h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Right. First tap dance rehearsal tonight for Steppin' Out, and amateur Dramatic production I got through the auditions for recently. (Front row seats? Let me know how many you want)

28 people chasing 10 final cast slots.

Tonight consisted of the choreographer telling us what shoes we need, and what to wear to rehearsals - leotard and tights. I fear that morning jogs are required ASAP to shed the pounds I need to in order to feel even vaguely confortable in such an unforgiving ensemble.

Steps tonight were very basic shuffles and taps. The dancing was pretty easy - I still feel that's where I'm at my best, and I managed some useful eye contact with the choreographer.

As for the competition...there are a couple of other good dancers, although one is surely far too young to meet the specified age range (25-45)...she was talking about persuading her Mum to buy her some new tap shoes

*Decides to keep quiet about dancing on stage in public in Dido and Aeneas, New Moon, the Boyfriend and Carmen*

If I am in Lux I will buy a ticket. When is the show?

*Clickety-clackety-clickety-clackety-clickety-clackety-click*

*tries to picture Bob tap-dancing*

*mind balks at the concept*

B

*Mind crashes at the concept of himself tap-dancing*

Wzzsskkksdjkfds

Thank you fans,

Show will be late November, but I intend to jot down a few thoughts after each rehearsal on here. So you'll probly be bored sick of it by then

I have a feeling I may be busy that night in late November.
I will wait for the video and CD.

Had to buy the leotard and tights yesterday.

Was SOOO not looking forward to seeing myself in unforgiving black lycra. Even the BJBKs* are no good, as they just push the flab into a different place.

First I tried a long sleeved low backed number, which looked awful. And I thought there's no way I can dance in long sleeves, I'll be far too hot and sweaty. Meanwhile my spotty back is not what the world wants to see. And you can't wear a bra with a backless number.

But the (very helpful) assistant rumaged around in her storeroom and found a simple round necked short sleeved number which was not too horrific.

I'm still jogging in the morning though


*BJBKs - Bridget Jones Big Knickers

Monday 5.5.03

Jogged
After various futile attempts to attach the heel irons myself with a big hammer and tiny wee nails, took tap shoes to cobblers and paid them 5 euros to do the job properly.

Getting anxious about the fact that I'll miss 2 rehearsals at the end of May - hope they don't kick me out .

Blimey, you have cheap cobblers in Luxembourg, don't you?

*thinks that there must be joke lying around here somewhere*

B

5 euros to fiddle with 6 wee screws? Specially when you've got the proper equipment an everything? Bargain! See, a smile is valid currency all over the world


Last night's rehearsal...thankfully there were quite a few of us old biddies who really really didnt enjoy wearing leotards, so I didnt feel too embarassed. The standard of dancing is very high - everyone is getting the steps really quickly. I'd been admiring this tall blond woman who'd obviously done a lot of tap before, and I was thrilled when the choreographer picked me and her to stand in a mini front line of 2

Legs are aching this morning though, couldnt face jogging. Rubbed some Lush Wiccy Magic Muscles on them last night when I got in, which helped.

Thursday 9.5.03

Great rehearsal. Nearly everyone's in the requisite uniform, so we all look like a proper dance class. Again, he's going very fast (he's got 6 months to get us up to required standard), and everyone is working hard, and getting all the moves. Tough competition! I dont envy the director's task of whittling us down.

We started work on the Finale routine, which is to a beautiful medley of Gershwin music. Had to imagine wearing top-hats and carrying a cane. The blond girl obviously has done a lot of tapping, as she was the only one who could do it up to speed! I kept doing my hop steps on the wrong foot - must practise.

Also have to exercise our smiling muscles, which is a bit of a strain.

Gave the black girl a lift home, as after 25 degrees today it bucketted tonight.

Saturday 10.5.03
(which means Thursday couldnt have been the 9th )

The big blond girl is obviously his favourite, as he now puts her in a super front line of her own. Well quite right too, she can do all the tricky moves up to speed .

Got our canes today "Me ole bamboo, me ole bamboo...."
I'm completely confused now with not just feet to co-ordinate but also heads and smiles and hands (inclduing different overhand and underhand holds)and this bloody stick

Practise time....

Any plans to turn this legacy into an Entry, 'Star?

I'm sure the Post would snap it up.

B

Wednesday 14.05.03


I thought you'd like to know, I've got this terrible pain in all the muscles down my left shin.


Muscles? On your shin? But there are no muscles on your shin!


Yes. That's what makes it so painful.


It's the same kind of ache you get after roller blading or ice skating. Feeling very tired, bloated, time-of-the-month-y last night so I stood at the back of the class. Also wanted to see how everyone else is getting on

Added a lovely graceful slow bit with sways and turns (to Someone to watch over me) in the Gershwin Finale, and also added some cute easy to do but very effective shuffle ball change stuff in the Happy Feet number. I even managed to have my cane in the right place at the right time

11pm - just in after tonight's rehearsal. 2 days in a row - what a killer.

Well it was Murder on the Dancefloor! The choreographer (self-styled Tap Nazi) arrived very stressed out, so I offered him some of my relaxing pulse point oil. Gave it to some of the other girls too, who then accused me of drugging them, trying to make them too floppy to dance...

Blond superdancer wasnt there tonight, so I popped into the front row. B fell over trying to do a tricky turn, and we all were watching her, missing Tap Nazi's magnificent spin (so he says) in the process.

Added some Busby Berkley style running in a circle, opening out one arm - I want a feather head-dress! - to Embracable You.

Skipped my half-time fag as it was hailing outside. (Would somebody please inform whoever's in charge of the weather that it's June in 2 weeks?)

And then, at the end, as I was putting my shoes on, the Tap Nazi came over to me and asked me to perform the routine solo as one of the guys wanted to video it for practice purposes. So I had to do it in front of 20 murderous pairs of eyes. And of course I mucked up that tricky shuffle hop with the cane. But I was thrilled to have been singled out

Off to massage my aching feet with lavendar cream....

My older brother used to be a part-time doctor, part time contemporary dancer. But hes getting old now (40) so hes given up the dancing to concentrate on the doctoring...

40 IS NOT OLD!!!!!!!!


Ahem, sorry.

I honestly didnt mean to put old, I meant older. He's my brother, I dont think of him as old... And his 25yr old g/f obviously doesnt either...

25?! Dirty old man...

...Sorry, not 'old' - er - I meant 'dirty young man'. Er...

I'll get me coat.

B