h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

the benevilent force of the Hoover moves constantly throughout all our lives of course> - and I know nightoover must be real/true; I wrote to to teh Man, and he denied nighthoover.... what more proof does one need. - mind, still waiting for a reply from the vatican

I'm not a crook who had sex with that woman on the grassy knoll!

damnit. you know don't ou? you do... how on Jupiter did you discover it was me? I figured with the faulse nose and eerything no one would ever disrecognize me

The faux nose and funny eyeglasses were an important tipoff, only barely p!ausible on account of the mini.

but... they made me do it! the alien lizzard women made me do it! with the worms they fed into my head through my ears! and their polystyrine houses and cars! if they'd not infectsted me, they took over my body and mini! and my mind! and, then, then, they whipped me... err. whiped my memory I mean! I can't be held responsible for the actions of alien lizzard women worms in my head; they said they'd kill Elvis is how they got me into their polystyrine cars!