A Conversation for What to Expect When You Become a Carer in the UK
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calmed Started conversation Jun 30, 2005
Thanks for the well written article, I am at the crossroads in life when mum has been diagnosed with Alzihmers and although dad was coping well he now needs an ear operation which will leave him permanently deaf, this is going to have a severe impact on his caring role.
I will have to decide do i give up work , do i move as close to them as possible or even in with them as communication between them is going to be very difficult. I also have a partner who is under going assessment for heart /lung transplant and the small problem of two children aged 9 and 11 who live with me.
My main difficulty is no-one seem able to give a straight answer to my benefits/financial questions they all say I need to apply once I am in my new circumstances, but how can I make an informed choice if i don't know what we would be expected to live on.
anyone any suggestions???
thankyou
Mag Ratte Posted Jul 13, 2005
You haven't said whether you're an only child - is there enayone else who could do part of what's needed? If I were you, I'd prioritise the children and your partner, then only after you're sure you've got any spare energy & time, see to your parents.
I realise this sounds harsh, but your parents won't be happier if your children end up in care and your partner ends up in & out of hospital.
Push hard for your parents to be jointly assessd by social services, and make it quite clear that you're currently in no position to provide substanial amounts of care & supervision.
At the same time, get yourself a carer's assessment (caring for your partner), and hopefully this should just about cover some of the help you need. Your partner should probably be getting at least DLA if not Incapacity Benefit too.
As far as benefits & finnacial advice go, don't ask the DWP, Jobcentre, or the Benefits Agency - they're not qualified to give such advice. Instead, ask the CAB, Disability Rights Advice centre, or Welfare Rights centre. Good luck, you'll need it.
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