h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Continued from the two previous JoPos.


Now, calling the little towns' offices can be fun. (*)

The big ones have teams of full-time workers and they have a lot of events every year, so they know their job pretty well.

Small towns and villages, a lot of the time, have a part-time worker doing the job, sometimes for several villages.

Most of them are really nice and helpful, but sometimes they're really not quite sure what their job is as far as we're concerned. With one death and two weddings a year, though, who could blame them?


Here are a few real conversations that have happened to me in the 3 months I've been working here :


"Oh, I sent you the death forms for the two we had in the last trimester. That's how it's done, yes? No? Really? Ah. You need them within seven days. I see. Mmmmh. (...) Yes, yes, we've had weddings in the village, indeed. Do you need those too? Oh, I'll see if I can find them, then".

"You're missing wedding number 3? Ah, yes. My colleague was supposed to send it to you. Oh well, I'm sending it right now, then."
Two weeks later, wedding number 3 is still missing...

"We've had a baby born in the village. Hadn't happened in 40 years! Could you send me a form? Never even seen one!"
Well, if you have internet access, you can download it from our website, that would be best, because you know, deadlines and all that.
"Oh of course, would you mind guiding me through that?"
(...)
"Oh, it's pink! That's really cute! But, my printer is only black and white... Will that be alright?"
Yes, absolutely fine, don't worry.


(*) "You are ringing the Town Hall of City-Village. We're open from 10:42 to 10:48 on Saturday nights, but only if it's a full moon. You cannot leave a message after the beep, you cannot send us an email or a fax. You can try to send us a letter, but if it gets to us on a day when the birds have flown west, we will burn it and curse you with a most painful death".

[Amy P]

One baby in forty years! Wow

What a fab journal today, Superfrenchie! That's sending me off on my day with a on my face.

Deb

Love the last paragraph.

"You can try to send us a letter, but if it gets to us on a day when the birds have flown west, we will burn it and curse you with a most painful death".