h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've been thinking about the subject of resistance. We (people in general and me in particular) seem to spend a lot of time feeling guilty about *stuff to do*, but not actually doing it. This wastes a lot of energy and doesn't get anything done. Stuff to do includes things like taking up the hems of trousers which are too long, taking clothes to the dry cleaners, writing letters, phoning friends, cleaning the fridge, sorting out the cellar, doing 30 minutes of exercise a day, etc. It can sometimes extend to making a meal, when I'm really tired, or even eating it when it's there, on occasion.

All this resistance takes up energy. Recently, I've been improving on my list of things to do. I've written lists of things, cut the things into strips of paper, and put like with like, then made several categorised lists. I suppose it's a bit like divide and conquer. It feels more manageable.

Some things which were difficult, I've managed to do regularly, which is nice, like my morning 30 minute meditation. I've not yet got the second one going regularly.

I think the thing with the exercise is finding a good time to do it. First thing in the morning doesn't seem to work. I can co 5-10 minutes, but not 30 minutes. Maybe I just start with 5 minutes. Roy started with a minimum exercise regime of half a push up, which is now 2 push ups. I've been doing two salutes to the sun most mornings. Although I know it isn't enough, it is a start.

Let's not and say we did.

One of the things I want to do is to look good in my own eyes. That wouldn't cut it!

Send me a scan of your picture and I'll use my paint program.
You're such a new age perfectionist, it makes my ego ache.

Off to forget or hide something so that the balance of the force can be maintained!

Hiya ZSF,

Hey, I need my resistance; it's the only exercise I get!

Oh, perfectionism is one of the achilles heels of Virgos. I really do want to improve the quality of my life, though!

So, ... I send you a scan of my picture and you use your skills to make me look slimmer and fitter? Will it make my house look better too (I'd like a new kitchen and bathroom please!)?

Simulpost, Fords!

Nah. I'm just being a sarcastic horse's rear today.
Shnooks is giving me fits. I got an email from one of her teachers that set off a chain of events. And now I gotsda have another "talk" with the child when she comes home.

Or maybe I won't and say I did.
I'm tired of talking to her.

Oh dear! Sounds like you need a !

What's she done (or not done)?

To make it short: she is not keeping track of her school papers.

Ah, how easy is that to do? Does she have some sort of proforma to keep track of them? If not, is this something you can do together?

And hearing Ringo Starr doing "Fiddle About" is extrememly risible!

Oh, yes, the child.

Proforma? Que?

Anyway, we have accordion filers and binders and folders and stuff for every class.
Her math teacher has been helping her as best she can...

and that is the person who emailed me with a plaintive request for assistance...

which led me to call the principal...

who refered me to Communities In Schools, an organization which takes the child's lunch hour and devotes it to guest speakers and programs about organization and responsibility...

and that group has also arranged to supervise the child at Homework Central, an after-school activity that will see to it that she does her homework and then will place the piece of paper in the teacher's mailbox.

They also offered to inform me if the child doesn't actually make it to the after school program.

What I meant by a proforma (I couldn't think of the actual word I meant) was a schedule you can fill in of what she needs to do and by when. A bit like a calendar or a chart, with tasks, saying by when they are due in, so that she can see at a glance where she stands. You probably do.

It looks as though there is already quite a comprehensive schedule in place.

I can remember from being at school that I had pretty heavy homework each night. Three subjects per night (said to take half an hour each, but in practice taking much longer) and at least double that workload at weekends!

I can remember what it was like being behind on my homework.

"A bit like a calendar or a chart, with tasks, saying by when they are due in, so that she can see at a glance where she stands. You probably do."

Uh. No. I write things on my hand when I remember them...
and if it survives for a couple of days, then I'm doing well...


"I can remember what it was like being behind on my homework."

The best I can understand it, she's not "behind", she's just not turning the work in when she does it, or she's losing the papers or the assignments and not having anything to turn in, or she's going through the motions of doing her homework, but she's not actually learning anything!

I have no math skills, beyond simple addition and subtraction.
It would take me months to become ignorant enough to know where to begin to tell her that I don't know.
With her science, I could help a bit, but she has to ask. I can't read her mind.

Um - does she have a regular pattern to her homework, eg maths and geography on Monday, English and history on Tuesday, etc? You (or she) could do a chart when the assignments are due in.

Or you could have sheets by subject and a list of what's been set, when it's due and when it's actually handed in.

Would that help?

Her maths and science teachers have been sending weekly emails on Monday, detailing all her assignments for the week. I have been printing this out for the child.

We are doing a lot of guessing on this end, and are not having much success.
Interrogating the child produces little, as she is a lawyer.

Guessing because she isn't telling you what she is and isn't doing?

Hmm, short of standing over her while she does the work .... I'm not sure what to suggest. I imagine that you've tried the usual bribes and sanctions. Is she just not interested, or interested, but not enough to make the effort? If she thinks it's a complete waste of time, it will be harder for you.

Hmm. Are you sure it isn't resistence?
I have trouble with those e/a words.

Yes. Well. My problem is that I think teaching algebra and physics to thirteen year olds is a waste of time if they are not learning how to to read and write effectively.

I went to a High School orientation program tuesday night and the principal acts like they are running an institution of higher learning.

Well I can't write properly but I've done very well and science and maths, reading and writting isn't the be all and end all of life is it? I don;t think so any way.

Some people just aren't very good at English but it doesn't mean that they don't have other talents - such as maths.. which is far more fun anyway.

I'm fairly certain that it's resistance. Resistence looks awful. Let's check - - yes, definitely resistance. i was one of those people who regularly used to get 10/10 for spelling. 9/10 was bad and 8/10 was a disaster!

I agree with Z. Not being able to spell accurately doesn't mean that people don't have other talents. However sometimes people are judged on the standard of their written English and sometimes quite harshly. I can remember a letter coming into the an office I used to work in. The spelling was so dreadful that the letter was seen by absolutely everyone, and I can remember the spelling he had of 'certificate' = stifcut! (Actually, there were other issues as well as the spelling). This was a good 15-18 years ago, so the impression has been a lasting one. Little came up with one almost as good as this a couple of weeks ago - he's allowed, he's only 8.

There was a good example of what I mean on the Daily Motivator for Wednesday, January 21, 2004 - see:

http://greatday.com/motivate/040121.html

(you'll have to go back a couple of days).

'Just imagine how much you could accomplish if you could work without the friction of your own negative thoughts.'

And it's true. Our negative thoughts stop us achieving. We put energy into resisting which we could spend achieving!