h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You've heard that old saying that the reason babies are so cute is so we won't kill them? Well, it seems to me that the reason old people get so selfish, crabby and dependent is so we'll be relieved when they finally die and not grieve quite so much.

Lady C and I made a pact years ago. If I saw her turning into our mother, I was to shoot her immediately. And vice versa. It seemed reasonable at the time. Then she took the easy way out and died before Mother and left me to deal with her on my own. I am trying to be patient with her, honest. But you need to understand that she wasn't a happy, pleasant person when she was young. Old age certainly hasn't improved her disposition. The woman is on a perpetual quest for things to be upset about.

*pounds head against wall*

*pads all walls*

*provides in a non-spill, smashproof container*

I know this one, Hyp. Hang in there.

When my nephew, who's a fine fellow, was 18 months old, his mother warned him about his behaviour:

'Stop that right now. In a few months, you'll be bigger - and that won't be cute any more.'

Try to remember her as she was, engulfed in purple smoke.

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Oh Hyp, I do sympathise. It is so frustrating, and if you are anything like me you feel a little guilty when you get cross, yet you shouldn't. I too think they get grumpy so we don't find it so hard when they go, much like grumpy teenagers make the partings easier!

Try to remember to feel for her, it can't have been much fun being that miserable all her life.

Would a ease the pain of banging your head against the wall

You can get me on email any time the frustration and anger is about to bubble over. Sometimes venting it can help.

Websailor

Hubby Aaron's mum, Lorna, was just the same, Hyp. His brother used to call her 'greedy' when she stayed with him. I think that's quite accurate, though not in the same nasty way he meant it.

Her husband had died young (at 58) and she lived, not entirely *through*, but as a result *of* her children.

The last to leave, Aaron, was forever being called upon to come and see her in the middle of night when she was feeling down/slightly poorly. Yup I resented that, Lorna's daughter was much nearer (about 20 mins, as opposed to 'our' hour and a half*

Families, can't live with 'em and you can't bury 'em under the patio. There's something called a 'Law' about it, apparently.



* 'our' hour and a half would include, making sure Aaron was ok to drive, the MS sometimes makes that it difficult to at times as well as the actual getting there. Sometimes he'd even ask his sister to go in his stead, but she'd refuse for some spurious reason or other.

Oh, how we laughed when the will was read and she got about buggarall.

Once again I have been Modded

Illigitimi non carborundum. (Seems appropriate).

Rats. I missed the modded post. were you being naughty again, RJR?

Thanks Websailor. I may take you up on your offer.

Mags, I only live 10 minutes from her. I can't use the excuse that it's too far to drive over there. But the late night panicy phone calls are spot on. Last night she needed a dressing changed on her hand and was mad because I hadn't left her any bandages.She had a squamous cell carcinoma cut of of it last Thursday. Her ointment and bandages were sitting right next to the telephone. It's stuff like that that makes me crazy. And the phone calls right when I'm rushing to get ready for work. She knows how to time calls so they are as inconvenient to me as possible. She calls me at the library all the time - never when I have time to talk to her.

That's great advice, Lil. The purple smoke incident was a classic!

yup its the only way

Lorna used to call me at lunchtime, when Aaron was on his way. At the time I was a Midday Assistant at the school. She knew that and knew I couldn't even answer the phone. She'd leave the most peevish of messages*. When I saw her in person she was lovely, though.










*I've still got the one she left on the day she died. She sounded desperate (she was ) she'd done it so often, though, that we were all immune, except Aaron. He was on his way and couldn't get in when he got there (she'd left her keys in the door so no-one could open it from the other side). He had to break the window, called an ambulance, couldn't get back for our son in time. It was a terrible, mass of mistakes from everyone else in the family. Ah well.

That sounds just horrible, Magwitch. I have often wondered if people stop and think, 'That's what everyone will remember about me.'?

If they did, I think they might behave differently.

Sorry to hear about your situation.

When did your sister die?

YB

*hands Hyp some cheap China*

*looks at the padded walls*

*stamps foot*

But the floor is still unpadded - go ahead, smash it all up!

Have a , Hyp. No advice from here, my mother in law never calls, even when she really should do.

Dear Hyp,

i am pleased to find you again. I had a few messages last week, then had to go away for a few days, and came back, totally forgetting how to get online again.
Getting old is not for sissies i think.
I was very encouraged yesterday when two charming ladies fromthe the county care for the blind came to see me about how to help me with my computer. They are going to fix special large letters onto the keys.
Hopefully that will make a difference. i think I can touch type,a nd then find I have written lines of gobbledygook. !
Go well,

In the 23rd May i celebrate my 83rd birthday. I am planning on a a virtual party again. I remember the tremendous success of my 75th birthday party. It was one that dear pheloxi arranged for me.

Go well and hope all my h2g2 friends are well.

AlsoRan80
Wednesday 11th May, 2011 2.50 BST


AlsoRan80

I'll come to that party! Do you have any preferences in virtual wine?