granted that priviledge? A woman does not orgasm due to a man gyrating inside her, it is a lengthy process involving foreplay of at least 14 minutes (this is scientifically proven btw) and stimulation of the clitoris, which is not located where a man inserts himself. It is fairly simple for a man to orgasm, it does not require a female counterpart, masturbation seems to do well enough. I'm not saying that masturbation should take place of sex, ew?, I'm just saying that it's easier for men to orgasm. Very few women orgasm during sex, a lot women do not orgasm until they have reached around 35 or so.

So in other words it is not unusual for a woman not to "feel anything" during sex, especially if their partner has not properly stimulated them to the point of feeling anything. Unless foreplay is done correctly, mostly pain and boredom ensues. This is unfortunate, and hopefully your partner is understanding and cares enough about you to want to fix that. If this is the case, talk to him, and see if you can "mess around" for longer next time before intercourse, making out isn't just for teenagers you know smiley - smiley


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 7

Tonsil Revenge (PG)

I agree, for the most part.
Of course, in a mutually agreed upon physical association, I would say 60% participation is required on both party's part.


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 8

Outer_Real

"A woman does not orgasm due to a man gyrating inside her, it is a lengthy process involving foreplay of at least 14 minutes (this is scientifically proven btw)"

This is the most absurd abuse of science I have read in a long time. How can you possibly "prove" how long it takes for a person to orgasm? If it were done by surveys or questionaires, thats not science, it is statistics. If it were done in experimentally in a lab, then I'm hardly surprised at the results - its hardly a sexy and stimulating environment.

But you know what they say, 87% of all statistics are made up on the spot. My guess is this 14 minutes thing is just that, and has its basis nowhere at all. The extent to which both men and women enjoy sex is overwhelmingly determined by the environment they are doing in it, and how comfortable they feel. If you pick-up a severely drunk teenager at a nightclub, don't expect fireworks.smiley - alesmiley - sadface


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 9

Outer_Real

(If Margarita was intending that to be humerous, I apologise, it was a rant I had to make. But you've got to be clear when you mean these things as jokes, becuase some people go away and believe them)


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 10

Margarita

I apologize, you are correct in the statement that it's not scientifically proven, it's statistically proven. Once I locate the study again I'll post it, otherwise believe what you will. This is an average, some will be way below and others above, everyone is different. The point I was trying to make is that it is usually more time consuming and complex for a woman to orgasm, and that not all women orgasm during the act of sex itself. Sorry again about the mixup!


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 11

Tonsil Revenge (PG)

Empirically gathered data within my own sphere of influence gave me no reason to dispute you, Margarita.

Foreplay very important. Sometimes way more important than the act itself. And properly performed, foreplay can last for days, or even years.


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 12

Libitina1972

First off, as a female it DOES NOT take me 14 minutes to have an orgasm. MOST women DO have orgasm BEFORE 35. And YES, I have had an orgasm during sex....many times, sometimes more than once per encounter. It depends on the position. Your post generalizes women and is incorrect. It may take you that long and maybe you just have not been with the right person


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 13

Tonsil Revenge (PG)

I'm sorry. To which post were you responding?


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 14

Gummimensch

Nothing much.
Only the first three inches of your vagina have nerve endings,
so it`s more or less impossible to actually "feel it".
All that talk of "butterflies fluttering" is just plain bunk.
Just enjoy the facial expression (it doesn`t get much better than that!)smiley - biggrin


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 15

deftona

Its not totally true. If you are very still, sometimes you can feel a few pulsations inside you. Theyre very subtle, but theyre there.


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 16

Tonsil Revenge (PG)

Hmmm... What about Kegels...?


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 17

terry reeves

You are absolutely right, any man that think's he pleases a woman by only having full intercourse, is a plonker. In my experience the woman usually enjoy's plenty of foreplay, and it seems the longer it goes on for the better.smiley - teasmiley - cake


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 18

Nunarssuaq

I just read the whole thread through quickly, and all I can say is: Man, we humans can get a little pointless sometimes.


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 19

Werekitty (Bastet, Tobru Deran, Cymoril)

smiley - laugh Don't worry about those random comments, they were just intended to be humorous.

I hate it when people lump all the responsibility for the female's orgasm on the male. It as much her responsibility for her to exercise and learn what makes her tick as it is for the male to accomodate her (and vice verca).
As to what you should feel it varies. It's true that there are not many actual nerve endings in there, but actual sensitivity can be quite intense when it comes to pressures.
As to tell when he's orgasming a bit of moaning, or speeding up (if he's on top), or going weak or stopping (again if he's on top) is usually a way to tell. But there's no sure fire method beyond 'did you come?' 'yes'.

Obviously as some of the previous suggestions implied if you aren't talking about actual intercourse then it could be anything from feeling p***ed off that you have to wash your hair again to really /really/ wishing you had a nice glass of water.

I think an important thing to say is that there is no 'right' way to behave in sex. There's nothing you're expected to do or know, apart from the risks and preventatives. The most important thing is to explore your own sexuality in your own time, and of course safely. A467912


What am I supposed to feel?

Post 20

flyingtwinkle

if the couple loves each other then it is a binding force for life


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