Journal Entries

Because

Free from your past, free of your future too, there's nothing left to rise above but you.
Show me your ocean red, kiss the tears that stain my neck, drug me with visions untrue.
But I own a photograph, you lay there naked on your back, safe in a stone house by the sea.
There's nothing true and nothing's real, but I remember one clear feeling, warm beneath your gentle company.
When I lay dying upon some bed, I hope that you'll remember this: the only one I want to see is you.
-- Michael Gira, "Untitled Love Song"

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Latest reply: May 2, 2003

for those that might care

Rain, hail, snow, and ice:
All are different,
But when they fall
They become the same water
As the valley stream.

- Ikkyu (1394-1481)

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Latest reply: Apr 19, 2003

chillfactor

Your self-partiality is at
the root of all your illusions.
There aren’t any illusions
when you don’t have this
preference for yourself.

- Bankei (1622-1693)

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Latest reply: Apr 6, 2003

cellardoor

yellow. What the hell is that?
the colour of puke. Snot. Healing bruises. Jaundice.

the oscars are on. Who cares. Blech.

jann arden hates the wind. I'm watching this war like it's in my own back yard.

I didn't read my driving book.

Kerry. where are you. I'm reading these submissions. I think we have enough to go on.

Why do you still like me? For a white guy you're okay.

everyday I change my mind about going out there this year. I want to go but not tell everyone I'm there. I would tell you and my family. Then when I got back I would stop talking to everyone but you and my family.
evolution.
meek inherit the earth.
haiku
Warren Ellis
dogs named griffin
bloody tattoos
yellow
messiah
bleeding girls named Nancy
black eyed boys
being messed up
waking up the next day

what do you do with these thoughts in your head that scratch the inside of your skull

tell the banshee women that screaming at my windows will not make them welcome

i have developed a deep need for physical pain

i have developed a deep need to give head

i have developed a deep need talk to strangers

I have developed a deep need to write passionate loveletters

why don't i have more friends like you at least closer to me

I am restraining the screams inside of me because this darkness scares kate
i've seen her face when the scream leaks out at the seams and she is terrified of it. so am i.

i look at my hands waiting for the stigmata. but i am not the messiah
but the pain is there like i am

i want....too many things. the mec catalog came out

good bye kerry

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Latest reply: Mar 24, 2003

a sigh is just a sigh

I was waiting for the tide to go out so that I could go treasure
hunting. I occupied myself in the garden for a couple of hours. Trust me to forget about the tides. Anyway I was looking through the tangles weeds of the roses and I started to think of you. Not that the weeds reminded me of you just was something that my hands could do while my mind wandered. It was nice this little journey my mind took. All the times we walked in the forest. Amazingly enough I started to remember all my dreams that you were in. You were dreamed about a lot.

The tide was finally out. I ran down to the beach and started
scavenging. I found a wonderful piece of driftwood that looked rather
creepy. I think that I'll drag it up to the front of the cottage. It would make a great thing to hang bottles of coloured water from. They would reflect beautiful light in the morning.

I still have my blue bottle. When you come over again you'll have to
look through it. I know that you'll see something. The other people that have looked through see nothing. I think they think I'm a bit weird.

I still have that spare room. Or you can sleep with me on the beach.
It's amazing what sleeping there does to your dreams. I know that the dogs won't mind. As long as K. is safe they don't worry about me leaving.

Affectionately yours,

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Latest reply: Mar 15, 2003


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Ram0na (seems that I've lost my sock againl)

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