h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OWLatron,

July? oh thats handy as i have a lot of time on my hands over the summer, truck you say? damn you must have a lot of valuables! hope your insured im gonna clean you out.....ooohh i can see it now, lots of shiny things, im like a magpie you know, very attracted to shiny silver things bet the family silvers worth a few £, how many cars you got? if you left me the keys i could house-sit? (till the truck arrived anyway)

hey OWLatron, do you still embroider in the Royal Airy Fairy's? ooh your such a nice boy

ok have to be serious with you now for a minute and call on you in an official matter - as you are an Ace, (and probably the only 1 i can be bothered talking too, notice i put a capitol on 'A'ce? theres a reason for that and its nothing to do with the fact your 1 of a few of 'them' that have a s.o.h)! i demand you get all heavy with head and order him to remove my name from his tag!!!!! its embarrassing! i cant have people knowing i talk to him just wave your badge in his face, you wont have to say much cos hes thick as oops meant to think that last bit lmao



p.s./btw you been watching the Snooker? Ronnie today ffs poetry in motion! what a joy to watch!

i wont need you too house sit in july as its only a weekend thing but maybe in august when its the main kenyan holiday

did i say truck i meant forty foot trailer lol all that damn silver is getting in the way


and what do you mean do i still embroider in the Royal Air Force ??

could you enlighten me on this ??



andy



and with the Ace thingy im sure you could deal with this in your own friendly persuasive way

IV....oh dear,lost yer S O H now eh ??,,..,crikey,,I'll change name to save the beer crates flyin .....

Afternoon OWLatron,

40ft trailer? hell i was right you are a posh lol
well ive offered now, just give us a shout when the house (and grounds probably)! are empty, id be more than happy to take it off your hands

dont the RAF do embroidery anymore? they used to but i guess with all that time on your hands, the brylcreme boys have thought of other things to entertain themselves with now

you think i have my own 'friendly persuasive way' about me? why thankyou im inclined to agree with you though ill grant you it is different, people either warm to my way of doing/saying things or they dont - guess it depends what way your reading me or if you have a s.o.h or not, clearly You can see that

head,

relax ffs you know i thought it was funny, youve known me long enough by now to know my humour besides if i wasnt laughing id of stabbed you by now im a bit more thick skinned than some of the pansies on this site

afternoon IV

well as long as you can drive up to the castle past the moat and drawbridge lol but there is plenty of silver there wasting away if ya want it

and to biryani im off to the last match watch us go down my mates a qpr fan so ill get some abuse from him lol


andy

Hi OWLatron,

well so long as the Snookers finished, i shouldnt be here now its already started! hey im supposed to be the 1 with the castle ffs! but erm i dont mind removing all them shiny things if they are cluttering up the old place
well better go, 1 or 2 things to do then off, wave to my babysitter will you, havent told them im leaving yet, pointless these mods running round after me if ive already gone LOL

mods running after you why ???



andy

OWLatron,

why? cos the truth hurts OWLatron, im on pre-mod but im not going to stop being honest for anybody





p.s./for my babysitters....
----> here have some my own special recipe, the arsenic isnt for flavour but it gives it that extra kick i find lol

as the saying goes honesty is the best policy


andy

This post has been removed.

aye i suppose so but as i said honesty is the best policy maybe you hit a rwa nerve lol

andy

OWLatron,

ill say! i just heard her Bungee Jumping partners a Scouser! he is so going to get some stick for that next time i cross swords with him

but enough about those 's, did you see the match today?? go on go on go on i dont mind you boring me with Snooker i CAN take it, where as you can probably guess the football does my head inRonnie O'Sullivan is a GOD!




p.s./for the 's, as im in such a good mood today, partly due to the results at the Crucible, im not going to put any rat poison in your (can always do that tomorrow) im calling a ceasefire until the end of the day and to show willing heres a couple of glasses of from me, with sincerity.....unless your them 2 es at head office! in which case head will fill your glasses with 'recycled' beer

ahem!!


whats wrong with scousers then ??



as my missus is a scouser and proud of it



andy

OWLatron,

ooh ooh arent you masterful when your angry, do you bark at your brylcreme boys like that?

obviously i can tell you are a guy with impeccable taste, and your Misses is clearly a posh Scouser which makes all the difference..she is from St.Helens i presume? no wheely bins on bricks round there right? **rolls eyes** (ffs im so misunderstood round here, and why i dont know i can be so bloody nice sometimes its sickening)

right yeah so i was saying there was this Englishman, Irishman and Cockney Geezer and......what? oh youve heard that 1? ok so yeah well ill catch you later then pmsl

**taps fingers on the keyboard** ahem think i got away with that 1 **smuggrin**

he he what are you on ??











can i have some lol





andy

OWLatron,

im HIGH on life, (and contrary to nasty rumours spread by awol thats the only buzz im on)!! i dont let the b*ggers grind me down, lifes too short..plus having a s.o.h helps, i know you have 1 too so your halfway there not that my 1 redeeming quality is always appreciated but hey its not as if i care anyway is it?

say what do you call a Scouser in a suit? ........the accused

A bloke parks his car in some run down housing estate in Scouseland, a kid comes up to him and says, 'Hey Mister, ill watch your car for you for £50'.
Bloke says, 'See those two Rottweilers in the back of my car? they'll watch the car for me for free'.
Kid says, 'Do they put fires out'?

What do you call a Scouse woman in a white shellsuit? ........The bride

have you got Jimster on your pal pilot? would save me typing these out againlol
got to go find some more now

well heres one for you




SHORT AND SWEET......
Test your IQ with the question below:

There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the
action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to
the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.

Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses,
how should he express himself?

Think about it first before scrolling down for the answer...























He just has to open his mouth and ask, so simple.
If you got this wrong please - do not pass go, do not breed, just go dig a hole and hide

andy

OWLatron,

ouch you touche!

be back soon, off to dig a hole and hide in shame just for a bit till i can think of some fitting revenge

so does this prove an ACE can have a sense of humour lol