h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm sure it is. And if it's not, you would be the first. And you'd be a mighty fine one at that

When I next see him, I'll kick him.

Relationship advisor and fashion guru. I'm pretty much the perfect man. My wife'll be very surprised.

I wouldn't tell her if I were you. The news that her husband is both a fashion guru and a relationship expert may be a little too much for her to take at the same time. Or ever.

Yeah plus she might want me to go shopping and help her when her friends phone her up with relationship problems. I can't be doing with all that.

But isn't that what husbands are for? That's the only reason I'm so desperate for one.

I've kicked HM, and revealed my worst traits to him. I feel it's make or break time for our marriage.

As long as you don't mind your husband being very reluctant, stroppy and sulking whenever you drag him round the shops then yes that's exactly what we're for.

In exchange we usually demand to watch the football but you'd be cool with that so I guess your husband will have to find some other thing to bargain with.

You haven't been taken in the cull have you? It's all kicking off on the main thread.

No I'm still here! As I've been remarkably well behaved, I wouldn't expect to be taken in the cull I'm a good girl you know!

I'm sure my future husband will find a bargaining tool of some sort ... although I will naturally obsrtuct this process for as long as possible.

I thought it would have been a little harsh. I thought I might get taken when I foolishly posted a rather unsubtle innuendo. Sometimes I just don't think.

So far I haven't found any bloke related things that you dislike so it might be hard for Mr CCE to find a bargaining tool. What's your opinion on cricket or the darts?

I really like darts, and enjoy 20/20 and one days more than test matches, but happily watch all three

Am I perfect?

You may well be damn you! Hmm what about fishing? It's not my bag but some blokes use it as excuse to get out the house at weekends.

Don't damn me! I am what I am!

Fishing doesn't interest me, although it might be quite fun to go along and actually have a go.

I went sea fishing once. It was horrible, I spent the whole time praying I wouldn't catch anything.

Why did you go if you didn't want to catch anything? Oh! You're scared of fish, aren't you? Fishing seems like a strange choice of 'sport' for you.

Do you find it a bit wierd that you and me are telling the others to clam down and behave themselves over there? Slightly hypocritical of us maybe?

Yeah it's a bit like Steve Gerrard saying there's no place for diving in football. I liked the reply I got from the editors. I feel like some kind of ambassador.

As for the fishing it was when I was on scout camp and I couldn't really get out of it. I couldn't even convince one of the older kids to smuggle on some booze so we could just get hammered on the boat.

ITS ME!!! I'm in pre-mod.

What on earth is happening?

I know we've both been a bit dumb in the past, but it is actually possible to have a nice time without offending people, isn't it? And even more fun sticking in smutty comments that nobody else seems to notice

Sea fishing with scouts sounds like a nightmare.

It was. The sight of all those fish haunts me to this day. Everyone else had the mackerel they caught for dinner. I think I just went to the tuck shop and had an overdose on Highland Toffee.

Who is the pre-moderated one by the way?

Oh and hi GFC.

Hello Beardy.

How have things been today?