h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"To have a friend you must also be a friend - and be prepared to be there for them should they need you. Failure in this respect would label you a fairweather friend and you would most probably be dumped."

I fell out with a friend, not because she was a fairweather friend exactly, more that she just never made any effort. I talked about it to her once and she said if anything really bad happened she'd be in the car and down the road in a second. The problem was, *unless* something really bad happened for her, I never heard from her. Things were going pretty well for me and in two years she could barely be bothered to drop the odd email or make the odd phonecall. She said she'd be there if anything went wrong but I like my friends to be available to celebrate the happy stuff too.

I think it takes more to keep a friendship than maintaining boundaries and avoiding having sex with a person. You need to make the effort to keep things going from time to time too, especially if you end up living in different parts of the country.

I agree.
But every friendship is unique, like every relationship. I have lots of friends but they would probably have different things to say about me. I couldn't write about every aspect of every friendship.

My best friend from school, we were each other's chief bridesmaid and godmother to our daughters. Now we exchange birthday cards and Christmas cards and that's it. We don't live that far away but she's married and I'm not. I have a child at home, she doesn't. We have nothing in common, only the past.

I think friendships change but the memories don't, I feel quite sad that we can't make the time to see one another (she doesn't even own a computer or I'd email her) yet we still keep the resemblance of a relationship there, with the exchange of cards.