Journal Entries
POS Theory
Posted Oct 15, 1999
In the shop I where I work we have a classification system for the condition of vehicles. It is based on the commonly accepted 'piece-of-s**t' terminology. There are four stages which are based on the three main parts of a vehicle: exterior appearance, interior appearance, and running gear.
1) Cherry - The vehicle has no noticeable problems. The exterior has no dents larger than door dings. The interior is clean and unmolested with no broken pieces. The car runs fine, does not leak oil, and makes no strange sounds.
EXAMPLE: My parents have a '98 Dodge Grand Caravan with 36,000 on the odometer. It looks, runs, and drives like new. (Although some people would argue that all Chrysler products have POS status straight off the assembly line.)
2) P.O.S. - Pronounced Pee Oh Ess 'Piece Of S**t' The vehicle may have one of the three main parts in advanced disrepair, or two in minor disrepair.
EXAMPLE: One of the guys I work with has a '91 Nissan SE-V6 King-Cab 4WD Pickup. He recently wrecked it and had body work done at one of the local body shops. The body looks nice from a distance, but up close you notice the aftermarket (Sorta-Fit) body panels don't line up perfectly. The interior looks brand new. The engine runs fine but some exhaust studs are broken, making a loud exhaust note.
3) R.O.P.O.S. - Pronounced Row Poss 'Ragged Out Piece Of S**t' The vehicle may have two of the three main parts in advanced disrepair, or all three in minor disrepair.
EXAMPLE: My '81 Chevy Camaro has a perfect body, except for the fact that the paint is just about worn off. It's dull and in some places worn through, but there are no dents or rust. The interior is intact, but the carpet is not factory and doesn't quite fit right. Also the speakers are coming loose from the door panels. The engine and transmission run great but are both leaking oil.
4) F.R.O.P.O.S. - Pronounced Frow Poss 'Friggin Ragged Out Piece Of S**t' All three of the three main parts of the vehicle are in an advanced state of disrepair.
EXAMPLE: My '83 Mazda RX-7 GSL has several small dents and a large dent under the left rear. It has been repainted once and that paint is cracking. There is a small amount of rust beginning to appear behind the hatchback glass. The carpet is missing in the hatchback area. The dashlights don't work. I removed the CD player. The seatcovers are starting to split. The door panels I made don't match the rest of the interior. The engine ran fine until a month ago when it blew a side seal. It has a steady miss that will require rebuilding to fix. It has always leaked copious amounts of oil.
The vehicle's classification is always estimated in a loud volume vocally as it is brought into the shop. Whenever it is a vehicle belonging to a co-worker we always make an initial assumption that it it a ROPOS. We adjust the assumption upon closer inspection.
Where does your car fit?
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Latest reply: Oct 15, 1999
NUTS! Part 2
Posted Oct 15, 1999
I tore the Max down again today. I found the chain guide bolts tight, which is a relief because it's not my fault now. However the rear upper chain tensioner that I had problems with is stuck. To remove it I have to pull the valve cover, which sits under the intake plenum. I had two other jobs - got them done and got back on the Max. Unbolted the plenum and hung it from the hood with a coathanger (it's still attached by some hoses). I removed the valve cover and a small cover over the tensioner. I unbolted the tensioner and removed it. I can't even pry it up with my fingers!
I had to overnight order the new tensioners, I'm replacing all of them (the front upper chain tensioner is much easier to access). Tomorrow morning I'll start putting it back together. If the parts arrive early enough I might even be able to get the car back to the owners before the weekend, but I doubt it.
On another note, while I was working I kept cutting my hands on the neatly machined surfaces. That may sound painful, but it's an everyday occurance. In fact at one point I didn't even know I'd cut my finger until my ratchet started slipping in my hand. I thought it was just oil at first. I cut myself so much I don't feel it anymore. I have many cuts and scrapes on my hands that I don't remember getting. My hands are getting scars without any cool stories to go along with them. Part of the job I guess.
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Latest reply: Oct 15, 1999
NUTS! and Bolts
Posted Oct 14, 1999
I finished two jobs at work today, the first was resealing the rear timing chain cover in a '96 Maxima. The latter was finishing reassembling my Camaro from the heater core incident.
It took a while, but the Camaro is done. The heater core is in place, is not leaking, and all the interior is back together. The speaker wires are back in place and the glovebox is no longer sitting behind the passenger seat. Funny thing is I have about a half a dozen screws and assorted brackets left over. I have no idea where they came from.
The Maxima was a longer job. I'm doing it on warranty so it only pays 11.9 hours. So far I have about 16 hours in it. I finished disassembling the front of the motor, resealed everything, and put it all back together. Many, many bolts, brackets and components. I got done and everything was in its place. I had NO bolts left over. This is why I prefer working on imports. Everything is simple and has a purpose. You don't end up having to dispose of incriminating parts.
HOWEVER! I finished putting the Max back together and started it. A little rattling is normal as the chain tensioners pump back up. After 15 minutes at idle and 20 minutes at 2000rpm it was still rattling. I ran it at 5000rpm for another minute. I took it on a test drive down the highway and back. The damn thing still rattles! I began disassembling it again. I had trouble with one of the tensioners, so I think it may be stuck down. Or I might have left one of the chain guides loose - I can't remember if I tightened it or not.
Mothers, don't let your sons grow up to be mechanics! The pay isn't worth the stress. Hell, it's barely worth the time involved.
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Latest reply: Oct 14, 1999
Beat an Engineer
Posted Oct 10, 1999
I installed a new heater core in my Camaro today. Or rather, I worked at it - I started yesterday afternoon (it was slow at work) and I'm still not completely done. I didn't know how big of a project it is to replace the heater core in a '70-81 Camaro with air conditioning.
The other day I smelled coolant, and checked under the passenger side dash (where heater cores usually leak). I leaned under the dash and propped myself up on my elbow... then noticed that my elbow was wet with coolant. I called Chevy and asked about a heater core, $65 and they'd have to order it. I called O'Reilly's, $25 and they had it in stock. I bought it at O'Reilly's and went to work.
I didn't realize you have to pull the inner fender. That's fine, it's rusted and I've wanted to replace is anyways. I called Chevy, it went out of production last year and they don't have any left. They suggest Wesco Classic Chevy, very nice people, $40 and they have it in stock (but it's used). I'm out of a car so I ask the used car manager at the dealership where I work if I can borrow a Ford Exploder until Saturday afternoon (today). He reluctanly agrees.
I pick up my part and get back to the dealership. It's late, so I do a little work then clean up and go home. I go to a class this morning about some new products at the dealership, and afterwards I go back to the dealership. I give the Exploder back to the manager and thank him. He gives me the same look as usual - like he just caught me pissing in his coffee.
I cursed more this afternoon than I have in a long time. Not only does the inner fender come out, you have to take all the bolts loose on the inside of the heater box. The crappy Chilton manual I have says to take loose all the bolts on the engine side (NOT TRUE!) and that you have to recover all the refigerant and remove the A/C lines (ALSO NOT TRUE!). I curse quite a bit more.
I finally wrestle the inner heater box free and spill more coolant onto the floorboard. I accidently yank several wires free under the dash. The is the end of a vacuum line laying on the floorboard and I don't know where it goes. You have to turn the heater box upside down which you cannot do with the control cables attached. There is not enough room to disconnect the control cables. I got them free finally and got it upside down. Then there are five more screws to get the heater core out. Then you have to separate it from a piece of plastic it is mounted to. And that's just getting it apart!
I spent about three hours re-installing the heater box, re-attaching the engine side of the system, installing the newly repainted slightly used fender, and hooking up the battery (which had to be removed to remove the inner fender).
The stuff under the dashboard is still scattered throughout the car. I'll put it back in Monday, or if I have too much work, Wednesday. I have never had this difficult a time replacing heater cores. Japanese cars RULE! There's a GM engineer out there somewhere who probably retired after making too much money building crappy A/C & Heater systems like that. He needs a retroactive beating.
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Latest reply: Oct 10, 1999
Clif's Wedding- Procrastination Pays in Spades
Posted Sep 27, 1999
When I went to pick up the '51 Chevy last weekend, I also went to my friend Clifton's wedding. I know Clif and Louann from school, so when they told me the wedding date I made plans to attend and also arranged with my friend Charley to pick up the car that weekend. Then Clif tells me he's having a LAN party on saturday and the wedding on monday. I arranged with Billy at work to borrow his dually and trailer. No problem, right? I plan on leaving early in the morning and being at Clifton's around noon.
Saturday morning comes around and I get a call from Greg from work who asks, "Are you borrowing Billy's trailer?"
"Yes."
"I didn't know he had a trailer that big. I need to pick some stuff up in Shawnee. Is it alright if I borrow it this morning before you leave?"
I do some mental re-planning "Sure."
"I'll have it back by noon."
Noon comes around and I head to the shop where I work to pick up the trailer. Billy's there and he says, "Greg loaded up and started back when he had a flat. He called about fifteen minutes ago and said it'll be about forty-five minutes before he can get back on the road."
About one-thirty Greg pulls up with the load of wood piled high on the trailer. He apologizes for being late, which isn't a problem because I'm damn glad it wasn't me having a flat down the road. I help him unload then back the dually up and attach the trailer.
I put twenty dollars in gas in the tanks and leave Edmond. About two hours later I roll into Okmulgee and pull up to Charley's house. We load the car onto the trailer and detach the dually. I pay for the car and leave the trailer. I'd pick up the title and trailer tuesday morning on my way back to town. I'm glad I have friends I can trust that much.
I put twenty more dollars in gas into the tank and leave for Sapulpa at four-thirty. An hour later I pull into Sapulpa and call Clifton from the Gas-n-Go. He drives into town and I follow him south further than anyone should live from town. I realize that we're almost in Mounds, which is about as small as a town can get and still inhabit a spot on the map. I know how to get to Mounds but Clif didn't think I could find my way, even though he was with me the last time I was there.
The LAN party is about half over when we get there. I plug my computer into the network and begin getting slaughtered at Quake3 and Quake2 Capture the Flag. It turns out that Clif's friend Earl belongs to one of the more prestigious Q2 CTF clans and has been practicing at Q3. I die a lot. I die some more. I get on a lucky streak and kill him about five times in a row. Then I die a lot more.
Sunday we drive to Norman to pick up Tammi, another friend for the wedding, who I could've picked up the day before if anybody had bothered to ask. Monday morning I am told that Clif and I need to smoke the brisquet for the wedding. Louann knows all there is to know about smoking brisquet, but is too busy. Clif is too busy, but he helps get the fire going. I spend all day tending the fire. The wedding is supposed to be a seven. At four Clif tells me we need to drive into Tulsa to get more chairs and can we use the truck since it'll hold more than his S-15 Jimmy? Sure, Billy won't mind.
We pick up Earl and a lot of chairs at TU. We drive over to Steve's so Clif and I can take showers. There is no running water at Clif's as the well and septic tank have not been installed in his recently purchased home. Steve also does not know the way to Clif's so he and Jennifer follow in his car. We are almost back in Sapulpa when Clif gets a page. His parents are at Gas-n-Go, Clif knows this because he recognizes the pay-phone's number which I had dialed two days before. At Gas-n-Go we get Clif's parents to follow us in one car, while the minister and his wife follow in another.
It is now just past seven, we are a train of four vehicles heading to Wal-Mart for last minute supplies. Clif, Earl, Steve, and I run into Wal-Mart, each of us in search of a different item. Using this loosely planned method we get everything we need in about fifteen minutes. When told I need to get dowel sticks I ask why.
"To make the signs pointing the way to the house."
"I think it's a little late for that Clif."
We check out and begin caravanning the rest of the way to Clif's. We get there at about seven forty-five. The bride is still wearing jeans and setting up. The brisquet is done and I haven't eaten all day. I can barely keep from salivating.
Clif says, "Oh yeah, you're the ring bearer. Tammy will hold the groom's ring and Earl will hold the bride's ring."
"Then why am I the ring bearer if they're holding the rings?"
"You stand there and hold the ring pillow."
I look at the ring pillow. It's pink and shaped like a heart. The lace also helps me make my decision. "No, thank you." The bride gripes me out later.
At eight thirty the wedding begins. It's a pretty short service, my job ends up being to videotape it. Afterwards we eat brisquet and other great food prepared by Tammi, who has a Culinary Arts degree.
Louann's grandmother approaches me and asks, "What kind of wood did you use to smoke this brisquet?"
"Hickory I think."
"No."
"Umm, we took a leaf off the hickory tree out there and pulled out all the wood from the brush pile that had that kind of leaf on it, but some blackjack may have gotten in there."
"Yep. It's not hickory. But it's good brisquet anyways."
I feel proud, it's my first smoked brisquet.
We pack the chairs back into the truck, put another twenty dollars in the tank in Sapulpa, and Earl and I head back to TU. We unload the chairs, Earl goes home, and I crash at Steve's at 2 am. The next morning I go to Okmulgee, get the car and the title and head for Edmond. I pull up to the shop at noon, weave through the gate and catch one of the trailer's tires on it, flattening the tire. I'm tired, hungry, the truck's tank is empty again, and I have to work the rest of the day.
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Latest reply: Sep 27, 1999
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