h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

then perhaps this is where your problem lays love. You do need to consider yourself as serious. To consider suicide, whether you meant it or not, is serious.

What about not seeing a phsyc, but a counsellor instead?

seen 2 of them. I think part of the problem is that everything with me is so...erm...extreme? Im not sure. I mean Im suicidal all the flipping time and whilst Im on a constant suicide alert from the gp, he still only sees me once a fortnight because hes got used to it. I mean it gets a bit annoying when every time you ask someone how they are they say "suicidal and depressed". I dont want to admit that theres anything wrong with me. I mean half the time I really and truly DO believe that theres nothing wrong with me. I guess that part of it is because Ive lived with it for so long and whilst Ive been cutting myself since I was 11, suicidal since I was...13...its just become something almost normal and everyday I guess. Does that make any sense?

Oh of course Ive got my psychologist too...

in a way, yes it does make sense. What you're feeling is quite natural. Like, right now, I don't feel as if there is anything wrong with me, but I wouldn't like to come off the medication for fear of what will happen

Whereas I continually buck against meds and then grasp for them. The fact that I was put on SUCH a low dosage and it was never changed despite the fact it obviously didnt work...sort of...Im not sure. It made me feel that they were just humouring me or something you know? And of course when Im paranoid I think that theyre bad for me, or are a placebo or something. When Im hyper I dont think I need them because Im hunkydory, and when Im depressed I cant be bothered to try and get any better...oh i dont know whatever forget it it doesnt matter. I dont know why youd be interested forget it

it's a case of catch 22 sometimes

Listen...I need to log off now....I'll be in w*rk on Monday morning...I'll send you a message from here.

You will take good care of yourself won't you.

catch you monday

thanks

*coughs*

Are you still participating with the assassins? Its my job to review the members list you see.

I never really did anything with that....ooops....In fact, I forgot all about it!

And this is why we have so few active members!

Anyways how are you doing? What you up to? Im writing an article on Bipolar disorder because Ive found that the ones already in the guide, whilst good, arent really all THAT complete.
So my test page "wodge" is being filled with a flowing, wonderful article

I'm in that unfortunate stage of being both depressed and hyper which is why i decided now was a good time to finally write the article because its now that i tend to do daft things.

Sorry Kat!! I didn't see you there!!!

Works been driving me crazy, and coupled with the fact that I'm in the throws of saying goodbye to a friend who is (hopefully temporarily) leaving hootoo......

I noticed that but couldnt really work out whats going on

Whats going on at work? My dads about to hand in his notice so I know all about work driving one crazy.

I've got a ton of invoices to sort out into date order....and trust me...there's a LOT!!!

so why are you on here then!?

I do need some sort of saneness to keep me from going

*explodes* theres a sodding sodding article on bipolar disorder already in peer review and mines going to be sodding better and more detailed but that one will get in the guide *SCOWLS*

well...have a go at it yourself....just because there is something going through at the moment, doesn't mean you can't do anything....

....have you tried to approach the writer about doing a collaborative entry?

*looks sulky* i dont want to...i want to do it all on my own...sorry im like that. I just want to present something and have people go "oh thats great!" or "oh thats crap" and then do something about it.

besides...mine'll be better...of course No the one going through currently IS very good. Im just in a particularly bad mood

Oh hunny

well its all stupid and pointless really. Im doing the whole depressed but quite hyper thing which is becoming MOST annoying because its not really noticable enough for mam to notice more than that theres something wrong with me but not quite WHAT.
Also dads decided to quit his job next week and go and do an MBA in Australia and of course we'll have to go with him and there's NO WAY I'm going but at the minute I don't want to make the whole thing worse because he's very stressed and mam's trying to make the best of it even though she'll have to leave all her friends AND the dog and of course she doesn't need me to argue with as well and AAAAAHHHH!!!!

Ahem..sorry