h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Cows With Guns


Fat and docile,
Big and dumb.
They look so stupid.
They arn't much fun.
-Cows Aren't Fun.

They eat to grow,
Grow to die,
Die to be et
At the Hamburger Fry.
-Cows well done.

Nobody thunkit,
Nobody knew,
Nobody imagined,
The Great Cow Guru.
-Cows are one.

He hid in the forest.
Read books with great zeal.
He loved Cheguavera,
A revolutionary veal.
-Cows say tongue.

He spoke about justice,
But nobody stired.
He felt like an outcast;
Alone in the herd.
-Cow dull drums.

He moo'd we must fight,
Escape or we'll die.
Cows gathered around,
'Cause the steaks were so high.
-Bad Cow pun.

But then he was captured;
Stuffed into a crate,
Loaded onto a truck,
Where he rode to his fat.
-Cows are bumed.

He was a scrawny calf,
Who looked rather woozy.
No one suspected
He was packin' an Uzi.
-Cows with guns.

They cam with a needle
To stick in his thigh.
He kicked for the groin,
He pissed in their eye.
-Cow well hung.

Knocked over a tractor
And ran for the door.
Six gallons of gas
Flowed out on the floor.
-Run Cows run.

He picked up a blowhorn
And jumped up on the hay;
"We are free roaming Bovines
We run free today."

We will fight for
Bovine Freedom
And hold our large heads high.
We will run free
With the Buffalo
Or die.
-Cows with guns.

They crashed the gate
In a great stampead.
Tipped over a milktruck,
Torched all the feed.
-Cows have fun.

Sixty police cars
Were pilled in a heap.
Covered in Cow pies,
Covered up deep.
-Much Cow dung.

Black smoke risin'
Darkining the day.
Twelve burning McDonalds,
Have it your way.

We will fight for
Bovine Freedom
And hold our large heads high.
We will run free
With the Buffalo
Or die.
-Cows with guns.

The President said,
"Enough is enough
These uppety cattle
It's time to get tough."
-Cow dung flung.

The newspapers gloated.
Folks sighed with relief.
Tommarow at noon,
They would all be ground beef.
-Cows on buns.

The Cows were surrounded.
They waited and prayed.
They moo'd their last moo's,
They chewed their last hay.
-Cows outgunned.

The order was given
To turn Cows into Woppers.
Enforced by the might
Of ten thousand coppers.

But on the horizen,
Surrounding the shoppers,
Came the defening roar
Of Chickens in choppers.

We will fight for
Bovine Freedom
And hold our large heads high.
We will run free
With the Buffalo
Or die.
-Cows with guns.


sounds like Cow House propaganda...

put it on the cowhouse