h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

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I would. I trust David will have more dignity than to respond to the attack on him.


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that's up to you, of course. Attila's already done the only thing I'd consider doing and told the attention-seeker nobody's listening.

'Sno good getting snotty, snub the snappish snake.

goodnight all

Hello H,

Had another chat with producer of WoM today - I asked him to take out my message board proverb (the first one) - "Post in haste, repent at leisure" - he was very understanding when I explained why. It wouldn't necessarily make anything flare up again but I'd rather not take my chances. There have been a lot of deletions (you've probably given up looking at the board in its current state!!) but from those that remain, after making a joke about nay-missus, he said something about my having been banned at some point. I am still chuckling at that one!!

Must dash - will try to look in again later.

Mimi

Good evening all

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It's in a bad way, isn't it? I have tried to join in uncontaminated threads but the best thing to do with the m-r business is to wait for it to run out of steam. I'm certainly not going to stoke the boiler. I thought for a while it might be Aletheia reborn but it can't be because (s)he'd have come after me before now. I don't know the background to m-r's stuff but there's a clear sign of mental disturbance in that (s)he seems to overlook the fact that people can't read her/his mind. Did you know that you were part of a conspiracy to get m-r's posts removed? It's in message 1 of the 'no discussion title' thread that was posted 6 hours ago. I saw it before it was hidden and it names several conspirators including you & Jean and with special someone as the shadowy mastermind behind the plot to silence m-r. Bizarre stuff.

I see Steven Gerrard had to rescue England again tonight. I only got it through 5 live but the performance in the first half sounded abysmal. From what I heard England didn't deserve to win 3-0 although Andorra certainly deserved to lose at least 3-0!

back later (if anyone else is!)

H

Evening everyone!
I'm on holiday at last!
Cheers!
Best bit is what I love doing every Friday - changing the alarm to give me a lie-in!
Easter soon:http://www.e-motional.com/images/hopping%20rabbit%20-%20animated.gif
I bought my class breadsticks and green grapes for a breaktime treat since we're supposed to be promoting healthy eating! Bet they wouldn't have objected to chocolate but they did enjoy them.
No Easter egg smileys - the closest is !!!

Bye for now,
Jane
xx

Good evening all

You seem happy MJ. Is it Easter already? Are you going anywhere? Don't be lying-in too late; it's bad for you. Do you remember that sandwich board man who walked up and down Oxford Street every day for decades? I think he died 10-15 years ago. His board warned against the dangers of a surfeit of protein and told us all to avoid "Meat, fish, fowl, milk, eggs....AND SITTING". I think he had a little booklet that you could have in return for a small donation and I really regret not picking one up as a memento of a genuine dedicated eccentric. All in all a better class of nutter than you get on the Radio 4 boards!

Did you get paid today or were your salaries caught up in the BACs go slow? Mine was in on time, which is lucky because I should probably go to my building society tomorrow and put something in my ISA before then end of the financial year. You never know, I might need my full allowance next year!

In case anyone's interested, 'Farewell my Lovely' is on BBC7 tomorrow: 12 noon and 0100 Sunday (though, if you remember, the advertised late night broadcast of 'The Big Sleep' never happened last week). I'm sure I've told you this before but 'Farewell my Lovely' is full of brilliant lines like “It was a blonde. A blonde to make a bishop kick a hole in a stained glass window” and "He was a big man but no taller than 6ft 5in and no wider than a beer truck". Great stuff.

bye for now

H

Hello H and MJ,

I'm (finally) on holiday too, MJ (last dance school lessons this morning) - just as well, feel shattered! I do have a bit of paperwork to do over the holiday but not much). Went out for a meal last night with my year group staff to say goodbye to the student teacher who has been working with us - she is only 20 but is really good, a natural, and the kids loved her.

The last week at school was turned over mainly to art - my year group traditionally represents the school at the Children's Parade that opens the May Festival. The whole class had to make mouse papier mache hats, so I was up to my elbows in PVA glue and paper - they looked good, tho. Here's a riddle for you - the theme of the parade is Inventions and my school is representing ... what? The main structure being carried in the middle is Planet Earth.

Very glad to see things have simmered down a bit on WoM - wonder how long for? nay-missus' last message said it was 'not the end of it'.

Anyone going away for Easter?

Mimi

>>>the theme of the parade is Inventions and my school is representing ... what?

Surely not mousetraps?

Good evening all

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Are you making a wicker man, then?

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I.T.?

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Not long, it seems. Who is 'once banned Mimi'?

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I'm tempted but I expect I'll just stay here. I've already got two trips to London to make next month because as well as my concert society trip there's almost certainly going to be a leaving do for our financial director who's moving on after six years. It might not seem that long but the company's only been going for about eleven years and when she joined there were only five of us (more like twenty five now). I don't usually go to staff parties but I'll make an exception for this one.

bye for now

H

Hi H,

You were very close with your guess - to be exact, it is the World Wide Web - I thought there should be a giant spider crawling over the globe and I thought the mice reference might throw you! The structures are made from something caled wiccy - no idea how it's spelt but they use it in gardening, very bendy long sticks - so not quite the wicker man, but also close!!

Still having some fun on WoM but going out now - back later.

Mimi

Good evening all

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Whoopee! Is there a prize? You should be in a good mood, Mimi, as the Hammers managed to win yesterday. Are you going away over Easter btw; or maybe just to London to see Mum. I believe public transport is now in crisis since the lunatics gave free bus passes to all schoolchildren. I can't see how they expect this to work. Surely it will cause a significant number of people to use their cars when they wouldn't otherwise have done so.

Did you listen to 'Die Aegyptische Helena' yesterday, MJ. I'd never heard it before and I thought it was most enjoyable. Tomorrow afternoon there is Act 1 of Tristan und Isolde with John Treleaven and Christine Brewer, conducted by Donald Runnicles. Acts II & III follow on Tuesday & Wednesday afternoons. If my CD of Runnicles & Brewer doing the Prelude & Liebestod is anything to go by this should be worth listening to.


bye for now

H

Hello Hue lot!

>>>Did you listen to 'Die Aegyptische Helena' yesterday, MJ.

Sorry H, I did listen to the first 10 mins or so then turned it off...perhaps I should have given it longer. Feel rather bad now that I didn't give it much of a chance! (Might have guessed you'd ask me...) Maybe it's because I'm not really much attracted to the German language. Schubert and Schumann can persuade me to listen and so can a few German operas but Richard Strauss isn't my (You'll probably remind me of something I posted months ago now saying how much I enjoyed something by him!)

Goodnight!
Jane
xxx

Good morning all

I wrote this last night but the system was down

Hi MJ

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You're safe. I can't remember your raving about anything of RS's. The only German opera I remember getting a glowing review from you was 'Hänsel und Gretel'. I caught up with the ROH 'Siegfried' today and enjoyed it very much. I'm not a fan of John Treleaven but I thought his performance was workmanlike. Then there was Tomlinson as the Wanderer - impressive as usual. There was a scary dragon and a convincing bear. Something I've always wondered is, given Wagner's fondness for Shakespeare, how likely is it that the famous 'Winter's Tale' stage direction "exit, pursued by a bear" is reflected in Siegfried's first entrance...preceded by a bear.

goodnight all

Good morning, HtoHe et al.

<<... how likely is it that the famous 'Winter's Tale' stage direction "exit, pursued by a bear" is reflected in Siegfried's first entrance...preceded by a bear.>>

Reflected indeed ! I am tempted to say "Trust Wagner to get it back to front" but I shall try to resist it.

Mention of bears always reminds me of a Budd Neill cartoon many years ago in the 'Evening Times' of Glasgow. It depicted one of his characteristic dumpy women leaving Calderpaek Zoo with a small boy and explaining to him
"Na. Na. Sonny. The lions wi' the spots wusna berrs, they wus tigers. The berrs wus the strippet wans."

MJ told you that Richard Strauss was not her cup of tea but you may recall that I enthused about a production of 'Der Rozenkavalier' in Edinburgh. I also enjoy his 'Four Last Songs' though I do not now wallow in them as I did last year.

I came across a crit. on, I think, a Belgian web-site of a DG DVD of 'Der Rozenkavalier' as the line up was

Felicity Lott, Kurt Moll, Anne Sofie von Otter, Barbara Bonney
Chor und Orchester der Wiener Staatsoper

I tried the auto-translation to see what they thought of it and got this:-

"Confidence in the magic association of Carlos Kleiber and Richard Strauss had led the DG to leave in a few years two poured in video of the Knight in the Rose due to the same director. Unfortunately, the editor did not make the best choice. But it is true that in 2001, the names of Felicity Lott, Barbara Bonney and Anne Sofie von Otter have a greater commercial value than the association of the names of Gwyneth Jones, Lucia Popp and Brigitte Fassbaender. However, these last had polished their interpretation with the length of many seasons. Surrounded by old lorry drivers of the Theater National of Munich and guided by an irresistible Carlos Kleiber, they had carried out a version of dream (ref. Médiathèque ES7811). In the second version, recorded in Wiener Staatsoper, one gains certainly an orchestra Viennese, the orchestra broken best with this music. But what can of the singers, even excellent, drowned in a representation of routine where the director put himself to the absent subscriberes. Fortunately, there remains the music, been useful royally, and the direction, lives, alert, but also in charge of tenderness of Carlos Kleiber."

I'll have to go back and try to read the French to try and make sense of such things as "old lorry drivers of the Theater National of Munich".

In reply to your question some days ago about who was going away for Easter, I shall be inspecting the flat my grand-daughters bought in London a few months ago. One of them will be elsewhere on holiday which will make it easier to accommodate my daughter and me. Im going on Wednesday for a week. We are planning to go to one of the Easter Day services at St Paul's. I've forgotten what the music is to be at the one my daughter has chosen but I remember it sounded attractive. I'll let you know what it was when I return.

It is no longer morning and lunch calls.

Douglas

Hello H,

Yes, I am very happy about the Hammers' latest win (and surprised... but I shouldn't say that!) - real nail-biting tension at the end of this season.

Now, your prize ... I'll have to think about that. An Easter bunny made of licorice? No, sounds dangerous!!

I'm not going away over the holiday - planning on going to London on Wednesday - hey, there's a synchronicity with Douglas!

'Bye for now,

Love,
Mimi
xxxx

Good evening all

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Hmm…you managed to resist with the same ease I have in resisting liquorice!

I do remember your expressing a fondness for ‘Rosenkavalier’ and ‘Vier Letzte Lieder’, Douglas. I’d have thought ‘Capriccio’ would be up your street, too. You won’t be surprised to learn that I prefer ‘Salome’, ‘Elektra’ and the sumptuous, if flawed, ‘Die Frau ohne Schatten’. Do none of you like the orchestral works – ‘Till Eulenspiegel’, ‘Also Sprach Zarathustra’, horn concertos etc?

Those translation utilities are a laugh, aren’t they? I might already have told you that we used to have competitions at work to see who could get the most hilarious translation out of Babel Fish. They are useful, though, if you have huge blocks of text to translate and aren’t very good at typing. For all their outrageous errors the bulk of the translation will be accurate so you can just paste it out and edit. You have to be careful not to leave any of the nonsense in, though.

I hope you enjoy your trip to London. Which part of the metropolis are you visiting? If it’s near St Paul’s you must have some seriously wealthy grand-daughters.

I see your pal is back on WoM, Mimi. Are you sure this isn’t Aletheia? The mixture of pomposity and paranoia seems very familiar. Mind you, I suppose it’s not that unusual on some other boards; we’re just not used to it on WoM.

I’m going to make a cup of tea now and catch the last episode of ‘Tinker Tailor’. I know exactly what’s going to happen but the acting’s a treat to watch.

bye for now

H

>>>Do none of you like the orchestral works – ‘Till Eulenspiegel’, ‘Also Sprach Zarathustra’, horn concertos etc?

Yes, I mean no, I do like - and isn't there a nice oboey one too? No German language audible - that's why they're so palatable!!!

Night night,

MJ (exhausted from gardening - red cheeks, broken nails)

PS Loved the "old lorry drivers" Douglas!

How about this one then. After my Baltic cruise in 2004, I was googling 'Neva' and 'barrage' to try to find out about the abandoned barrage across the estuary downstream from Kronstadt and I found a French site about cruises from St Petersburg to Moscow, barrages in this case referred to dams on the way, and this is the auto-translation of some of what they had to say about St Petersburg.

"The Cathedral Pierre and Paul s?impose with the glance, by its richness baroque. Dominating St Petersbourg of its gilded arrow of 122 m, it is the masterly concretization of the dreams of Pierre the Large one. In the imperial crypt rest thirty tsars, tsarina and Large-Dukes, of Pierre the Large one with Alexandre III."


"Visit museum of l?Ermitage, one does not present it more: with three d?oeuvres million, this museum is undoubtedly l?un more famous world. One less on the other hand knows l?histoire and the beauty of the walls qu?il locks up: this Palate d?hiver where followed one another jusqu?à Nicolas II, Tsars and Architects. Built of 1754 to 1762 by Bartoloméo Rastrelli, this palate of square plan, confined houses, is organized around d?une enormous court in the shape of Greek cross.
Ordered by Elisabeth, girl of Pierre I, and built within Bartolomeo Rastrelli, it remained the residence of the tsars jusqu?en 1917. This building green baroque pale, decorated colonnades, pediments, mouldings and crowned statues, covers a surface of 9 hectares.
Sixty thousand works of the Masters of the largest schools of the world are exposed in 400 parts. Certain rooms, sumptuously decorated, mix furniture, the d?art objects, the sculpture and painting, and reserve their windows from superb points of view on Neva or the Place of the Palate; in the center of which s?élève l?immense Column Alexandre: 47 m of pink granite set up in 1834 to commemorate the Russian victory over Napoleon."

I can't think why French words and phrases with apostrophes have been left untranslated but with the apostrophes replaced by question marks.

I can. In the original text, they will have been represented not by the bog-standard apostrophe (ASCII code 39) but by the character "right single quote" which is not part of ASCII. The translation utility is not savvy about them and has therefore passed the text through verbatim; but the result generates a character that your browser doesn't understand, so it puts in a ? character.

Cheers
James

Thanks for the explanation, James.

The outcome of the process adds to the 'charm' of the translation.

Douglas

I found this in an e-mail from Hallmark. It may amuse you, MJ, and your family.
I had been hoping that I could paste this in as a link that you could click on directly but it didn't work on preview so I have disabled it as a link but try pasting it into 'Word', remove the spaces and then paste that into the address bar of your browser. There may be an easier way but that is the only way I could get it to work from preview.

h t t p://www.hallmark.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/
ArticleView?pageName=%2FHallmarkSite%2FGoldCrownStores%2FBUNNY_
VIDEO&storeId=10001&mailID=BAE_E_CBO_040307C_V2_SpringQuartet_
NA&tabOn=stores&campaign=BAE_E_CBO_040307C_V2_SpringQuartet_
NA&catalogId=10051

Douglas