h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Anyone who can even think of doing that sort of thing to a cat doesn't deserve to call me a prude! I don't care if it is a joke, it's thoroughly offensive. Wash your mouth out with soap and water. Or your hands.

Here's my latest:

Carl Weathers is all year round.

*nudging Krissy in the ribs* Eh? Eh? Whaddya think?

"Wow, man, good nyborg...."

Sorry, drifted a bit.

Hmmm...

*collapsing in giggles* Excellent joke Spartus! hee hee hee hee!

Jonny, I apologize for what I said about the darn cat, ok? Sheesh. Here, have a prune.

I don't care about cats any more, say what you like about 'em. They're all evil, pure evil. Here's the latest from my neck of the woods:

Go, go kitty! Teddy! Gargle!

Thanks for the prune, Krissy, went down a treat.

Jonny! I'm shocked you could say such things about a teddy! Shocked and appalled!

Here, have a strawbettry. (Unless you want another prune) *eating another prune*

I think it's all caused by the hallucinatory properties of the strawbettries. Can't get enough of 'em, thanks Krissy. I've got a few raspbarnies if you'd like to sample one of those.

By the by, I have no idea what I'm referring to by "it".

Wibble, sofa, boing.

Have I got this conceptual humour thing?

Just as much as anyone else, I think.

Too many more prunes and some folks won't make it through the opening credits of whatever movie we might watch at some point in the distant future.

Kate's on, I can see she is, so I thought I'd come and say ullo, and as long as I'm here I figure I'll put a post over here to prevent everyone from getting cramps from scrolling so much. It is, come to think of it, the second most helpful thing I've done all day.

You still have to scroll all the way down, you know.

Here's a from the conceptual humor vaults:

You can lead a yak to water, but you can't teach an old dog to make a silk purse out of a pig in a poke.

Oh dear Bob, my head hurts...

Winston Churchill, yak's bell! Snarffle!

?

You must stop striking yourself with the remote control if you wish the ache to stop. The buttons aren't working because the batteries are dead, there's no movie in the VCR, and there's no VCR. I'm also having a tough time believing that the refrigerator box over there is a big screen television.

*calling out* NeverBob's being pedantic! What's the cure for that again? Kick him 'till he hallucinates? *pops an imaginary tape into the cardboard box and settles back to watch Blade Runner* (it's all rainy outside today. Fits the mood.)

Conceptual humour, or simply a (very) mixed metaphor?

"Up the creek and never mind the paddle, we haven't even got a canoe."

Well, it looks like the early worm has turned the tables, now that the shoe is on the other hand!

Oh, and by the way, "And then the mother polar bear said, "Radio... radio!"

Loud hysterical sound from the door bell..
A even louder and in some way more hysterical voice is calling....

"SOMEONE ORDERED A PIZZAAA !?!?!?!? "

Might not have been our friend Kate, Kristina. There's another Kate, the only way to know for sure is to actually click and see whose homepage comes up. I made a short remark about this in a forum thread on Kate's homepage, called something like "oh, it's really you this time", cos I made that mistake once.