h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What is it about the number 168?

Today I was quite happily searching the conversations to see if anyone had been talking about my story (I'm curious like that ), when I find out there happen to be loads of conversations involving that number in one way or another. And not one of them (well actually maybe one or two, but I already knew about them) was about my story! I find this particularly disturbing, not just that they weren't talking about my story (which is disturbing enough) but that all of these conversations were about completely different subjects!

Anyway, I've annoyed you all long enough with my adverts for my story (believe me, I'm not normally one to advertise), so I'll leave you to scour <./>thePost</.> in peace. Just keep in mind the disturbing nature of the number - 168.

look verc - don't go too crazy! i've read your story. if you want a comment about it then here you go...

firstly, i remember reading in another convo about your story that someone said it was a bit like dna's work. i can quite truthfully say it is not. it has a totally different and original feel to it.

secondly, the humour. i'm guessing this is meant to be a very funny story. my truthful opinion on the humour is that what you write isn't really funny. a couple of times it does have it's moments, but on the whole it doen't. however, the actual occurances in the story are humourous happenings. it's the type of thing where you laugh at terry rather then the text. not saying tha's a bad thing since that could qite easily be your aim. i would read your mind using my mind reading techniques but you are too far away.

thirdly, i think the story is alright. it seems to have some sort of purpose, is interesting, has weird happenings, so it's alright. the only thing i don't really like is that it takes too long for something important to happen. no examples since i read it yesterday and can't remember any, but i found it seemed to drag on a bit.

fourthly, any info on upcoming storylines? i can guess the story is the 168th greatest, but i don't know if there is any relevance to 168 to anything or not.

fifthly, can terry count? it seemed strange in the last part that he went through the wrong door when he was told which one it was. of course, he seems to be a bit of a no brainer throughout the whole story.


so, that's my commenting of it. would you like to comment on my story i wrote for the post a while back? i never finished it but i put all the parts together in one entry. if you do then i'll find the link for it, and you can comment on it like i commented on yours.

spook - looks forward to part 6, or perhaps part 7 or 8 if he decided to read multiple parts one after the other like he did last night!

Thats great spook . I always appreciate honest comments.

, in essence it wasn't originally mean't to be a comedy. I think people will pick from it what they want, some will find it humerous, though some may not. The idea that it could be humourous came more to me at the end of the first part and through the second part. Part 3 was the first one I really planned, which I didn't think was particularly humourous.

Part four started off in a similar way, but I think towards the end I tried to make it funnier. I may be being quite boastful here, but despite it being the shortest of the chapters so far, my favourite is part 5 (though along side the first part).

I think you may find part 6 (in this thursday's post), may explain things a bit better. I'm afraid I may have been a bit slow in getting the details of the story, and may have dragged some things out. I can't really give too much away, suffice to say you'll see more of Terray Horowitz, Norman, Turk and Revo Recma (The last two have only just been introduced in part 5).

Terry can count, but to be fair I think I'd be a bit punch drunk after what he had been through, and he has basically lost count. He was genuinely looking for the toilet. Also Tommy isn't exactly reliable, and he may have mean't the 127th door or something like that. Though Terry probably isn't the most intelligent man on the planet.

This is my first real attempt at doing something like this, so I am learning along the way. I always welcome any comments about a story I write, and am actually quite relieved if someone does say they have a qualm about something. I'm not necesarily going to change the story drastically because of something someone says, but as I said I am learning all the time, trying to find out what people like in a story.

Most people seemed to quite like the first part for some reason, so maybe I should look in to that a bit more.

As for the 168th Greatest Story itself, I think it would be fair to say that the story is more significant than the fact it is the 168th story. Though it is significant.

Anyway, spook I would love to read your story if you could give me the link for it.

Keep on reading And feel free to add any other comments you see fit to add.

Verc

sure thing!

A640883 The End of Space - The Story So Far
A640595 The End of Space - Characters

that's my story. i had loads of ideas for it, and it was something i started writing for the post not long after i joined. i'm thinking of finishing it this summer, so honest, truthful opinions would be helpful.

spook

Right, I'm going to be completely honest here so please forgive me if any of my comments appear a bit blunt.

Apart from a few minor spelling errors (which I am prone to myself), I think you have some very interesting ideas. The combination of the three main characters Jim Jiggle, John Smith and GORDAN (a MARVIN derivative?) could really create a spark in the story. Them being on a stolen ship Bravado (like the heart of gold?), also gives an interesting plot to follow. However, I'm not really sure I can see where it is going.

One thing I did notice was that you do seem to over state things, and perhaps state somethings which are perhaps a little obvious E.g. "A Billion as in 1 million multiplied by 1 thousand". This has the unfortunate effect of making me switch off briefly, and making me have to go back and read it again. But then again maybe I've just got a short attention span.

One other observation, and its only an observation mind you, is that you seem to get a bit cruder in chapter 2. Not that this is necesarily a bad thing in real life, and don't normally have a problem with it, but given that Shazz told me that she would have to edit out a few "bloody hell"'s out of my story, I'm not sure how she would react to - "We Are All A Bunch Of B******s’", but I don't know if you were already given the go ahead for this to be in the post so she may have already OK-ed it.

Though I'm not quite sure that the size of Jim Jiggles genetallia really adds anything to the story. I think you may be trying to use this humorously, but I don't think it has the desired effect that you might want. However I am only one person, and I have no idea what you think and what others might think.

I can see, however, the naked blond woman character working - depending on how you develop the story. Anyway I'll leave that up to you.

On the whole, I think you've got a very good concept, which I would be very interested in seeing how it develops.

I hope that was alright,
Verc

in response to your comments...

i made spelling errors? i thought i'd put that page together from the post corrected version, but maybe i didn't. oh well!

GORGAN is simlilar to marbin, but different in the character elements and personality. Bravado simily to Heart f Gold as well, except without the added bonus of an infinite improbability drive.

the thing you noticed about oversating about the billion, i can't remember where i put that since it's been a while but it strikes me that i put that in since a billion can either be 1 million times 1 thousand or 1 million times 1 million, depending on whether you go by the british or american billion. i can't remember which is which, but it strikes me that's why i put that in there.

what actually appears on that evrsion is what has appeared in the post, so i guess it must have been more accepting of swearing back then. i wouldn't have thought bloody hells with bloody starred out would have been a problem though. i think the only thing that apears in the version you read and did not appear in the post is references to christianity in chapter 3. i think shazz just took it out when she put it in, most likely to be cautious about christians being offended, but she never told me and i never asked why. i personally like that bit, and being a christian am not offended about it.

>"Though I'm not quite sure that the size of Jim Jiggles genetallia really adds anything to the story."

that must be from chapter 2 i think. can't remember why i put that in. was probably just trying to make jokes or sexual ennuendo.

the naked blonde character - if you want to know a big big secret about that character, which will be revealed sometime when i finish the story, is that the blonde's name is Eve. i don't think i wrote that in, but i remember thinking about how to reveal it a bit. the idea of it all is that Eve is the Eve from the Garden of Eden, creation story etc, and i was gonna create some sort of connection with that somewhere down the line.

thanks for the coments. i know now that at least 1 person has read my story!

spook

"the idea of it all is that Eve is the Eve from the Garden of Eden, creation story etc, and i was gonna create some sort of connection with that somewhere down the line."

Mmm... sounds very interesting , I look forward to seeing the next part

COMING TO A H2G2 NEAR YOU IN 2003!

I look forward to it

Do you have any other stories that I might be interested in looking at?

168?
Thats my number as ranking member of Red dwarf.