Journal Entries
Hey ya!
Posted May 28, 2000
Wazup? I aws just thinking. I know that that is a rare occurence! 
!
But really, I started thinking about my life and the direction that it is heading. I thought about the goals that I have and my dreams. And I asked myself "Where is my life going? What are my goals? How can I turn my dreams into reality?" and my answer to all of them is a big fat "I don't know!"
And why is it that good things always come in pairs? Which makes a problem for me. Like, I know these two girls which i am really interested in getting to know better, but i'm not sure if it's is right to go after both at the same time. And if it isn't, then how am i supposed to chose. And why should i have to chose? couldn't i just make one into a good friendship?
And why is it that my friend just falls asleep right when i really want to talk and discuss things? I know that it isn't his fault, but, talking to someone is infinetly better than just typing into a glowing screen, by way of a loud keyboard and humming computer.
Cornbread! Ain't nutin wrong with that! Ciao!
~Tyler
(This journal has been brought to you by the number 7 and the letter H)
Discuss this Journal entry [6]
Latest reply: May 28, 2000
Wasup?
Posted May 27, 2000
Hiya, I had an insight earlier. Here is the jist of it.
Well, I was on the phone with Tash, comforting her, and I asked her why she didn't want to try and fix things between her and Luke. So she said that she didn't want to 'cause it hurt so much breaking up with him in the first place, and that if they did fix it up just to break up later, it would hurt even more. Now this comment triggered a memory of mine. A memory of Sara telling me how hard it would be to say goodbye to me when she moves, and how sad she will be. And from a bunch of things that Tash has told me (which i can't say 'cause she told me in secrecy) and from a bunch of things that I have observed and deduced, I have noticed that she still has feelings for me. So what I was thinking is that Sara broke up with me because she only wanted to deal with a little bit of pain, instead of alot of pain if we had continued going out and had developped a closer relationship (which I honestly think could of and maybe would of happened).
Well, that was my insight, believe it, blow it off, call me a crack bitch whore, whatever, but that is what I think.
Also, I hope that she started going out with Brandon because she honestly thinks that something could develop, not just cause she is on rebound, or (what my gut tells me) that she is just trying to run away and forget the pain. You know get some happiness. Maybe she is going out with him because it will never become a serious relationship, and thus not much pain.
I would like you to know that this just isn't me being an egotistical ass and thinking that im so great and that it has to because of me. It is because of all the things that I have observed and my experience in psychology.
But anyways, I gotta go. Ciao!
Discuss this Journal entry [2]
Latest reply: May 27, 2000
Hi, once again!
Posted May 26, 2000
Here is another poem! (it's not finished though)
People are hurt,
They are hurt all the time,
But those people move on,
And that's just sublime,
But this poem is about me,
And I tried to move on with time,
But she is still hurting me,
And she does it without reason nor rhyme.
She gave me a phone call out of the blue,
Which came after a week of awkwardness,
She said we had to talk. About what? I knew,
"I don't think it's working out," said she,
"It would be better just as friends, us two."
And I replied, "If that is what you want."
And then she started to cry and say, "What did I do?"
She cried and said, "What have I done? I'll regret it I will!"
So I stayed on the phone for a half-hour or two,
Comforting her and saying that it was the right thing to do,
For if she wasn't happy then there needed to be a change,
And if it was not seeing me, then that's something i'm happy to do,
But, she didn't understand that,
And she still doesn't today,
She said that she want's to be friends,
But she continually pushes me away,
Now that she has a boyfriend,
I guess she feels that I should just go away.
I used to be friends with her boyfriend,
But he won't or can't even look at me,
Come to think of it,
Neither can she.
And that is the end of part 1!
Ciao!
Discuss this Journal entry [3]
Latest reply: May 26, 2000
Me again!
Posted May 26, 2000
And here is another one of my poems. (It's a Pantoum)
I met a girl today,
With deep green eyes,
And bright red lips,
Which she used to cry.
With deep green eyes,
She looked at me,
Which she used to cry,
As I turned away.
She looked at me,
And with her bright red lips,
As I turned away,
Cried "Why?"
And with her bright red lips,
She moved about,
Crying "Why?"
With her delicate hands.
She moved about,
Making me look at her eyes,
With her delicate hands,
I said to her.
Making me look at her eyes,
And bright red lips,
I said to her,
"I met a girl today."
Ciao!
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: May 26, 2000
Hello!
Posted May 26, 2000
Here is a little poem i wrote.
I hope you like it.
I want to speak with my shadow,
I want to fly into the darkness,
For the light is pain.
I want to destroy my mind,
I want to hide behind a mask,
For reality is pain.
I want to hate my peers,
I want to close my eyes,
For love is pain.
I want to break down and cry,
I want to laugh at the stars,
For I am in pain.
I want to leave this God-forsaken house,
I want to escape this dusty realm,
For in it is pain.
Ciao!
Discuss this Journal entry [1]
Latest reply: May 26, 2000
Slade
Researcher U114903
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