h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi! *scrolls back up to see the fork question*

Hm? Right. Okay.

***BEGIN IMPORTANT MESSSAGE***

**BEGIN SECTION 'WHAT KRISSY SHOULD DO ABOUT HER FORK-CLEANLINESS PROBLEM'**

*BEGIN BEGINNING OF THE BEGINNING OF THE SECTION. ADVICE TO FOLLOW*

Wash the ones you've got, or, failing that, buy some new ones from that charming bum with no teeth you see every morning. You know he's not using 'em.

*END ADVICE. END BEGINNING OF THE BEGINNING SECTION*

**END SECTION 'WHAT KRISSY SHOULD DO ABOUT HER FORK-CLEANLINESS PROBLEM'**

***END IMPORTANT MESSAGE***

***BONUS MESSAGE TO FOLLOW***

**REALLY SOON**

*I'M GETTING TIRED OF TYPING LIKE THIS*

*NO, REALLY*

It would also go without saying that, if you bought any forks from the toothless guy, it'd be a good idea to wash them as well.

*END--ah, why bother? *stomps off*

Or, um, I could purchase some plastic ones from the corner store. If I was going to buy some anyway.

My question was if I could eat the cake with my hands, but I don't really care anymore.

Oh, you were going to EAT it? I thought you were going to do what everyone else did: Nail it to the door to ward off evil spirits.

Ahhhhhh well that's better because my nails are VERY clean.

*desperately wants to say something about a "filthy screw"*

krissy knew that doing the washing up just meant a brief transitory illusion. a cruel glimpse of an unattainable civilization where one plucked a mug or a plate at will from the tempting gleaming pile - squandered resources - and made each new coffee in a fresh cup. a paradise soon lost, and in an obscenely brief time, the pile is back, only this time it seems bigger, scummier, even more teetering

NOTE: the above was stolen from the now bruised and beaten pockets of ben elton

Can I have some coffee, Ben?

Only if you wash the mug yourself.

Of course. Hey! I have to take a picture of my excellent coffee cup one of these days. I love my excellent coffee cup.

Well, what does your excellent coffee cup look like? Because, I mean, you could theoretically have a perfectly normal coffee cup and just THINK it was excellent because it held coffee. A REAL excellent coffee cup should....have something... special about it or something. I think.

It has MONKEYS on it! Not only that, it has one monkey that has a banana, and one that doesn't and the one that doesn't looks sort of, I don't know, vaguely resentful of the one that does.

That, and it's really big. Holds me about a pint of coffee.

I think that a vaugely resentful monkey mug is a GREAT mug. I approve.

GET THIS MAN SOME COFFEE!

*feels contented that Krissy approves of the mug*

*hugs Spartus in a spontaneous moment of mug celebration*

YAY!

There should be a mug celebration day. I'm very proud of mine.

i'm feeling NEED right now
a need to see this mug
a picture
a drawing
it doesn't matter
i just need a glancin