h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

...I was going to have a quietish, stress-free day life once again blew me a raspberry. Really, is it too much to ask to have a peaceful day now and again? Apparently it is.

Right. So I started the day with a dog with diarrhea and a cat fight between Rocky and a stray that found the cat flap that left the parts of the throw rug under the coffee table that weren't poo stained with blood and fur.

I had to go to work 3 hours early because of a computerconsultant who was here from out of town. Arrived to find the elevator out of commission and the regular service tech way on family business. So I had to wait for a tech to drive down from Kansas City. He supposedly fixed the problem. Two hours after he left a woman got trapped between floors. So I had to call him and have him walk me through the possible problems and the procedure to reboot the system. The good news is that now I know how to work on the elevator.

In the meantime I had an irate patron who insisted that we are the only library in the US that charges for copies, a woman who needed tax forms for 1992 to the present and was astonished that we don't have them and told her to go to the IRS office, a 10 year-old who was hateful and cursing at the circ clerk because she wouldn't let him into the adult computer lab, a new trustee who is so happy to be on the board that he drops by to chat all the time, and a woman who wanted me to fax a 35 page document to Vienna and was furious when I told her she would have to pay for the international dialing charges. She thought I should charge her the 25¢ per page charge for local faxes and then let her telephone for free to find out if it was received ok.

So I decided that since I went in early, I'd leave at 5. Ha! Likely story. But I did get away by 6. Better than staying until 8. Got home to find that the neighborhood kid who mows and trims for me used the weed whacker on the wrong flower bed. The stray cat was asleep in my recliner and I gotwhatmustbe the twentieth phone call from a man with a heavy Mexican accent who refuses to believe that I don't know anyone named Cubby and therefore can't call him to the phone.

The next time he calls I intend to tell him that I know a Pimms Lettuce, a Waz, a Singing Librarian Owl, an Asteroid Lil, a Witty Moniker, a Gosho, a Bagpuss, a Frenchbean, a Teuchter, an Agapanthus and a seal named Pinniped. (I'll make a list of every unusual or silly name I can think of. Should be a long list.) Coelecanth! Mazin Mad Fiddler. Wilma Neanderthal. I even know a Hoopy Frood. But, I don't know a Cubby.

More silly names for you--2legs, Happy Nerd, paper lady, AlsoRan...

Just tell him that Cubby can't come to the phone right now, He's busy being [insert disgusting sex act, include farm animals and major appliances for bonus points].

Got caller ID? Either block any calls from that number or just don't pick it up when you see that ID on the display.

Daughter #2 is learning all about customer service since she started working at the boardwalk running kiddie rides last weekend. Parents came up to the ride with a kid definitely under age 2. This ride has 2 height restrictions, a minimum height to ride alone and a minimum height to ride with an adult. This kid didn't make either. The mother cursed a blue streak at my daughter, insisting that this child had ridden this ride at least 5 times before. #2 politely informed her that she did not have the authority to make an exception and they would have to speak to a manager. This woman proceeded to tell the manager that it was #2 who did the cursing. Said manager rolled his eyes and stood his ground. Score 1 for the good guys.

Then there was the parent who was 2 tickets short for the ride. He tried to bribe #2 $5.00 to let the kid on the ride, rather than delaying gratification for 5 minutes while purchasing the tickets for a buck.

I had some friends in LA whose phone number was only one away from the number of a local Spanish talk radio station. Watching them deal with that ten times a day was an education

That sounds much more fun than the calls I get (at home) for Redwood Parks Information (which, btw, is nowhere near our home phone number--the same area code and city code, but the last 4 numbers aren't anywhere near--only 1 digit is the same, but not in the same position) People are generally pretty nice about it, though, but that's likely because I tend to go ahead and look up the right number for them I even called back a lady from Texas once who was trying to book a big camping trip a month in advance--after all, she'd left a message on a machine with just the default outgoing message (the darn thing keeps getting unplugged...) after sitting through 7 rings, and I was bored anyway.

for Hyp

...and you also know the Queen of Elves...

Silly names? I see no silly names...

- fat and allergen free, but full of taste!

An Interesting day

The next time Strange Mexican Guy phones looking for Cubby, you could say "Just a moment" and then leave the phone off the hook until he gives in and hangs up at his end

Witty - direct your daughter to http://notalwaysright.com/ and she'll see plenty to confirm that she's not alone in having to deal with stoooooopid people.

Thanks, Teuchter. I forwarded the link to her. It is definitely the type of thing she would enjoy.

That's a great link, Teuchter.

So, I'm waiting for the elevator guy again.

Geez, Hyp, it looks like your day went directly from light drizzle to Hurricane Xavier...

Sorry to hear that, Hyp.

Hope things have taken a turn for the better.

Sends Hyp a cuppa of the ol' EG

and remember to put your feet up! ooOOOoOOOoOoh just impersonate Cubby and say in a really loud voice (I'M DEAF SO PLEASE WRITE TO ME) at this point give the White House address or the C.I.A's Or F.B.I's or the local extream religious groups address, it's easy to effect a quiet day after a little effort to attain bliss


RJR you know it makes sence

Things aren't a bed of roses today, either. I'm starting my vacation a day early so I can conduct an emergence replacement of my dishwasher and disposal. I've known for a while that it was down the road, but this morning it reached critical mass. *sighs*

Thanks for the RJR. Just the thing.

*slurpppp's EG*


No prob's mate


RJR

Haveyou ever tried the EG Cream ? It's a bit lighter on the bergamot oil.

Oh, and I have a brand shiny new dishwasher. 'Tis lovely. I have to wait until tomorrow afternoon for the plumber to hook it up, though. *taps foot impatiently*

Is the delivery service not licensed to do that?

B'el, I went to a builder's supply place to buy it. My cousin took me in his van. We brought it back with us. It depends on where you buy things whether installation is included. At this place, it isn't. So I need my regular plumber to come over and do that.

EG cream? Never heard of it, sounds very interesting. Who makes it?
Have you tried Lady Grey? It's made by Twinings, has a lighter more fragrant flavour. (If a flavour can be said to be fragrant).

I also wouldn't mind some of David's tasty, fat and allergen free chocolate. I've never seen that before either

I did a dealing with difficult people workshop this week. Sounds lame, but was actually quite good. I found it the most useful training I've ever done with work. I'm doing the advanced workshop next week, as I was so good in the role-plays, the instructor said the advanced one would really benefit me. The role-plays were done with actors playing the part of patrons and no scripts (of course). This was much better than us doing the roll plays with each other. It was like dealing with a real person.
The company that run these workshops is run by ex-cops, so they kinda know what they're talking about.

Hyp, I can only hope your days get better.