h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

i was tempted to post in the "how many jobs have you had" thread, but it's better to do that in my own space. after all, if you're looking here you MIGHT care to know that i've been:

liquor store clerk; insulation installer, carpenter, playground supervisor, delivery driver, harvester of apples, grapefruit, pears, currants, grapes, lemons, cucumbers, plums, avocadoes, lettuce, broccoli, walnuts, tomatoes and strawberries, basketball referee, forklift driver, poultry farmhand, dock worker, fisherman for salmon, herring and tuna, translator, teacher of english, history and mathematics, waiter, bartender, cook, football coach, fishmonger, factory worker making paint, plastic pipe and cardboard boxes, fence builder, entomological inspector, translator, supermarket produce manager, quality technician, project manager, logistics technician...

not in strict chronological order, except for the first and last. before all this i was just a kid, and after i hope to remain one (so far so good!)

best job: this one
worst job: poultry (you think you don't hate chickens? just try it!)
best paid this one (see the correlation?)
worst paid: i once worked 2 weeks building fence and got STIFFED!
most interesting: entomology
least interesting: all interesting though some i just didn't do long enough to get bored.
hardest: herring fishing. first chip ice off the boat for an hour, then get to WORK! dock work 2nd, especially after biking 35km to work!
(ah, when i was a lad...)
easiest: playground (after all, i'm a kid, remember?)

Ahh, i know this feeling, try writing a CV for folks like us and it reads like an A to Z!

"officially" i suppose i am a teacher, but have also done...thinks...bound to miss some out, try starting at age 14 and thinking onwards to now, age 49...

hairdressers assistant
nursery assistant (kids, not plants, they would have been easier though)
Primary school teacher
Social worker
Freelance photographer
Teacher of photography
teacher again, but also in charge of school farm in africa "no dear, don't pet the crocodile"
Cleaner, private homes and pubs and factories
pyramid selling of aloe vera products
Charity worker (tin rattling)
Manager of first delicatessen in pakistan
Owner and manager of health food restaurants
Holiday rep, mobile homes
Organic farm worker (unpaid)
Busking
Writer
Artist
Publicity agent for music
private english teaching
Assisting with translation for french estate agents


*sigh* the careers teacher reckoned i should be ideally suited to being a window dresser " you are artistic but impatient", reckon she was right!

Jack of all trades, master of...some.



zdt

andy warhol started as a window dresser, and i believe yves saint laurent did as well.

OK... these are the paid ones!

paper boy, questionnaire translator, car park attendant, warehouseman, grinding wheel operator, examination board clerk, night minibus driver, night minibus supervisor, examination board supervisor, administrator for undergraduate dental school, football scores broadcast assistant, database administrator for medical website, customer service for educational books, radio studio and studio manager allocator, television graphics designer / picture editor / scriptwriter, television producer and reporter, radio presenter, radio football match reporter.

I think that's everything...

why am i not surprised that hootooers have long and varied job histories?

the absolute opposite is a fellow who retired from here a few years ago... he started in this factory as an apprentice at 14 and retired at 63. there have been 4 different companies doing business here in all that time, so he technically changed employers, but really spent 46 years in the same office. and until recently he still came to the canteen for lunch!

now get this: he lived with his parents in the house where he was born (about 3 blocks from here) until he got married. after the wedding his parents MOVED OUT and he stayed in the house.

he has his daily beer in a café just down the street called the "spoutnik" to give you an idea when IT was founded...

in brief, in his whole life he's lived in ONE house, had ONE job and patronized ONE café, all in a quarter mile radius! i kid you NOT!

i wish there was a bit more of that sort of thing happening.

i mean, i was desperate to leave Staffordshire (where I grew up) and did so at the first opportunity because there was very little going on.

but one of the most noticeable things about my bit of London is how transient most of the population is, and as a corollary how few people actually care about the area and keeping it nice.

and yet the neighborhood i'm talking about is one of the most dismal in what is really a jewel of a city!