h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Arnia!! Stop tempting us all!! NM is in enough trouble as it is!
shazzPRME

Now, wait a minute!!! How am I in trouble, *this time*!!!!

NM

If you have to ask you do not want to knoe my friend.

Thanks for the advice, Marv!!!!

*NM skulks out quietly, in hopes of not being noticed!*

NM

Ahah! So there you are NM!! You haven't spoken to me in ages! Are you scared of something?!
shazzPRME

You need C3 clearance to access Area 51. Sorry, local joke.

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Actually, I understood Marv's.

'Nonnie

Hexidecimal -- base 16 Digits 0-9 and A-F

sixteens | ones
   2     |  A (ten)    : 32 + 10 = 42
   2     |  B (eleven) : 32 + 11 = 43

(why does she keep posting late to forgotten threads? -- because it's fun and I'm 3 sheets to the wind (sleep deprivation) and... uhm.. that's enough excuses. )

'Nonnie

Vampire bats... *starts singing*

WIZARD's STAFF - Version Primus Dot The Absence of Things Alpha

by George Anketell.

(Chorus.)
A wizard's staff has a knob on the end,
knob on the end, knob on the end
A wizard's staff has a knob on the ennndddd!
What he does with it is magic!

A wizard's staff has a knob on the end
And runes run up the shaft
It's long and proud and stiff and loud
It's the pride of wizardcraft.

(Chorus.)

A wizard's staff has a knob on the end
Some are made from thinking wood
With a sapient pair you'd be out to there
And you'd go blind, yes you would.

(Chorus.)

A wizard's staff has a knob on the end
That looks like a silver nut
If you start to bleat when he's taken your seat
He'll crack it up your butt.

(Chorus.)

A wizard's staff has a knob on the end
And the odd frog knows it's true
When your staff has a bend then the spell you send
Can fly right back at you.

(Chorus)

(Under Construction)

A wizard's staff has a knob on the end
Most useful if they knew it
It's just that fem isn't magical to them
So they never ever do it.

(Chorus)

(last verse maestro please)
A wizard's staff has a knob on the end
And you may think it's tragic
That no matter how strong or thick or long
All he can do with it is magic.

(Chorus)

*changes song*

THE WIZARD'S LAMENT
or
The House of the Mended Drum

--------------------------------------------
There is a pub in Ankh-Morpork
They call the Mended Drum
And it's been the start of many a poor boy
And, Gods, I know I'm one.

My Father was a fighting man
He stomped his enemies flat.
My mother was a working girl
Who came from cold Sto Lat.

Now my father, he had downed a few
Then said, "Let's have some fun."
And all night they shook the floorboards loose
Upstairs in the Mended Drum.

At dawn he went down to light a fag
Twelve crossbows were aimed at him
He lost his life to the city guard
For malicious lingering.

Now my mother did not cry at all
For she was unaware
That inside her woking lady's womb
A baby she did bear.

When nine months, they had come and gone
My mother did give birth
She asked her friend, the sausage man
"What's this snapper worth?"

Now the greedy sot was tempted
And did some research fine.
But for the family holdings
Dear dad was eigth in line.

What little he would get, of course,
Was sure to never be mine
For ahead of this poor bastard son
Were seven brothers fine.

Now it did not take my mother long
To see what she could reap
So came the morning Modo found a babe
On top his compost heap.

So here I sit upon my stool
And to the barman I do confide
With my pint of scumble at my hand
And an ape perched by my side.

But Death, I see him coming for me
My life he plans to claim
I know I'll never last tll morn'
And this pub will be the same.

So tonite before I leave I swear
A keg, I'll finish one!
And end my days where they began
In that pub called the Mended Drum.

*bows and sits in the corner with the cabbages*

Very good, Arnia!!! You must have *way* too much time on your hands!


Shazz.....I have not been avoiding you!.....I've been spending a massive amount of time under Monsys' Dart, and so I have had little time for the 'puter. I get on just long enough to take care of business, and then it's outside staring up at a crankcase!


It's done now, so maybe I'll have a little more time on here!

NM

OK That's fair enough then... are you sure that it was just Monsy's Dart you were under though?!
I guess that I haven't been around that much when you are about either... so we are as bad as eachother
shazzPRME

Well, Monsys' Dart is back up and running, and you are about settled in Holland(I hope). Maybe things will get back a little closer to "normal" now!

NM

I am *sure* that using the word Normal to describe what any of us do here is not only blasphmey, but dangerous. God Almighty might look on us and throw some lightning our way

He-he! Thats' the reason for the quotation marks around it! I don't think I've run into anyone here who is totally normal. It makes me feel better about being "Fairly Strange"!

NM

... and certainly helps with the *NM* tag!! Normal Man??? nah! ROFL!
shazzPRME

That's about as far from a correct "guess" as you can get!.....but then, you already know that!!!LOL

NM

But does 6 times 9 equal 42 in hex? No. It's a different basis.

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Look! It's 6.45 a.m., I've been logged on to h2g2 since 5.00 a.m. and just who are you calling "not normal"?

Sad git, maybe but I happen to think I'm perfectly normal (at least that's what I tell my family as I serve them burned dinners, coz I've been playing on h2g2 again!)

He-he!!! I think of myself as perfectly normal.......it just doesn't seem that anyone else agrees with that belief!!LOL

NM

I am most definitely normal... every sane man drinks metallic hydrogen and sings Discworld songs