h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

yeah I am properly pretty insecure, and I'm am really really shy if I'm not in my "element" so to speak. I don't really trust people (hey I've got good reason, most people I meet when I was younger tried to kill me)...... for some reason people don't like me, some don't like me because I study hard, some don't like me because I'm different and some don't want to spend time with me because I don't drink..... there are many reasons but I must say I'm pretty confused myself

can't imagine why you don't have any friends? You seem like one of the coolest (doesn't cover it but the best I can think of) people I have ever had the joy of talking to..........

Oh, thank you Great talking to you too
When you say tried to kill you....You are joking of course...Right?
People that wouldn't hang out with you because you don't drink....Are very stupid people...
Virtual OK?

hey you are cute when you blush , but you must know how great you are..... if you don't then now I have told you

nope I wasn't joking..... can't remember most of what has happend to me but it is comming back a little at a time (nightmares often).... but when I was around 13 my classmates tried to hang me..... got the robe around my neck and started stringing me up. I pretended like I liked it and tried helping pulling me up, knew this would gross them out so they would leave and I would live....... I've experienced a _lot_ of bad things

yes they are mmmm fill it with cola and I'll have a toast (cola in there) may we both have many happy years ahead of us

Wow....Bad things do seem to happen to you
Of course statistcly it means your life is going to be smooth sailing from now on, all the bad things having already happened to you

I had that same idea........ but the fact is I am always very very unlucky (perharps someone has cursed me)

but lets not think of all the things trying to flatten little old Mutant, how have your day been?

Same as usual- boring.
I've recently mooved to a differnt office and as I am now not immidiatly in front of my supiriours faces, they can happily forget all about me unless they need me to do something. No need for them to bother with trivialities such as oh, telling me I can go home when there's nothing for me to do....
I'm looking forward to another equally exciting day tomorrow.
Wednesday should be interesting. On wednesday they give lily a weapon

of course they won't tell you when you can go home, like the rest of us they can't see how they would manage without you

I'll send you some nice thoughts tommorrow (proberly when I wake up around noon-ish )

uh oh...... they are giving you a weapon?.... ...... you're not going to use that on me are you?

I wouldn't do that, even if you WERE in range, which of course you're not. It's only a rifle, not a misile launcher.
They better be really nice to me though

I'll better be going to sleep now...
Good night

oh you wouldn't take a shoot even if you where in range?..... I think I'm in love

you would think that after putting you though all that horrible office-work they would at least give you a rocket launcher



have a great nights sleep, goodnight

Were are but a small paperworking unit...Our budget cannot afford us even one small rocket launcher

well that kinda take the fun out of being in the military

I know!
What's the point in being a soilder if you don't get to shoot things?
I'm quite good at, it you know

sergant: welcome to the military
lily: weeeeee I get to shot things up
sergant: ohhh.... well.... not quite
lily: what do you mean? Soldier = person + weapon + training => things go boom
sergant: actually..... you see that desk over there?
lily: yeah?.... want me to shoot it to pieces?
sergant: nope
lily: then what?
sergant: I want you to sit there
lily: and do what?
sergant: well I don't actually want you to _do_ something, but we might want you to use the computer every once in a while

does this sound like a conversation you have had

I'm properly no good anymore, I learned shooting when I was very very very young, but haven't practised for several years But I'll try and stay on your good side

It was something like that, yes
Only at first they yell at you alot at basic training. The desk comes later.
Actually, my professional training, the computer course I took, was the most fun I've had in the army.

mmmmm they yelled at you?....... and yet they are still alive?

what kind of course was it? What did you learn?

Just basic computers, nothing particulary exciting...

so generally how to use word, exel, powerpoint and so on? Or do you use other exiting things (I'm guessing they didn't teach you latex or any programming languages)

Not on a basic course like mine...
I was offered a programming course before I enlisted, but seing as how you have to sing up for two and a half (!) years of additional service, I wasn't TOO tempted

yeah I can see your point, although programming is kinda a cool skill (but with what I study I guess it would be strange if I didn't say that)

you cool cats,seem well...cool