h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*The apparition lands in the middle of the Dealer's Area, next to an alien that manages to look the part of a classic nerd. The nerd blinks but doesn't show any other indication that he may be surprised.*

Whooooo, this looks fun....

*He begins examining the nerd's collection of odds, ends, and doodads.*

[Yar lands nearby and looks around] Hmm ... interesting.

*Affy, looking a few good years younger than he does these days, strolls by, looking very distracted and not really noticing Yar. He buys a Venn Singularity Shield by trading in a quarter, two nickels, and a few soda pop tabs that look enough like alien currency to probably not inconvenience the alien who accepts them any*

[Yar glances at the younger Affy, decides that he might be too young to recognize Yar, then shrugs and decdes not to bother him and potentially create a temporal paradox. He casts his senses about to see if the hench-ninja has arrived anywhere near here.]

*The apparition gets bored with the odds and ends, and floats through Yar. He grins; a strange, childish grin.*

Isn't this magnificent?

Ooooh, what's that....

*He floats off in another, quite random direction. Most likely toward something very shiny.*

*A humanoid, though vaguely clawed, hand somehow sneaks up on Yar in a manner that proves to be surprisingly effective at sneaking up on Force users (but man, is it goofy to look at, and clumsy against absolutely anything else.) The hand taps Yar on the shoulder. The hand belongs to a figure in a cloak and a hood, whose face is obscured by a very bizarre looking alien breathing device*

Figure-Jedi, yes? A rare Terran Jedi, no less? What brings you to this one of a kind convention center, and the only convention it has ever hosted, and will ever host from now until now?

[Yar apparently isn't the least bit startled, either by the apparition's passing through him, or the cloaked alien, since he doesn't actually use the Force in this incarnation. He turns to face the alien.]

A Jedi? Heh, only for laughs. Won't say I've got a few tricks up my sleeve, though. I followed that apparition that just floated through me cuz I was curious about this place.

[He keeps a mental eye out for the apparition.]

*The apparition is sitting about ten feet directly above Yar, reading some sort of brochure as ten or so other brochures float around him.*

*He momentarily loses a little focus, and one of the brochures falls down on Yar. If one were to read it, they'd discover it is for the company "Spishack, Inc."*

[Yar looks up at the same instant it starts to fall, almost with a negative reaction time, and catches it.]

*The figure nods*

Figure-But you don't deny being Terran, then? Might you, perhaps, be on your way to Earth soon? I'm trying to get there, and my hitchhiking skills are not what they could be. Alien breathing devices are apparently about as well-regarded as hook hands, peg legs, eye patches, and chainsaws 'round these parts.

[arches an eyebrow] Maybe, though I think I might need to hitch a lift myself. What's your name? And, uh, is there a reason for going to Earth that you're comfortable sharing?

*The figure coughs a few times, then turns back to Yar*

FIgure-You see, I was born on Earth. A long time ago, however, I was abducted by an alien presence. I've had to undergo some bizarre surgeries to survive in some of the more truly alien regions of space and time that I've been voyaging through in my attempts to return. It's alright if you don't have a ride just yet; it's been so long now that a little more waiting won't kill me.

[Yar psychically attempts to Detect Lie with his psycic repoirtoir, and also a quick scan would make it obvious whether or not he's human. Success or failure takes half a second.]

*grumbles and uses Typo Soap on that last post* My kingdom for an "edit" button ...

*Yar detects no lies, and the DNA structure is human with a few superficial genetic alterations here and there*

[Yar can't detect actual DNA, but the mind looks human, in that case!]

[Yar] [nods] Sounds cool. My name's Yar Kramer. You?

*The figure chuckles*

Figure-Milos Triton was my given name. I've gone with others over time. Kigh-Elle was the last name I assumed to blend in. Doesn't seem much point now, though, as a healthy percentage of these time travellers are human anyway. So Milos will do.

[Yar] Pleased to meet you, Mil .......

[Something clicks.]

[Yar] [slowly] KL?

Milos-Eh?

[Yar turns his lie-detection on full blast and focuses it on Milos, poker face at 100%] Would one of the other names you've had happen to be "Minos Krylma"?