h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yes, but they all have better pillows than I do.

Sounds like it's time for you to do an all-out search for a new pillow...

Yeah, preferably one that breathes, is warm, and is a good kisser. I need a nice male-type pillow, I think.

Ooooooooooh, one of *those* types of pillows.....


The teddybear type. I see....

*can't believe there's no smiley*

Yeah, you don't find *that* kind of pillow just lying around your average discount-thrift store. Nooooooo. You need to go to a really fine establishment to find one of those.

I want one with a bit of razor stubble, so I can get a nice friction burn on my face.

Better keep the number of the fire department handy, you'll be needing that beard burn put out!

Not if I set the pillow on fire first! Ha!

a hunka hunka burnin' LOVE !

I'm a hopelessly demented washcloth, you know?

How do you set fire to a wet washcloth?

I have some razor stubble at the moment.
I use cheap disposable razors, so there's
always a bit that gets missed when I shave.

But my hair is tough and knotted and matted
except when I keep it short. I've broken
many a comb trying to comb it.

Lady Scott, do I look a little bit like
Beethoven?

*slips Beethoven into VCR, watches*


That big slobbery dog?


No, I don't think so....

*compares pictures of Paul*


No, not at all...


Well, the only similarities I see are the fact that you both have eyes, ears noses and mouths.... but not even the same kind.



No, you don't look at all like Beethoven.

Be careful to whom you offer your pillow services, Paul!

I'm a most repulsively unattractive washcloth (despite Lady Scott's *LIES* to the contrary), who is not designed for anything but scrubbing bumpers and wiping up hairballs. There isn't a male-type pillow on earth who would snuggle me. I know this from long hard experience, trust me.

*points AWK to F63252?thread=211198&skip=219&show=9 and F23612?thread=208191&skip=20&show=12 and stubbornly tries some of her same arguments on AWK, except for the not relevant ones... (which would be the 'He says so' and the mention of the ostrich...)*

I *know* I don't look like the
named Beethoven, Lady Scott. I was talking
about a much earlier Beethoven who wrote
symphonies so loud that only semi-deaf
people could figure out what they were
about.

Fine, Avenging Washcloth. If you're
as plain as you claim, you must be made
from hair-shirt material, or thistles.


But I suspect that you look better than that.
Anyway, love is blind.

Nah, a friend of mine once pointed out that if love is blind ... why do they sell so much lingerie?

He had a point.


















... right on the top of his head.

I tell you the honest truth... she may be the evil twin, but she's the pretty one.

no no no no no no noooooooo.

Repugnant, and getting worse all the time.

Possible reasons why
and might buy lingerie:

--To keep their womernfolk warm in the winter.
--To wear themselves when they want to cruise the bars
--To participate in the Tour de France.
--To give to poor children in Africa who don't have any