h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I’m fifty-six and rising, my pension is in view
Retirement is looming, and then what shall I do?
The house is nearly ready, I’ve been working on it hard
But life deals out some awkward hands, so who holds the trump card?

I have the usual aches and pains that go with being fifty
I like to feel I move the same, but I know I’m not as nifty.
My girls made me a Granny, (grandchildren number three)
And they know I can’t get on the floor, because of gammy knee

They sit me down with books and toys and wriggle on my lap
I read to them and play with them, then they let me have a nap.
I rise to make my way back home, and straighten out the knees
But have to wait for bones to “crack” before I can move with ease.

I do not smoke or drink or snort, I live a healthy life
But healthy’s what my body ain’t , there’s always the constant strife
Of stiffened joints and failing teeth, and glasses for my reading
A deafness is a-setting in, do you see where this is leading?

It strikes me that as time moves on, and the older I am getting
More bits fall off, or seize or fail, and do you know, I’m betting
That before I get to sixty I shall fail my MOT
But does that mean the scrap heap? Oh, no, not that for me!

I shall make my world a little smaller so that I can surely cope
And expand my mind, and look around with excitement and with hope
Because this Universal Granny won’t be done for by a mile
Not while there is hootoo, good books, and a

Huzzah! For the will to go on! And !

Hi Universal Granny! I didn't know you were a poet! I like your attitude, staying young in spirit. I've started walking twice a week with a new friend - she is younger than me and it is hard to keep up. I was surprised how out of shape I've gotten, I'm huffing and puffing after 20 minutes. But at least, walking with a partner, I am more likely to keep the appointment!

JEllen

hiya universal geanny. that poem reminds of one my mum wrote, the'retirement rap'. do you mind if i send her yours? i enjoyed it.

xx

xx<

Wow! You can send your Mum anything you like if there's on offer!

Any chance of a to go with it - or is that pushing my luck!

Take care, daraline, Universal Granny

oooooo,you are sooo clever!!!
i love it...i must get hubby to print it out for me!!!.x

. there you go universal granny.

xx

sent it to mum.

xx

Just got into work, daraline, and that was most welcome!

Hi smurfles, glad you liked it!

Off to see what the night holds for me now, back later

Take care Universal Granny

Hello Mystrunner, haven't heard from you for a while, how's you doing?

JEllen - you mean you can go for 20 minutes before you start huffing and puffing!!! Twenty seconds is more my limit - as you say, out of shape. Mind you, I am not sure what my shape should be, it's so long since I've seen it in its correct form.

for you both

Take care Universal Granny

Great poem UG! Love the optimism. Wish i could find
a) the talent
b) the time

to write properly. I really must get to grips with it, been promising myself to write something for years!

Here have another (dont want to think of you wasting away!).

All the best

Spike

Hi Spike! Wasting away! You must be kidding! I could do David Blaine's job and still come out a "fattie"!!!

With regards to having the time for writing - you have a young family to support I believe, and in that case you will never have the time - BUT my family are up and gone now, and when yours leaves you - you will have the time.

Be patient and in the meantime be observant. People-watch - it's a great pastime. When watching television programmes, especially live or documentaries, don't watch the main character, watch the Indian tribesmen/football crowd/lone passer-by that is in the background, they are not the main part of the programme, but they all have their story to tell.

Just because you cannot write now doesn't mean you never will - it's just not the right time yet.

Can you guess I am passionate about this? Sorry for the lecture, especially when you so kindly gave me some <and All gratefully received, do you want to share?

Take care UG

always love to share and !! Thank you kindly.
And yes you're passion about writing did come across! And dont worry about the lectuire, i get used to them!

Any other idea's you have, feel free to let me know...oh yes. and if and when i do get around to putting pen to paper, I'll make sure you get the dubious benfit of reviewing it.



Spike

Doing well, Granny! Just pottering about.

Nice one Granny

I love it! Well done!

my mum liked it so much, she's saved it to disc on her pc.

xx

for Mum

for you

Universal Granny

leaves and

Thanks, Tabitca, that went down very well at the beginning of what is promising to be a very gritty night shift!!

Take care Universal Granny