The "School" for the Perpetually Confused

An institure of higher learning? Pshaw..Leave that to those much more intelligent than ourselves.
Our quest is to show the world (of H2G2 of course! The real world is only in our imaginations and is much too scary to infiltrate) how rewarding and useful (not to mention pointless and entertaining) being perpetually confused actually is.
Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Want to join? Please visit the Administrator's Office A781553


ENTRANCE

Order is forgotten and confusion reigns in this not-so-academic school of sorts that is only accesable on foot to first time visitors (as you do not have the proper identification yet).
At the base of a massive hill are large, ornate iron gates standing ajar. To either side there is a three foot high fence leading off into the distant gardens and orchard, which at the right time might look quite foreboding, but just at this moment looks quite pleasant, though a bit odd in the bright afternoon sunlight. Through the gates and fence you can see a beautiful cobblestone driveway leading up the hillside to an enormous mansion that is too far away to spot any details clearly, but gives an air of importance and beauty.
Stepping through the gates proves to be a challenge. Though they are ajar, they're closed just enough so that one has to touch the bars of the gate on either side to pass through. (This generally wouldn't be a bad thing, but everytime the bars are touched an excruciating electrical shock runs through the object that touched them, and startling growels and demands for access codes (that were lost the first time the building was occupied) are fiercely emitted. Experiencing these events, you back out quickly and end up where you were to begin with, though, this time with a small cloud of dread weighing you down. Not wishing to try that again you ponder searching desperately for some way in, but before you can really even start to consider that thought, you see a sign post with some signs posted upon it (Strange to have sign posts with signs on them, no?) that you managed to miss detecting earlier.
The first sign briefly explains how the buidling in front of your respectful selves used to be occupied by a Mental Institution (an assylum, not a school, though they are quite similar in many respects if you think about it.). Already done reading this, you move down to the next sign, which explains that you should not go through the gate or fence as it will not be beneficial to your health, and so saying, the residents of the building are no longer responsible for any of the risks you might face if you proceed to commit the aforesaid acts.
“Quite helpful now…” you mutter, rubbing your hand where it had touched the gate. A red welt is forming.
The third sign asks you to wait patiently until the being whose duty it is to greet the guests and welcome them to the estate may come down and escort you onto the property. It guarantees a momentary wait time.
“Hmm. It figures.” You say snottily to yourself as you prepare for a LONG wait.
Even as you think that, a small..metallic..robot.. is drifting closer to you down the outside border of the fence.
“I’m Anders, the butler bot here. Please follow me.” It says curtly and begins back up the way it came.
Jogging to catch up with the bot, a thousand questions race through your mind to ask, but the bot doesn’t see, to be slowing so you just keep the questions to yourself and try to follow.
You moved to the left of the gates and are now continuing quite quickly down that same side of the fence. You pass countless flora that you couldn’t identify if you tried. Shocks of brilliant reds, greens, blues, yellows, oranges and purples of every shade and variation pop out a t you from the other growth. As you pass the flora hurried scurrying and some animal noises can be heard, but you can never even catch a glimpse of what might be making the noises. With wonder, you tear your eyes from them and see that the butler bot Anders is quite a bit ahead of you. You sprint to catch up and realize the bot is slowing down, so you do, too. Out of breath and generally confused, you look forward to see a break in the fencing that the bot has just passed through. It is perhaps large enough for a shipping semi to easily drive through.
“Please do hurry.” Says Anders and races off again up a steep set of well-worn brick stairs that are off to the right leading up the hill. Straight ahead is another path up the hill and to the left there is a cable mounted 20 feet or so off the ground that resembles a tramline. Turning back o the right, you hurry up the stairs, looking straight down at your feet al the way up, so as you don’t trip and fall on the uneven brick.
Though it seems to take forever, you finally reach the top. In front of you, a huge Victorian mansion with an array of dazzling features and colors ascends to the sky, but you’ve no time to gawk. The bot Anders has already gone up the porch steps, and crossed to the mammoth mahogany door (which it so kindly left open for you). Striding into the mansion, you run full into the bot, which seems to have stopped moving for the first time since you’ve seen it.
“Good. You made it.” Says Anders a bit arrogantly.
Cursing the bot, you nod your head.
“Welcome to the School for the Perpetually Confused, SPC for an acronym. Off to the left is the Administrators Office. You should go there immediately if you wish to join and have not yet. Also, there you may have your questions answered up to a certain degree (accuracy is not guaranteed). You can also leave comments, suggestions, and most other things there. Any news of events and other interesting things will be posted there as well, so you might want to check there every so often (not to mention mentioning some interesting things to post). As for the other rooms- please see this transport sheet. By simply selecting the room you wish to be at, you will be automatically transported to the front door of that room.” Anders says and then hurries off, oblivious to your quizzical stare.

Transport Sheet:

Administrator's Office- A781553
(More rooms soon to be added)

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