h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Whale it might be a good idea if you at least trimmed it a bit before the nesting season begins.

Or ZZ Top come to town

I normally have a shave on the grounds that "my beard smells"

But hey, some people say it makes me look foxy!

(Does anyone else hate it when tramps start chatting them up as well...)

I'm currently mit van Demon, but I tend to keep it shortis coz it gets in a terrible mess otherwise

You are still talking about beards I take it?

Eeraahh mate, I love the smell of must in the morning.

Yes lil, we're still on about the beard.

Oh! Just checking



Must what Odo?

Shampooing a beard is an awkward procedure. Especially if, like me, you tend to have a bath rather than shower, and wash your hair by sliding down the bath and dunking your head underwater. The chin tends to stick out...

That would be a problem!

Must - as in a foxes odor. Perhaps I ought to check the spelling of that one.

Egon, I know this might be complex for a male, but have you ever thought of lying face down? Either that, or you could dunk the thing in a bison of water.

which leaves me mainly nice and clean, but with a beard thick with gloppy white stuff, which might give the tramps the wrong idea...

re: lying face down.

When I'm in the bath, due to the quite extraordinary length of my body, in order to get my head into the water, I must have my knees sticking right up in the air, with the lower legs touching the uipper legs- I need a diagram...


Anyway, I can't stick my knees up if I'm face down.

You could always take up swimming

No, but you can stick your legs in the air, just bend them at the knees.

Sorry Egon, I'd forgotten the dimensions of normal sized bath tubs. I'd still suggest using a couple of bisons of water, and washing your beard whilst kneeling down.

Ralph, Egon it about 6 ft 8 tall and ordinary bath just isn't long enough to acomodate him.

But the length of my upper leg, aded to the rest of my body, may still be a little long for my bath...

Andf I can't swim.

If I drown trying to wash my beard, you lot are to blame you know!

Local swimming pool?

Oooooooooooooh help!!



The mind boggles

..and I should make entirely clear that odo has never seen me have a bath. She is merely correctly speculating from my height...