h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yes please Sid (if they're that potent I won't ask) just the one though I have to be going shortly. Though I could fancy muffin - any chance of one???

Who said that?

This Black Kidney Bean thing must be quite strong, because I'm now very confused.

Hi Mr Universal what ever your name is
And hello again fond pals.
I was right things are rapidly going downhill this afternoon.
Can you mix me a special Sid.

You better make that two - blimey what a mess!

The Milky Bars Are On Me!!

Right!, to clear up the confusion, Mr Universal is.......none other than my brother who is currently working (and I use that term lightly) in Germany. It would appear that he's sust who I am, and is trying to play games with me...Why-I-Ordda...Wait till I get you home!!

ooooh a fight - hold on I will see if I can flog Sky the rights for Pay per View!

Well hello Mr Universe do come in and have a drink. Mind the puke in the corner, I'll get that cleaned up in minute. (Sorry about the Shag pile Sid).

Soooooo very nice to meet you, any brother of Sid's is a brother or ours. And What do you do for a living then? Another desparate IT bod are you???

Generaly he's a nice chap, apart from his bright ginger hair!*tee-hee-hee*

(Please note that this is not a reference to all ginger people, only the one who calles himself the U.P.I)

Which one of you is the Noel of the relationship, and which is the Liam?

Which is the Richard Dimbleby and which one is the David?

Mmmmm.... Well he's the younger one, and the more intelligent, so I guess that makes him Liam.

Still, his Germans not as good as it could be, and from what I here, he's shacked up with two ladies on the wrong side of forty,...sort of a german Ab-Fab sitcom...

So you are the one with the talent then?

Hello all. It's nice to meet you. Yes, I am ginger - but don't hold that against me!! So my BIG bro' is quite a superstar around these parts then? Its good to hear. But don't let him tell you he's an IT bod - for 'tis I that has that honour. Right now, I am in Germany, working for the German Institute of Space travel - cool huh! But its nice to come to Paul's bar... so I think I'll sit down, and have a drink.

Mine's a Southern Comfort & Coke, Bitte Bro.

I had a blazing argument with Liam once!

Go on!

Shouldn't you be working Bro? I didn't install that modem for you to play all day!!! (he says, sat NOT working himself in Germany!!!)

Well it was before Noel joined the band and they were playing our Student's Union. They were crap - think Five and make it ten times worse and I felt obliged to avail of this fact. So I told them what I thought and stomped off to the bar. When they had finished a set that frankly Pete Waterman would have rejected as being abysmal, Liam came over and started to give me a piece of his mind complete with words which being bought up rather then dragged up I had barely heard before!

Details! We want details!

So you won't be replacing Bonehead or Guigsy then?

well it nearly came to blows - and we had to be seperated. I think the last thing I said was "It will be a miracle if you ever make a career out of that shite!" (I was learning fast). Yes - how wrong could I have been?