h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That all politicians and political candidates should dress in MIME regila, and should MIME their platforms! Begining with ICARUS!

da Baron
A goldfish in every pocket!

Hmm...let me think...No. Actually, yes, but only if you dress up in one of the outfits David Bowie wore in "Labyrinth", take a picture of it, send it to Shazz, and...never mind. Still no.

Aren't mime artists a wonderful thing. I love them I really do, there should be a mime artist on every street corner

Don't encourage him!!

DID YOU SAY MIME?!?! Yeah yeah yeah! I wanna mime I wanna mime!!!!!!!!!!! look:

*fenchurch is miming*

Whaddaya think?

A mime is a terrible thing to waste

3

Yes! I think an ARMY of ZOMBIE MIMES is what London needs! Fenchurch can be their Generalissimo (or should that be Generalissima? Yes, I beleve the latter will save me lots of groveling...)!

Of course, Fenny, we'll have to keep at least a division of our Zombie Mimes around the old silo, just for our protection from Merkin's "advisors" and whatnot. The good thing is that they're Zombies, so we won't have to feed them...

da Baron
A goldfish in every pocket...

Oy!! Baron Shatturday!! NO!!!

Oh yes. Tee hee. What a funny pun. Never heard that before.

And don't encourage him.

Whats wrong Icky????....anyone would think you didn't like mimes...I think that could count against you when it comes to the vote, knowing that you will discriminate against a section of society...tut tut tut...

They scare me. Them, and clowns. And The Baron's idea of Evil Zombie Mimes isn't helping either.

Shorty... what's the weather like in the glorious North...?

Icky, you'll play hell if I'm elected! I've already got "send all politicians to clown-college" down as part of my manifesto... The first one's sent, of course, will be the losers in this election!

You don't like my Zombie Mimes? But they're EVER so much fun! You should see them, led by their captain, Marcelle Marceu, miming their way about the parade-ground... Bumping into invisible walls, crawling beneath invisible barbed-wire, shooting each other with invisible guns!



da Baron
A goldfish in every pocket!

Just out of curiosity, and don't take any offense, but I have to know: Are you completely out of your mind? A simple yes or no will suffice.

You mean you DON'T already KNOW?! Obviously you haven't the slightest idea about your future Vice Mayor's mental state!

Should I sic the zombies on his arse, Baron?

I already know the answer. I just want to hear it from him. And is that a threat, Fenny? I expect such low behavior from the Baron, but from you, that hurts. I.C.A.R.U.S. members are held to a higher standard than others, and mayoral candidates a higher standard than that. You should be on your best behavior.

But icarus, this is politics, no time for kidd gloves when people are grasping for power. Friendships come second in poiltics...

Well, there's that and the fact that threatening the life of a mayoral candidate could cause a massive scandal, thus utterly destroying your chances of election and subsequently creating an opening for your opponent to step into, thus making their mayorship an almost absolute certainty. Or something like that.

Aw! None of that has hurt Bill Clinton, yet!

And when my army of crack-smoking zombie-mimes get's through with your neighborhood, you'll wonder what ever you did without them! You go out your door, and there's a friendly zombie-mime- smoking a bit of crack, and cleaning the street! There's one on the corner, directing traffic! There comes the Mayor, and the town council, in full clown-drag!

It's a brave new world, Icky, and you're a part of it! Just think how much fun you'll be having in clown-college! Learning how to fit into one of those TINY little cars with about 50 other clowns! Learning how to take a bottle of seltzer in the face like a REAL MAN!
All the while accompanied by your friends and classmates, all dressed in their lovely clown-suits and makeup!

Yes! And for you- we'll provide an extra-special treat! Your own crack-pipe, and MIME TRAINING! YES! You'll be sent over to Frogland, to learn miming at the feet of my zombie-captain, Marcelle Marceau!

So you just keep smoking your crack, little soldier! And hang on! Soon you'll be polished in the arts of clowning and miming beyond any mother's dream!

da Baron
A goldfish in every pocket!

OOOEEEERRR! What on EARTH is going on in here!
shazz