h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You mean that the italics are part of a campaign to . . . to . . . shut down h2g2?!!!

You don't think that they've been lobbied over, or perhaps blackmailed, by the people over in Collective do you?

It's a distressing idea, certainly. For the moment I must say I have trust in Jimster though. Let us wait for more evidence to present itself lest we act rashly.

But if we leave it for too long then it may be too late to stop this fiendish plot.

Don't worry. I'm sure if we get together a band of intrepid yet unlikely volunteers we can save the day in the nick of time.

Then they'll put up statues to us and everything, I'm telling you it'll be great.

A statue? Of little old me?

Of all of us. Striking heroic poses, too.

And I suppose we'll be big and muscle-bound?

We will. We'll have chins you could crack rocks on and more muscles than an ox. We will also be striking clearly contemplative poses to show that we despite our statures, we also have a greater intellectual capacity than an ox.

There will probably be confetti. Don't tell anyone.

So essentially they'll be statues of big musclebound men, with the names changed to sound more heroic. I don't see where we come into this at all.

They'll be our names. And we won't be musclebound out of proportion, of course. It's just that if you slip the sculptor a fiver he'll give you bigger biceps, that sort of thing.

And if I sliped him 500?

He'd nick a statue of Zeus and put your name on it.

Yeah but all those types of statues have little wossnames.

I think I'll take a rodin-style-sculpture-type statue of me.

They've got strength and contemplation.

That may well be a wise choice. Either that or a strategically placed loincloth.

With wings on it?

:D yes and a figleaf pattern.

Ooh

No fig trees around here, see.

Perhaps they'll grow some in our honour.

To keep us in the shade and to provide a nourishing snack at the same time?