h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Went to try buy trousers, yesterday. Preference was for jeans.
There is no shop in the whole of Cambridge, apparently, selling jeans to fit me now.... - so we measured my thigh, - my right thigh now has a circumference of 2 foot. that's 24 inchs, which is.... about 60 CM? = oddly, my left thigh is about an inch or so less

My next challenge is to therefore increase the left leg size, to match the right, and, then; to shrink my waist, whilst increasing my thighs; until they are all three the same size; I'm aiming for 28" but feel 30" is potentially possible, for my waist... (I'm about 34" waist ATM; have been as low as 32" in recent times...)

In the end I got two pairs of loose, baggy, err, yoga/pilatz cotton trouser things - OK, so I am lucky, I can just for the most part give up entirely on trousers, and just wear leggings, for the gym, and wear skirts/dresses- who knew my becominga transvestite was, really, a sensible move to solve the problem of way too much time spent in the squat rack.

latest squatting, is not in the squat rack; its on the bosu; apparently my balance is rather good - also started doing a lot of piston squats, as I can seemingly balance on one leg now, fine.... = not yet tried piston squats, on the bosu…. that might be problematic...

(a bosu (both sides used), is a balance training tool; a 'platform', 'stuck' to an inflatable ball- you stand on the platform, and so balance on the inflated ball underneath)

off on holiday end of the week, not far away, just a break, which happens to coincide with a beer festavil there

Will you actually be able to walk with thighs that size?

ahh.... good point... I'd not thought of that I doubt I'd ever find jeans to fit again

Oh, I'm sure you can find a tailor in London City who is up to the challenge provided they are paid enough. I once read that one of the Krupp heirs had trousers made of a number of jeans that were disassembled whereupon the best bits were sewed to fit him the best way possible.

I'm thinking of doing something simular myself, only.... more different; basically cut down the outside seems on a pair of jeans that fits my waist/bum, and then wire-in chainmail down the 'gash' in the sides, to widen the leg 'holes' sorted! might make a bit of noise in the washing machine, and trying to pass through the airport X-ray scanners

Good luck with that

was thinking, other material might be easier to attach/sew on, than chainmail.... - maybe a random patchwork in the 'gash' on the side of the legs..... = I've a whole bunch of old knickers that need to be dumped.... maybe they'd do.... a patchwork of different coloured panties, sewn into my jeans.... - I'm sure its all the fashion thesedays….. recycling and up-scaling or whatever its called