h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

When did he do his back, he never tells me anything. And you don't have to tell me about the pint pot, I was there on the evening in question.

no I was talking to EV - he and Sid are trying everything to make me confess!

He did it at karate about a week ago - and he is not ignoring you by the way. He is ill with flu at the minute.

Did it at Karate and has flu? Is that kung-flu?

So the injury is nothing to do with the now almost legendary pint pot?

Vestboy!!!!!!! *flings her arms round his neck* oh how I have missed you!!!! Have you heard about my mouse?

MAybe we could call Lochy's mouse Arfur Quart after the pint pot scandal.

Bastard, that made me laugh. Have to have more painkillers now.

poor Menzarse had an accident with a cat and a lot of milk - mind you I hear they have booked him for next year's Royal Variety Performance!

Menzarse or the cat?

both - but naturally the cat has got top billing

Whilst my triple back summersault was quite amazing I think the show stealer will be the cat just sitting there trying to catch the milk as it drips off his whiskers.

Naturally. And the Milk comes before Menzarse as well.
I'd like to see Bob Monkhouse announce the act with the Queen in the Royal Box.

If you dont mind, I'd rather not repeat the events of last night. I was luck that I didn't have an audience the first time round. Anyhow...

BOING.....Time for bed.

Bed - what a wonderful thought ..... hmmmmm

Sorry about the Zedidy impression, twas a bit lame.

I thought it was quite convincing - ever thought of going on Stars in their Eyes?

Only if someone hits me with a large mallet.

*ducks just in case*

you want to be hit by Timmy Mallet - sometimes I really worry about you!

The mallet was made of foam, so there's no problem.

So was Timmy Mallett.