h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have often travelled on buses when they often reeked of cannabis. Most bus travellors in cities must have passively smoked cannabis. The law has been relaxed on smoking such substances but No one seems to bother about the poor bus travellor who doesnt want to inhale such drugs.

This may sound like an appalling bit of moral cowardice, but on some routes traveling through places like Moss Side or Longsight or Levenshulme, it is safer to put up and say nothing if the tang of cannabis reaches your nostrils. You never know how the local wildlife will react if confronted.

Although I was once on a 192 bus where an elderly white lady confronted three black lads in hoodies who were smoking a joint... her demand that they "put that cigarette out RIGHT NOW!" was met with immediate compliance and muttered "sorry" noises acompanied by shuffles of embarrassment.

Worst 192 journey ever? One where a large black man was high as a kite on something, and was paranoid, and was accussing people of dissing him and thinking he was trash. (It was noticeable this big bugger was putting the frighteners on white people travelling on the bus, as if he had some sort of grudge) This in between frequent sniffing noises suggesting the ultimate culprit was something ingested nasally. Again, it was a mixture of cowardice and relief - while this guy was getting verbally agressive with others, I was thanking the powers it wasn't me, while at the same time discreetly (and out of his line of sight) loosening up a bottle of wine in the bag I was carrying, in case I had to clock the drugged-up git out of self-defence. I was remembering what the Army had taught me about using a baton in a riot-control situation, and the practice I'd had in Northern Ireland, and steeling myself up to "restraining" this person if he got violent. (the ideal place to hit is where the neck meets the shoulder - a good hard thump here and you've incapacitated your rioter without causing permanent damage)

Fortunately, the out-of-control one lurched off in Longsight. Deep relaxing breaths, let go of neck of bottle.

I saw his face again - in the Manchester Evening News - some months later: sent down for offences involving drugs and violence. (Why was I not surprised?)