h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi, BB.

It's been a while. Just passing through on my way to wherever. Curiousity? Nostalgia? I don't know. Just curious to see what's up in your quadrant of the universe. Sorry for a lack of contact, I've been preoccupied lately (head up ass, etc) and also for a while there was trying not think about old baggage concerning my 'departure'. Still gets my antlers in a twist.

Saw the reading list. My last book suggestion to you (in person and way back in the dark ages) went over like a Chris Rock movie at a Klan meeting (and on reflection it really wasn't that great), but I like to think my tastes have refined lately (but only just).

I know you're into the 'classics', but ever try Chuck Palahniuk? He's written Choke, Invisible Monsters and Fight Club (yes, it was made into a movie, but don't judge based on that alone). Good stuff. Or Neil Gaiman's American Gods?

Anyway, drop a line some time ([email protected]) if you would like to talk about recent events - or not. Sometimes I need to pop out of 'hermit mode'. Sorry for the new thread but you have such a nice flow going to your Reading List topic that I didn't want to disrupt any normal communications from anyone.

Sorry to hear about the kittens and everything else. We've got them falling out of the sky up here right now. Waiting for the locusts to come next...


Mad Mystic Moose
"Pleased to meet you [again], hope you guess my name."*


*Alright, so apparently my tastes haven't been refined enough to avoid quoting the Stones. What's your point?

Moooooooooooose!

How odd to hear from you now... just the other day I was wondering how you were doing.

All's well here, am in the midst of a year of happines at the moment. I've been painting a good bit, making some bizarre things. Still single, just terminated a brief and bouncy relationship with someone who made me wild/drove me nuts. *sigh* What IS it with these guys, eh? I'm working part-time til October, decided to give myself a birthday present of time to do what pleases me. It's been awesome, though I'm not so fond of being poor. Still, very worthwhile.

Must go now, the weather is perfect for beach wallowing after ages of miserable rain. I'll email you when I have the time to sit and be coherent. I'm really glad you appeared from the blue!

Blue, purple, green... not sure exactly what I came out of... or didn't. Need to put on a miner's cap to see what's up in this funk.

Just had about as thought-provoking a moment as I'll have...

Mom Moose is getting treatment in Pittsburg for something, and I've pretty much been here holding down the homestead with nothing much to do. Not sure if she's coming home... for reasons other than health... Dr. Dick is getting used to having her around all the time. Looks like the Pitt has finally swallowed her up. We'll see.

Another job behind me (the very large, very friendly, very strange boss wanted me to go 'on a trip' with her, which involved sharing a hotel room, at a point when I was up for promotion.) Other than 'housesitter' and animal handler, I DJ occassionally, or 'KJ' (karaoke) when I have to fill in, but this place is pretty boring. People here... well, 'friends', I guess, have no idea how to enjoy themselves or do anything unproductive.

So anyway, after five or six cancellations for various trips and non-events, I went off on my own to a medieval fair.

Wandered around for some time - it's amazing how much crap you don't want to buy when you don't have the money - and as I'm about to leave I stumble on this hypnotist show. He does the usual demonstration: "Your arm is getting heavier, your wallet is getting lighter..." Blah... blah... and more blah. However, after all that he comments on how well it worked with some of the people he said to the audience: "It was your thoughts that did that. Now imagine what 30 years of thinking has done to your reality." Youch! (I just turned 30 last month.)

Okay, maybe it wasn't all that profound, but I had had a few flagons of mead, if you take my meaning. And I started to think about how I still can't figure out anything, how I can't decide where I'm going. 'What, where, who, when, why, how?'

How much of that is the way that I've been made to think over the years? Or done myself? Is the confusing mess because I'm a bad housekeeper? What have I been feeding my head? What's it been eating?

So I guess that's the Moose Profound Moment of the Day, brought to you by whatever it was that I was drinking. One of those 'more questions than answers' things.

How do you manage to live without baggage? Not fair, I suppose. I know better. We all have baggage. How do you always manage to seem to have those nice little wheels on the bottom of all your baggage? Maybe not right away, but eventually, anyway.

Congrats on the new job and extra time. I really can't see you in shoes. Professionally, I mean.

And as for the bouncy-boy you always did seem to go for the 'wrong sort', if you'll excuse my meaning (and presumption.) It's not really in your nature to have anything boring around you. Those roller coasters are fun, but the wait in line is usually longer than the ride. Perhaps a jump on the ferris wheel is in order for a while? Just sit up there and look around for a while....

Well, I have no idea what is going on, who is doing it, or how they are doing it. In that respect, everything is exactly the same with me.

Later,

MMM

HAHAHAHA! That's prime, honey. I have LOADS of it.... steamer trunks, packed with tiaras and feather boas to suit ANY occasion. And those nice little wheels can get pretty rusty when I don't maintain them properly. I was in a really bad state of depression the end of last year... things were pretty dire. Just kinda decided to make some changes in my head, I guess. I've been doing a semi-buddhist practice for a while now which has helped a lot. What initially attracted me to it was the idea that we really do have control over our reaction to stimulus.... not to the stimuli themselves as much, except in a cause-and-effect way (I'm getting better at chosing the causes I'm creating to bring on the effects I want). But it's really a matter of choice how I process things emotionally and I've been trying to turn the s**t into fertilizer lately. It's working. Mental alchemy, at your service. Anyway, it's a very empowering way of approaching life for me, get's rid of that crummy feeling of being victimized.

As for the bouncy-boys.... ummmmm.... yeah. I'm trying to find a balance there at the moment. After Dave I've only dated 2 fellas before this last whirlwind, very nice, sane, lovely, responsible young men. *sigh* No grand passion, though. The most recent I reacted to like I did with Dave and thank god I didn't fall in love with him or I'd be in a hell of a situation right now. But I learned some things about myself in this one, mainly that my rational approach is not necessarily the best one always. Guess I've gotta learn to develop a bit of faith before proof is presented, but also I NEED to learn to feel that passion for someone who's a bit more stable than the ones I have a taste for. *sigh* No baggage, eh?

Sorry to hear your mom's not doing so well. Are you enjoying being on your own there?

I'm off to work now... hi ho....

Hasta la pasta.

Sorry, I suppose memory of the Mother of God idealized is a little far from reality. I mean, I've seen you in a funk before, but somehow you always just seemed a little bit more free than the rest of us.

As for the bouncy-boy thing, sorry again. Too many hours in the hot sun listing to people talk in pidgeon Middle English and drinking imported beer, I suppose. Huzzah! I guess passion and reliability are going to be a tough combination to pin down, but you do deserve both.

Not that I should dispense advice, I circled 'none of the above' on my multiple choice question and haven't done much in the past year and a half. Except for a stupid crush on a bar maid. I am completely insane. I guess my advice to others that they should take a break should take into the account that I pretty much just stopped bothering to try to work things out. That's no decent answer for anyone with a pulse. I guess I'll have to check and see if I have one after a few other things are resolved.

I guess in a way living with mostly boring, ordinary people so long I just kind of needed to remember wild and unencumbered BB. Someone else's illusion of insanity keeping me sane - go figure. That's no excuse for laying the 'legend' on you at a time when you need to just 'be'. Oops.

Anyway, the alone thing is fine... just wish I was really alone. I've got the 10 indoor cats, 3 dogs and a bird to deal with. Hoping to shift some of those cats on someone who just moved to a place where she's going to be looking after horses and wants some barn cats. But she only wants females, so I keep picking the young ones up and hoping that nothing will 'arise'. If mom winds up in Pitts permanently, then the dogs go, too. And probably the bird.

It's a bit boring, though. Well, maybe 'alone' is the wrong term. I like my privacy, but I also apparently like to hear the sound of my own voice and haven't quite gotten the hang of Great-Grandma's habit of yelling at the television set. Don't really watch TV anymore, anyway. Except the news, and that sucks even when you can believe what they're saying. Seems like everyone is goose-stepping to the beat of the same drummer these days. So much for democracy. Anyway, I guess I'm bore myself too much to have a decent conversation with just me.

Oh, the Mom thing and recent events: One day more than a year ago I was at work trying to decide if my crummy job was worth trying to prove that a guy could be sexually harassed by her female boss who can do no wrong in the company's eyes and running out of everything we make and sell because in reality she was terrible and it was people like me keeping things together. My mom walks in, says that she can't stay long but she just found out that she had a very large breast tumor.

Mom is an 'Oh, by the way' expert. So she walks out after that little bomb and not soon after I found it a little hard to concentrate on a job that already sucked way too much and walked out myself. Two rounds of chemo, two operations and now radiation and she's a little worse for wear but the picture looks a little brighter for her than it did last July.

After she had her first chemo and surgery things settled down a little and I started helping a friend who has his own karaoke/DJ/entertainment type thing. He was expecting a baby and also found out that he might be having serious health problems, then his wife had health problems after having the baby. So I starting being a 'roadie' when he couldn't carry equipment, a replacement when he couldn't host, and eventually an occassional DJ. Not reliable or lucrative at the moment for me, but it's something to do. For some reason every steady gig he tries to get with the intent of my working it fizzles out.

I'm looking at trying to do my own thing... I'm going to research selling stuff online this week and see what I can throw together. There are no jobs here. Unless I want to become a truck driver. Assuming I had the desire, and I could cough up the money. Nah. Definitely not me. Or let's see... I don't think I qualify for 'exotic dancer' either. And we know how the waiter thing works out. What was it, one week the last time I tried that? Carafe of water poured down someone's back, bang someone else in the head with a tray? Retail sales? Well, that always works out great, doesn't it? And I guess we've all learned that I suck at office politics (and knowing what's going on), too. That is, if they were hiring around here and I could get the job. Still fairly conservative around here, not too many people want a secretary - er, assistant - that looks like me sitting outside their office.

Anyway, I read an article about this new company that appraises comics and I have an big old collection in the attic. Then there was the article I read in a magazine about this woman who started her own business after selling stuff on E-Bay. She goes around to yard and estate sales and finds stuff, then auctions it off. I've got to be smart enough to do something similar, at least. In my own niche, perhaps, if I can find a niche. Maybe I can dig myself out of my steadily deepening hole yet. Hell, maybe one day I'll actually be able to travel. Some time this millenium....

Well, now that I've put the shoe on the other foot (or something like that) by way of apology, I guess I've also filled you in.

Later,

MMM

I'm still really good at p*ssing people off, aren't I? Got to remind myself that I'm best taken in small doses.

Hope you don't mind I took a look at your Yahoo! galleries - you've gotten really good with this computer stuff. From what I can see, at least.

Anyway, there was another purpose to making another post: How is Erin? I was just wondering how things were going with her. I was watching the news and CSPAN about the possibility of new accounting federal oversight laws and it made me wonder what she was up to and if things were good.

You hadn't pissed me off at all. Was just busy being my usual consistent self... *mumble*... haven't been at the puter the last few days...*mumble*... ummmmm.... Bernardo wanted another chance at practicing responsibility, and since I've kinda missed him ...ummmmm.... you know. *sigh* I need this challenge in my life now, I guess. I don't know how much of this MoGgie stuff you've looked through, but if you've read through some of my journal entries you'll have noticed that I'm concerned about my tendency to distance myself emotionally from people and keep a tight little wall around my vulnerable bits. He refuses to accept that. arrrrrrrrrrgh. This is not safe. grrrrrr. It's not fair to do it when he points it out to me and tells me how shitty and used it makes him feel to be involved with a 'spectator'. o o o o o. I'm not gonna DIE from being all-the-way-honest, am I? Wish he weren't so volatile, though. Makes a stable, rational MoGgie nervous, it does.

Erin is doing well, has held a job she likes for the past year, is a leader in the Buddha-group, and recently became a member of the philharmonic chorus. She's finally starting to grow up emotionally so it's not an easy or painless process, but if she makes the kind of progress over the next year that she has in the last she'll be just fine.

Just re-read your message from a few days back, had replied to it in length on the day my puter kept crashing and I finally gave up.

I'm sorry to hear about your mom. Give her my regards (I really enjoyed the hell out of her) and I hope she gets her health back under control.

A crush on a barmaid??? Have things changed with you or are you just opening up your options in that sense?

What came of looking into selling stuff online? I have a friend who supports herself quite nicely by selling jewelry on EBay. It's incredibly demanding... sometimes she works 16 hours daily, but for the most part she loves it because she's her own boss, sets her own hours, and can structure things the way she wants them. She's doing well enough that she was able to buy herself a nice house and make it into the home she's always wanted, if that's any kinda incentive for you. I think that might be the perfect thing for you... you have all the necessary skills and it seems like it would suit your temperament. I've thought of doing it myself, but realize that I just haven't the discipline to make myself work when I'm not in the mood for it.

Don't give up on me or think I'm pissed when I don't respond immediately to your messages. I'm on a mission to diminish my mass before my birthday and have been biking to the beach with Bernardo and swimming for an hour or so after work. Now we've decided to do a lot of dancing too (he's got all that latin beat in his blood, so I'm gonna learn to salsa and cha cha and perfect the merengue) and you KNOW how well I manage to take someone's lead so this is going to be an exersize in patience and determination. I think I can.... I think I can.... cha cha cha

You could say that certain things happened absent of my will to amplify the general confusion that is my life. And for that reason, I've backed off entirely from the even the potential for any such interpersonal entanglements. I don't need the extra confusion and I don't have the time to figure out if I had it wrong, partially wrong or right. I try to push all that to the back for now and the foreseeable future.

It seems that Mom will recover in terms of health, barring any future reappearances of cancer. Her last scheduled radiation treatment was today, now they just have to test her regularly to make sure it has gone nowhere else. Her problem now, as always, is dealing with Dr. Dick. He wants her around but he is still trying to avoid getting pinned down or committed (as if 20+ years isn't committment enough).

I'm still in the 'organization' phases of self-employment: reading books, trying to go through clutter and mess to see what I have to sell, and looking at different ways of shifting that stuff so I have the funds to start something up.

How much mass could you have possibly acquired?

As for the rest, wasn't giving up or anything, I've just grown accustomed to people taking what I say the wrong way.

I'm glad your mom is doing ok. As for Dr. Dick.... well, she must be reasonably comfortable with the way things are or she'd have moved on years ago. You know what fickle critters we womenfolk are.

Mass: I'm the same as when you were here, would just like to annihilate about 10 pounds before I turn 40 as I have this superstition that if I don't before then I never will. So today I'm gonna pedal to the jazz brunch for a while til it gets too hot to endure, then ride home via Las Olas/A1A/Sunrise. Then I'll go for a snorkel before the late afternoon rainstorm. Then I'm gonna come home and have a couple of beers and paint. I'm working on something I really like inspired by my voodoo dolls, The Scream and sexual frenzy. *sigh* Problem is, Bernardo went strange on me just when things were flowing well and now my head is too balled up to get back into the mood. Today will be a day of mental housekeeping, clear out the cobwebs and goo and move back into a fresh head with only me in there. It's a shame, because I'm really gonna miss some bits of him (aside from the obvious) but I can't deal with the agitation and turmoil. *sigh* He thinks I'm passionless and unhappy because I'm not a nurturing lil hausfrau type. His 'solution' is to provoke a reaction by saying things to hurt me. And you know me.... I become even more silent and withdrawn in that sorta scenario. Not a good situation for either of us. Damn, I just don't understand people who think that feeling can only be expressed with bullshit words that only have meaning in that moment. Passion doesn't always have to be noisy and disruptive, I don't think.

Oops... vented on you. Sorry. Anyway, I've decided to go fulltime at work, though the plan was to wait til October. I'm tired of being poor and since I work on my day off half the time anyway I figure I might as well just give in to it and get my wages bounced to where they need to be. This job doesn't suck all the juice out of me, so I don't really need that extra day off to be productive. It's been a wonderful break for the past 7 months, though. I needed that.

Almost noon now, so it's time to get moving.

Take care of yourself. Everything is gonna come together when you figure out what together means for you. I'm sure of it.

You've got to be kidding me. What's his definition of passion? He must have one funky dictionary. Baking cookies and those disgustingly nicey-nice white greeting cards with the silver flowers on? Please. There's a difference between passion and Mrs. Cleaver. You're not Mrs. Cleaver. You've got enough inner fire for three MOGs when you want to... if he can't stand the heat.... I'm sorry to hear about that, even if you were just venting. You really don't need someone to hurt your feelings to provoke a reaction from you. That really sucks. Infants do that.

Going full time? What are your feet going to think about that?

Treatments are over for mom, and she's still living over there. He's still talking marriage, but every day it's something new that puts it off for another day, week or millenia, it seems.

I'm just wasting time for the moment. I should probably exercise or something, myself. The money I thought I was going to put into doing my own thing never came, as the DJ gig I had got permanently cancelled. The establishment's owners 'want to do a little more research to get the best possible results', so their events are on hold until next summer. And the last fill-in KJ thing I did blew up in my face - an everything that can go wrong thing (although it was almost entirely because of his equipment and his techie), so I'm not expecting any more work from my 'friend' any time soon. Need money to make money, you know.

So I'm going to look into getting another crummy job, and/or selling my bass and amplifier to get started.

Oh yeah, that happened about a year and a half ago. These people I know were starting a band. Nothing major. But they wanted me to sing (something that I had plenty of time to work on with the karaoke stuff, and apparently got good there for a while), and they knew I could write when I really wanted to. The snag was that they would eventually need a bass player and wanted me to learn from the old one. But then the 'brainchild' of this sad little adolescent fantasy of a diversion moved away, and everything else was kind of getting shifted to me, and I was just supposed to be learning. It got ugly, and wreaked havok with various relationships. It hasn't even been brought up in the last six months. We all just kind of agreed to quit without even discussing it openly. I haven't even touched the thing in months, so I'm thinking I need money, and that's money sitting there gathering dust.

But for some reason it's really hard for me to get motivated about anything. Has been for a while.

They'll be fine. They're healed, back to normal, and this job isn't grueling. I can even sit down when there's nothing to be done. The idea!

Now I have this vision of you in my head.... rock-n-roll star.... long hair.... maybe a tattoo... aoooooooooooowwwwwwwwww baaaaaaybee Wanna come down here for the winter months? I'll take the accordion and you'll play bass and sing. We could be RICH! I'll sew a tiny leatherette costume for the cat right now. Oom pah pah.... (already have my tattoo... did I tell you? a turquoise Kokopelli piping at the moon on the back of my neck) ummm yeah... where were we?

What's up with the lack of motivation? Nothing striking your fancy or just totally blah unmotivated no matter what?

I had a great day yesterday. George Tandy at the jazz brunch (I know him from the buddha-meets) and mellow music til 2. I was quiet, just sat people-watching and enjoying the sun. Then I popped over and had a beer by the Elbo Room, talked to some people and rode down to Banana Joe's. Sat there for a couple beers and some conversation, was making strange looking faces with my colored pencils (I take my little sketch book sometimes) and then in the evening I went for a snorkel. I was remembering that day when you and I went to the beach and had a few beers and planned the movie we wanted to make. What was it called? The Invisible Naked Bikini Raider from Nimbus III? *sigh* My memory ain't what it used to be. But I wish we'd made that movie. And I remember what a hoot it was coming up with that outrageous plotline. I miss having a partner in lunacy. Everyone else has become so damn normal. *sigh*

Sorry for the long time between replies....

If it makes you feel any better, I wish I was down there being your partner in lunacy as well. Especially given recent blizzards, but as much as coming back here wasn't a choice for me then getting stuck here is even less of a choice lately.

What's up with the expansion of your portfolio or 'sphere of influence' to include Providence, Courage and all that? Your Son Pete give you a promotion?

Anyway... where were we? Lack of motivation. Now that I think about it, I believe it's a matter of conditioning. I've been washed, rinsed and conditioned many, many times. I think from an early age it was reinforced on me that the choices I make don't matter, that choice is taken out of my hands. As I write and think this I flash back to the time when as a kid mom and I were on the run from my father, he tracked us down and told us it was time to come home. I was terrified and didn't want to go back. My mom asked me what I wanted, but she must have heard something different. She not only decided to go home with the man that had tracked us down with mob connections and a shotgun, but later told me that when she asked us kids what we wanted that we said we just wanted to go home. I don't think that's right anymore. I don't believe that, even if she did ask a little kid what to do then or at any other time, that these were my choices. I don't remember clearly, just little flashes, but they don't seem like my choices.

Anyway, fade in from flashback. That was when I was what? Five or Six? History repeats itself, well, repeatedly. Thirty. And a half. Yes, I'm still doing the 'and a half' thing that most people stop doing when they're like, 12.

It was supposed to be a cutting loose thing, I thought I'd finally be a little bit freer from the whims of at least one person when Mom formally moved to Pitts and eventually married Herb. But she hasn't moved out of here, because Herb has got his diapers in a bunch about leaving the house where he grew up, so they haven't moved IN to the house that they had purchased and have owned together for about three and a half months. I have to take care of this dump, which is becoming dumpier (perpetual flood in basement, bits and pieces rotting away), six cats, a bird, two dogs - who are becoming more and more out of control the longer she's away from them --- I'm delivering her mail to her because she hasn't filled out a change of address yet. Running clothes and bits of furniture little by little because he's too cheap to hire movers to get her stuff into this million dollar house they bought.

The arrangement started out with me getting to live here until I could get things turned around and take care of the place. The arrangement is really that I'm on permanent standby for whatever they might need 70-80 miles away. No where else to live or go. No jobs to be had, thanks Mr. Bush, if I had time to have one because of my interstate taxi service and dog sitting arrangement.

I'm ranting. Okay. Breeaatthheeee... Ah. Anyway, the situation is (as usual) much, much more complicated than that. But looking at your question six or seven months later, about why I have no motivation? It hits me. There have been people and situations in my life that have negated every decision I've ever made for myself. No wonder I can't decide what to do or feel up to doing anything. Life is a series of choices, and those choices get narrower as you get older. I've had a lot of help in accelerating that process. My choices don't seem to matter very much. School. Work. Relationships. Where I live. How I live. There's always someone pulling my strings or something in the way.

I hate to sound like a whiner. Everyone has obstacles, things get in the way, things fall apart, the will or whim of others bearing down on them in some way. It's just been so constant with me. I never get to decide. So is it a big surprise that I don't know how to decide? And now I just get tired of fighting against all of it. So I'm just along for the ride, you know? A couple of days ago I realized that I'm a tourist in my own life. Wish I had a better view.

Anyway... I'm fine, how are you? Seriously, how are you? Keeping busy? Still in one piece? I'm about to go off and feel guilty for only contacting you when I'm about to go ballistic.

Wow... re-reading that, I really didn't mean to go off like that. Sorry. I'm just a little isolated at the moment and so when I get to express, I express a bit much.

You have a tattoo now? How big is it? Feet all better or no? Still got the 'new' job?

*whew*
Good to hear from ya, darlin', no matter how ballistic ya are. Ya know, I HOPE ya know, that I love ya. You're special to me in a strange way, maybe the way I love the part of myself that's soooo fu**in' good at rationalizing everything. 'Cause we have that in common.

Tattoo: Kokopelli playing to the sky, on the back of my neck, about 4-5"tall I guess.

New job: yeah, still got that one and also have started my own business. All is fan-fuckin'-tastic (seriously) and I've also met the guy I was waiting for. Small glitches there (he lives in PA) but it's intense.

Choices: I hesitate to write this now because I figure you might just *POOF* for another section of a year, but I've gotta or not be me. Choices: you were a kid once and your mom made choices for you. You're not a kid any more. It's just your preference to stay in that mode, and it's easier. But c'mon. Don't try to bullshit a bullshitter.... your life belongs to you. It's easier to live as if you're under control of other people's whims. I know. Been there, done that. Sucks to have to accept responsibility for your own destiny. But it's also very empowering. Read all my journal entries if you wanna see what I mean by that. It's loooong and mostly mundane, but I think you'll get the idea. Notice the change in my byline? That was my toast to the new year. Providence.... it happens. Just gota watch for it and catch it when it flips. Courage.... that's the hardest part. Doesn't mean being fearles, hell, it's not courage unless you're afraid. Then it's bravado or just plain audacious. Happiness... it's there inside you. Nobody else can touch it and only you can unleash it. Scary shit, eh? But potent. Peace... well, that's my mission. In myself first. And I think I can make it extend outside me. We'll see.

Now I have to stop for tonight, not typing so hot (was out at the boy bars whupping ass at pool and am far too cocktailed to make much sense at the moment. But hope, honey.

Chose hope. Remember Pandora and her box? It's what was left after all the other crap set itself free. And it has the greatest weight. And the box is yourself, your heart, your soul. Open it again.

Hey, the thought occurs to me... any reason we can't use e-mail so that I'm not making a constant ass of myself in front of the whole world every time I feel like venting? [email protected]

Yeah, yeah. I guess I'm just chafing under the responsibility of not just chucking everything and putting up with being someone's whipping boy. I can't turn my back on this stuff now because it's an all or nothing type of thing so I'm stuck with it.

Funny thing is, the MoGPCHP in my head said almost exactly the same thing before I read your reply. Sorry, but you've become part of the internal process of calming me down when I'm totally ticked or crazy - yes, I've got a pocket MoG simulator in my head.

I'll try to stay in touch more, learn more about this business of yours and stuff, maybe the e-mail will help.

MMM

A pocket MoG simulator in your head.... that's scary. Does it vibrate? Maybe we can patent the durned thing and become rich beyond our wildest dreams. I think it's fueled by cosmicpolitans.

I'm about to get ready for work but will fire an empty email to ye just to ope the lines of communication, O MMM who has more email addys than there are in the sea.