Endangered Words
From time to time I shall add alphabets of endangered words which are suitable for particular professions or environments. This one is:
ENDANGERED WORDS LIST # 1 - CORPORATE
Some nearly extinct words deserve a big comeback. The best of them can be used to stun your co-workers, confound corporate communications, and battle bureaucracy. Please join me in protecting these helpless creatures!
ABSQUATULATE - To escape in a hurry (how you deal with staff meetings)
BUMF - Worthless printed matter (probably from MarCom*)
CORPOCRACY - A bureaucratic company (with way too many bosses, but we're not naming names)
DEFENESTRATE - To throw (a thing like a marketing plan, or a person, like your boss) out the window
EMBRANGLE - To involve somebody and get them entangled (best way to absquatulate from a no-win situation)
FADOODLE - Nonsense (probably from MarCom)
GARDYLOO - A warning cry that something is about to hit the fan
HYPNAGOGIC - Inducing sleep (like your last presentation)
INEXPUGNABLE - Impossible to get rid of (like that project that wouldn't die)
JANISSARY - A bunch of loyal followers (way too loyal)
KAKISTOCRACY - Government by the least qualified (our current global system)
LIRIPOOP - Something with a steep learning curve (probably software, not unlikely to be from Microsoft or Lotus)
MENTIMUTATION - A change of mind (what your boss has all the time)
NONNEGATIVE - Not less than zero (like your performance rating)
OPUSCULE - A very minor piece of work (probably from MarCom)
PERSIFLAGE - Chit-chat (common before water-coolers became extinct)
QUIDDITY - A hairsplitting quibble (probably from Marcom)
RUMBLEGUMPTION - Common sense (seldom seen in MarCom)
SNOLLYGOSTER - A sneaky b*****d (you know who you are)
TECHNOCRACY - Government by tekkies (an ugsome thought)
UGSOME - Really disgusting
VADEMECUM - Something useful to carry around, like your PalmPilot or Hitchiker's Guide
WINDSUCKER - An envious person (who probably wants your job)
XYLOID - Like wood (for example, your boss's normal expression)
YOICKS - A hunting cry (replaces many clichés like "Just do it.")
ZYMOLOGY - The study of fermentation (best to do this after work)
This Endangered Alphabet comes to you courtesy of Bill Warriner. Register any complaints with [email protected]
* For non-corporate readers, "MarCom" translates into "Marketing Communications," an inexpugnable department that is in no danger of extinction whatsoever, but maybe we should reconsider that. Yoicks!
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