h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Aliens

The Loch Ness Monster...

Phileas Fogg, well according to Philip Jose Farmer Until later...
BCNU - Crescent

NOW what???

Hmm, I heard a plausible theory. The captains daughter fell into the water, and there were sharks. Everybody rushed to this terrasse like thing at the end of the ship, but because of the weight it broke and they all fell into the water. I don´t remember where I heard it, but look it up. I think there were eye-witnesses to the thing. And there are marks of what could be that terrasse thing.

But then what happened to the life-boat ?

MDS

obviously, the sharks ate the lifeboat, looking for an "after-dinner mint" after their huge meal.

Rye bread?

So how does everybody go insane at once, and all of them have the same idea?

If only half of them went insane, there should be signs of struggle.

It sounds about as probable as the aliens.

Contaminated rye bread is also a thoery behind why the people of Salem went bonkers which then lead on to the witch hunts.

Apparently....

Yeah, everybody went insane at the same time does seems rather weird. But I don´t see why insanity should take the blame for Salem. That was just humans being human. And thereby I mean being intolerant, ignorant xenophobic murderous bxxxxxxs.

The rye theory behind Salem is actually well documented. The witch hunts pursued people who were behaivng antisocially (visions, delusions etc). The staple in Salem at this time was a rye crop, which had failed for two years in a row and the store, which was being used, was believed to be contaminated with ergot - a fungus which can lead to a number of medical catastrophes such as vomitting, gangrene and miscarriages.

If we look at the Salem community affected by the witch hunts and the area believed to be contaminated by ergot, the overlap is quite startling.

It's only a thoery, but a plausible one nonetheless.

Ah, yes.

And this would explain all the other witch burnings in America and Europe? And the long, long history of witch executions?

Damn you, Rye bread. Damn you to hell.

A violently insane person - particularly if it were the captain, might be able to intimidate everyone else to a mad course of action - perhaps the others would think that they could later return after things quieted down - look how often rooms full of victims get shot or harmed because they are cowed by the guy with the gun even though he could not possibly shoot them all if they fought back. So only one person need get 'ryled' up - quite possible...

Also, it seems I have heard of these humongous squid - and a theory that some ships might have been attacked by these - not sure if it was ever thorized about the Mary celeste - but I can clearly see a drawing of this happening in my mind which was published somewhere. I know the largest squid ever sighted were enormous!

Also - why were 1700 casks of alcohol "in effect" half a load? Wouldn't they be 'in fact' half a load? A foot square (or half-metre square) of some enormously heavy substance that weighed the equal of 1700 casks of alcohol would be 'in effect' half a load....

And I LOVE the Salem theory that the SANE people murdered the ones who were 'bewitched' by rye ergot! I also find it totally plausible - after all their heirs elected George Bush!

actually, the crew abandoned ship because they had reason to believe that by means of the damaged alcohol cask there was an explosion to happen. Probably, there already was a minor explosion / puffing noise. Then a fresh wind took the brigantine away so the lifeboat couldn't follow. That garantueed a safe distance, in case the boat would indeed explode.

It's funny that aliens were mentioned. An episode of Doctor Who had the Daleks exterminating the crew.