h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Morning Vim
Re your last post,how did you know that? Got me under surviellance?
Turns out there's none of that going on around here,i bailed out of the boozer about 12 and the missus stayed till 3 with r mu. Think i need more practice...i'm starting to get out of shape.
Congratulations on another Title.
Have we got the toffs in the play offs?

i before e etc...
Can't wait till Wednesday, I know what's coming about with bus w*nkers but i still can't wait.
Couple more of my faves include;Star Stories,there was a blinding one about Kate Moss the other day,and also Scrubs,one of the few yank comedies i enjoy.
I'm bored sh*tless over here,the usual procession of Sunday morning horse riders trotting past our house killed my lie in,missus is comatose,no-one to talk to...looks like i'm cooking dinner

Afternoon Natch
Yep it's the Toffs First leg on Tuesday(if it's two legs)away at Windsor.
My Missus is a Technician at the local girls school and they had a new teacher start at christmas who's from Australia or New Zealand. Her other half who's also antipodean,is supposedly a professional Footballer and he's on trying to find a club.He's had trial Swindon
and now he's sniffing around the sagheads!
Getting moaned at the missus want the laptop
Speak later mate
Vim

Evening Natch
Yeah I love star stories,another laugh out loud comedy.
Did you see the Heather Mills one where Paul McCartney was a massive massive bastard and when they did the Beatles at Abbey Road Macca did the where's your tool bit from Scum to John Lennon and they were playing Oasis in the background.

Don't like the Beatles much and Oasis even less as all they are is a Beatles tribute act.

Never got into Scrubs as it started around the same time as Green Wing and I maybe unfairly compared the two.

Not much of a fan of American comedy anyway.Never seen an entire episodes of Friends and never want to.

The only thing I did get into for a while was My Name Is Earl but that was about 3 or 4 series in and I nearly always fell asleep cos I watched the late repeat.
Give me good old English puerile toilet humour anytime

Oh and Oxford didn't make play offs 's

just read your post from yesterday and noticed you left your missus
in the pub with "r mu" Is that one of the Justified Ancients of Mu Mu?
Do they drive an ice cream van?
Sorry mate I don't usually like to pick up on other peoples typo's
But couldn't resist that one

Afternoon Natch
I was sorry to hear Steven Hawking has not been well.
I'm no expert but has anyone tried turning him off and turning him on again?

Man pulls wife into bedroom and he rips her clothes off
"Now darling do a hansdstand against the full length mirror"

"Hmmmm," she thinks "Kinky.....I like it"

She does the handstand and her hubby pulls her legs apart and rests his chin on her privates.

"The boys down the pub were right," he says "a goatie would suit me!"

Afternoon Vim
Kind of a typo in the sense i should have put a capital M in Mu,but the rest of it was perfeck Bristle speak,proper like. There are some famous books that have been out for years in our area,the most famous one is: Krek Waiters Peak Bristle. [Correct Way To Speak Bristol]. For more insight type in 'Terry the odd job man' into youtube,some of his vids go on a bit but most of them he hits the nail on the head.

Always next year for your workmates lot then comments such as "well you know what they say,the table don't lie" are sure to go down a treat.

I've seen all the Star Stories and yeah the Mills/McCartney is one of the best out there,not sure if i've seen a bad one yet. Total stupidity.

Oasis and The Beatles were o.k in my book,no more than that.

My name is Earl started brightly for me but then it seemed to tail off,still watchable though.

If this Aussie/Kiwi bloke is "supposedly a footballer" then he should fit in nicely at r****s,they're supposed to be footballers but that's about it

Catch you later if you're about mate
Natch

Re your joke.

A man and his wife are at marraige counselling because they haven't been getting on,not even talking.

The counsellor says "Can you either of you tell me what you have in common?"

After a long pause the man says:


"Well neither of us sucks c*ck!"

I just wanted to get the 50th post on

Wayheyyy!!!!!! I didn't notice that we were 50 today

Happy 50th

I've just realised that we've got millions of smileys to play with down here!!

Is it possible to communicate using smileys only do you think?



thats me running to the bog after eating and drinking that lot

Don't think they do a smiley for what's coming next,haven't been at the again have you?

How's your by the way?

Is the rough area round your way St Pauls?
I've got got some jokes but I doubt Rosehill or Blackbird Leys mean much to you so if you let me Know your favourite rough area I'll amend accordingly.

I hate the girlfriends
Yappy little annoyence. I can't be mean to it though cos she turns into a

Bastard cat was sick on the front room carpet last night and I trod on it in the dark and had to clean it up.Puked up on armchair as well(cat not me)

Kind of,St pauls is the area for our ethnic brethren,crack city etc.
The local rough spot around by us is Larwence Weston or Southmead.
We are very well to do...Coombe Dingle dont you know!

Did it go up between your toes?