h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Not beige in that respect, but the bland boring bureacrats who run things, you know....the faceless ones.

Yes the ones who think smugly as they sit in their nice warm offices that a brief spell in the freezer will be good for some of us.

Now you've got it, those ones.

The beige ones, who conform.

Oh them, I wonder if a suitable application of the contents of the cow shed would be of any use!

You have grown so much my young Padawan apprentice.

Right, time to find a shovel then. Oh this should be fun.

Need a hand??? In fact here borrow my incontinent herd of cows.

Oh thanks, that'll save getting the shovel dirty anyway.

Right in here then girls, make yourselves at home.

Room echhoes to sound of happy cows and Odo and Devoid shovelling.

NOw, where did I leave my balista and that old rusty trebuchet.

The trebuchet seems to be in the corridoor still, I haven't seen the balista at all though.

Trip wires, trip wires, now where......ah there.

Rubs hands together and immediately regrets it.

To be continued......more tomorrow.

Well, I have to say that was the est conversation I have ever read

And it looks set to get er.

But that's hootoo for you. You can crreate whatever you want!

Could be worse I suppose, we could be talking about worms or something.

Well that could always be managed.

I'd watch where you are standing at the moment if I were you. Look grab those spare wellies from over there, you'll be a lot safer.

There's worms in there!!!

Why haven't we got a smiley for a worm? They feel a little left out.

There's all sorts floating round in this lot.

Lets get a smiley first though.

I'm going now.

My boss is giving me a lift. See you tomorrow!!

Have fun then

So things just get even better here!

Still no heating of course; but to turn up to work and nearly get blown up! Things are getting beyond a joke.

The caretaker had brought over a gass fire to try and warm the place up a bit. He lit it at about 6:30am and left. I opened the doors about 20mins ago to be greeted by a waves of gass filled air. The pilot light had gone out, so instead of pumping out heat, we've been left with a gas filled room.

I'm now sitting here with all doors and windows open.

Hoorahh, this is turing out to be a great week.