h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I’ve never done a journal entry before, Im not that sort of person really. But hey I thought, why not? The problem now being what should I put into it? What would people want to about me? There aint really that much to know, what have I done today? Not much, currently unemployed and looking carefully for a job so I just walk the dog and visit my friends in various shops, today I visited my friend in Bicester. The whole affair is quite pathetic (just like me). One interesting thing that happened was my dog (in some strange attempt to push me of the sofa) managed to give me a lovely scratch up my arm. Oh the excitement of it all indeed. Well there you have it people. My first and probably last journal entry, dated the 09/03/2004 at 16:26. enjoy.

if you don't write writing journal entries, then what made you write this one?

Hi Charlie, it's very good for a first attempt

Congratulations on your first journal thingymebob!!!

I didn't write one for a while when i first joined, but now i write stuff nearly all the time, mainly about rubbish

But I think i spend most of my time in peoples journals, chatting there

I think my last entry was about how i made a cup of tea....

Sorry about your scratch, Have you appied savlon?

I think the liberal aplication of an electrified cattle prod is probably more likely to prevent dog scratches

Noooo! don't hurt your cute lil' doggy!

Was that to me or Charlie, cus Charlie wouldn't hurt his cute lil' doggy. I'd hurt mine though, if I had to, which so far has only been once, but she's the Evil Satanic Hell Houd from Hell. Before you have a go at me for hurting my dog she was trying to bite through my hand at the time

yeah, i read that post...

That was weird, but i think you were justified.

you are right, i would never attack my dog with an electirc cattle prod....

i have no idea why i suddenly decided to write a journal entry, mayeb you should ask a phsicologist, im sure i have many phsicological problems that explain it! (look! i think i even spelt them write! did i ? oh actually maybe no.....)

Use spellcheck.

usually i spell it so funny it doesnt recognise it....

Psychological problems are dealt with by a psychologist

Or by repeated watchings of Frasier.

prehaps........

You watch it, and when somebody on the show has a problem that's similar to your own then you listen to what he says and do it. You'll finds it's much cheaper than going to a psychatrist.

if you say now......

*comes in with a clipboard*

now what seems to be the problem?

I am surrounded by handsome men and cant choose

no, wait, i have written a journal entry and dont know why, yes thats it

*rolls her eyes*

hmm....... well for the second option i suggest creating a complex explanantion yourself, prehaps one which involves swallows, wingspans and coconuts migrating

*considers this*

Hmm, well what about the first one tho?