h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My softball roster is getting pretty full. Pretty soon I'll have to create some new positions, like "left-center-middle fielder," or "waterboy," or even "drunk mascot."

How about someone to carry the beer and make sure the outfield doesn't run out and someone to hold the sun umbrella over my bean bag. and some cheerleaders would be nice,

That's O.K....I'll just stand here at the end of the line. That's where I've always been. Nothing new. Always the last one picked for the team. If they pick me at all. Then all I'll do is sit on the bench. Well, at least I'll be close to the cheerleaders! Not like they'd talk to me,anyway. Go on, have your team, I'll be fine...really,..I will. Go on, don't mind me.(feeling guilty yet? Marvin taught me well!)

1) You don't get picked for this team, you just ask to be added. As far as I can tell, you haven't asked yet. You also need to say what position you can play.

2) You don't have to worry about sitting on the bench. Everyone gets a couch. (And if you read my entry on "Geeker Ball," you will understand the importance of couches)

3) There are no cheerleaders yet. There may be one day, but no one has asked to be one so far.

4) If you can't play any standard softball position, we could always use someone to hold the sun umbrella over Ac-1D's beanbag chair.

and of course THE MOST IMPORTANT POSITION on the team: The person who carries the beer. Without a really talented individual in this position the entire on-field dynamic could completely fall apart...

pretty please let me be on your team. i can yell mean things at the other team or make chocolate cake and lemonade. hell, ill do almost anything! i have met most of the other players.

i can carry beer too, Ac-1D

I promise you will be added, but I have to go to sleep now. Don't worry, I won't forget.

If you would be so kind, i would like to be on your team. As for positions, I must say I'm not much the athletic type. I would volunteer to cary the beer, but everyone would get upset when all they got was empty cans(bottles, pints, mugs, schooners, etc.,ad infinitum) But I must say that holding the umbrella sounds to be a most interesting position.(unless you get cheerleaders and they need a coach!)

Welcome to the team Kat!

Congratulations, you made the team! Of course, everyone makes the team, so it isn't anything to be real proud of. Make sure you keep Ac-1D nice and shaded. And take pride in the condition of our couches - they are our most valued possesions.

yippy!!

I shall proudly hold the umrella in the most professional manner I am able. I can assure you if Ac-1D is not in the shade, it will be through no fault of mine! I look forward to the opening game!

Don't forget about the couches! The umbrella provides shade for Ac-1D, but we all get a couch, and a relaxed team is a winning team. And nothing is harder to relax on than a dirty couch.

Do not worry. I did not forget the couches! They shall be kept spotless and well fluffed!(one certainly could not relax on a matted couch) If the players would like, I'll even spice them with thier favorite fragrance. All they need do is tell me what that might be. After all, I do not wish to be the cause of any losses!

i'd like mine to smell like vanilla please

I'll see if I can find it in blue!

I'd like a beverage holder installed in the arm of my couch. As far as a fragrance, I'll take the smell of victory!

Do you need that holder set up for cans, bottles, pints, schooners, pitchers, etc.---------You know what they say, "The devil is in the details"!

Bottles, I suppose. But you can't beat one-size-fits-all.