A Conversation for Queuing
The Wall Started conversation Jun 28, 2000
The equation presented in the Art of Queuing omitted to take into account the effect of babies on queue tolerance. If there's ever been a nipper squalling behind you at the Post Office, you'll know what I mean.
To this end I've done some experimental queuing with my son in tow (he's 1). I concluded that an additional term should be applied to the equation:
T[breakdown] = 3 ( T[sigh] + (5 x Q[behind]) - (2 x Q[infront]) ) x I x B
where B, the Baby Factor is calculated thus:
B = (1/(D*A*N))^-2
D, Duration of crying (in seconds)
A, Amplitude of crying (in dB)
N, number of shopping bags held by parent
The relative position of the baby in the queue has no effect,
neither does the presence or absence of a pram or pushchair.
Where there are no babies in the queue, the B term defaults to 1.
This solution is the result of 4 visits to Safeway on foot, so it should be considered a quick empirical deduction (rule of thumb) rather than a statistically proven analysis. I will not be testing the results for repeatability unless we run out of milk again when my wife's out.
Key: Complain about this post