h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Did you ever consider that some people may actually like herring?

Er, no?

mm.. herring? .. I'm not sure I like the smell of that .. for a few days..

I'm quite sure it won't spread over internet. And besides, I am not voiceless yet.

*sniff* oh good

you're right .. no herring smell here

Not here either.

ah.. I thought you'd just eaten a few .. well, never mind

Herring-therapy is "outside only", as I said.

oh.. you just .. paste it on? herring? how does that work? do you tie a herring round your neck? amazing!!

Yep, herring compress around neck.

And this does what, beside making you smell fishy (and finding an excuse not to *Eat* the thing )

Cures the throat.

Any better than, say, a warm scarf?

Yep. Actually even better than cabbage leaf.

I think you're aiming too low. Food goes through your *mouth*

Is it you claiming that herring is food?

Well, if you're silly enough to *buy* the things, you should live with the consequences and grit your teeth, write your will, and *eat* the things