A Conversation for Defenestration

Specialized defenestration

Post 1


Embittered spouses/significant/insignificant others often practice defenestration in highly specific ways, such as:

"Bobbittizing": Perhaps the most famous specialization - involves the throwing of a recently removed body part out of a moving window. This requires some advance preparation, namely, the removal of the wayward body part from the body. Due to a high probability of resistance from the 'donor' and severe consequences should local authorities view the defenestration as anything other than a 'harmless prank', this specialization is only practiced by very highly motivated (see embittered) practicioners.

"Delayed action defenestration": This variant often is practiced upon TV sets, and seems to follow a weekend of heavy football viewing (accompanied by much beer drinking and carousing with 'the boys') which is masking repeated requests from a spouse or housemate to mow the lawn or clean the garage or fix the dishwasher. The avid football fan congratulates himself on having escaped this task, and so is dumfounded to return home from work on Monday (expecting more football) to find the TV set in the front yard and the front window shattered.

"Full contact": A spur of the moment defenestration occurring when the hand is quicker than the eye. Namely, the spouse is trying to get his attention at a party, but his eye refuses to leave the cleavage of the woman across the room, resulting in a quick shove, and a flailing flight into the punchbowl on the patio three floors below.

Specialized defenestration

Post 2


I'll talk to one of the sub-eds about adding this bit to the article: it's really good!

Key: Complain about this post

Specialized defenestration

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more