h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm not worth it.
Time to put an end to this waste and let the real me deal with the problem.

We're here if you need us.

Seconded...

... and curious about the real person behind this varied name tag on hootoo...

You can find a meaning in all the names I have used one way or another.

Sometime ago what was left og my sense of humour died. I think it was shortly after my will to fight collapsed.
I'm going nowhere. CBT is wasted on me, the drugs just help me avoid the problem.
i don't know who I am I don't know what I want, I'm in a boat without a rudder singing nursery rhymes hoping the ocean will go away.
I am programmed to fail, set to self-destruct.
I don't have what it takes to change from within so I am now falling towards the point where my hate for myself will be released alomost in full.
I will stop the CBT.
I will stop the drugs.
I will meet the real me and he will deal with the problem.

Amusing and informative in a sense...
http://www.weakgame.com/media_10383_Animation_vs_Animator.html

I was really pleased to see this link...
http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2003/02/28/1046407753895.html

And this one has been floating about as folk may have seen...
http://www.biota.org/people/douglasadams/


If I can't help myself with all the support I've been given then it's just better to let go.

Hi. I've been feeling like that with the CFS for the past few weeks, having had something of a relapse. All sort of, 'trying gets me nowhere.' (I seem to be coming out the other side, though.)

The way you are talking now reminds me of certain people I've known whose SSRI-related medication had a dodgy effect on them. I don't recall what you're taking or how long you've been taking it, but is there a chance that it is your pills that are making you more depressed and hopeless? Certain brands can have the opposite effect on certain people; Prozac, for instance, has made a lot of people suicidal.

If you do give up your medication, please, please come off it gradually! Coming off anti-depressants suddenly can result in some nasty side-effects. I speak from experience here. I'm talking horrible nightmares, hallucinations, vertigo, confusion, and hormone imbalances. It's your life, but I do recommend coming off them with help from your doctor.

And, good luck.

Going with the drug theory...
I'm on Seroquel [antipsychotic], verapamil [beta/calcuim channel blocker] and Lorazepam [benzodiazepine family].
Verapamil I take for anxiety/palpatations and the effect my last attept at embracing Ms Death had on my heart.
Lorazepam, lovely stuff. I'm not addicted to it, I've never taken large enough amouunts regularly enough for a genuine addiction. Am more dependent on it than I should be. It's not beyond possibility that the drug could be having a negative affect on my motivation, I don't thing it's at all central to it though.
Seroquel. Been on it some time now. It's been good to me. May have been on it too long, wouldn't be the first medication for me to stop getting the benefits from I once did after time. Effexor being an example. I was on well above guideline amounts for both of those to begin with.
I'm now on just 800mg a day not a 1000mg.

Don't get me started on paroxwtine.
I was on paroxetine twice - the first time it caused manic highs and selfharming lows, the second time it caused selfharming "highs" and suicidal lows.
They tested it on school kids -> Dead school kids -> Still on the market. -> $$$.

:::

Jack Off Jill 'Fear Of Dying'
Audioslave 'Cochise'
A Perfect Circle 'The Outsider'

:::

I feel like I'm a korn lyric cliche.

Seroquel- seems to do you good?
Betablocker shouldn't be a problem.
Lorazepam - the way you describe it makes it sound a little dodgy... but as an emergency survival tool, it's probably good to use, unless it becomes a daily need?

Be careful on coming off any medication, as Snailie said.


Many s

Sounds like you're aware of the benefits and downsides of medication. What a lot of pills you have to take! In light of your approval of some of them, will you be staying on some and coming off others?

I suppose coming off them one at a time might be helpful in showing which ones are still providing a benefit... Sorry if I'm stating the bleedin' obvious, or don't know what I'm bleedin' talking about.

I don't know what is the meds or what's me and what's the devil at my ear.

I want someoneto pick me up and slap me and set me down facing the right direction and shout 'Walk!'.

It's tremendously difficult having to sort out an illness all on your own, isn't it.

I take a lot less pills than I used to. I was on antipsychotics, antidepressents, mood stabilisers, betablockers and lorazepam and lipase inhibitors.
And still managed to be a damn sight more ƒµçK'd up than I remember, was even aware of.


"I'm a terrible person, but at least I have the decency to feel bad about it."

Who's the quote from?

It's more of paraphrase and I can't quite recall where from. It may have been a sarcasstic put down...

Reminds me of a vegetarian friend of mine, who once said, "I do eat fish, but I feel suitably guilty about it afterwards."

Whereas, I tear into a some dead cow and feel suitably contented afterwards.
I've heard said that the human diet is meant to be roughly 20% meat and plant. I'm closer to a neaderthal diet which is the otherway round.

recon I vary between a 50/50 meat/veg to about 30/70 Meat/veg well, pressuming bread and cheese counts as veg