h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Complementary medicine can help to cope with grief. My first husband died a year after we were married and I was returned to sanity (almost) by some very simple potions and tinctures.

The first thing to turn to is Bach Flower Rescue Remedy - available from all good chemists and health shops nowadays. It helps with panic, shock, grief, fear and the feeling of disconnectedness that comes with all those.

You take a couple of drops on the tongue whenever you feel awful and it helps to calm you down.

There's also Rescue Cream which is not meant to be taken internally. However, at Henry's funeral, my brother stopped me from fainting by rubbing the cream on my wrists and pulse points on my temples (bless him, he was a saint that day).

The Edward Bach Foundation says that it's very important to treat shock as if it is left untreated it turns to depression. Star of Bethlehem is the remedy they use for shock. It is in the Rescue Remedy mix.

Aconite is the homoeopathic remedy for shock. It is also available at chemists nowadays. 200c is best but you may only be able to get 30c or 6c. If so, you may need more than one tablet. One morning and evening for three or four days will help. If you get 200c you will probably only need one or two.

The best homoeopathic remedy for grief is ignatia - take a 200c tablet every time the feeling becomes overwhelming or you cry. Or, again, whateve dosage you can get. It won't hurt you.

The 360 alternative medicine site will soon have a homoeopath on line to answer questions.

Hope this is helpful.

Maggy

My dad passed away very unexpectedly two weeks ago, of a massive heart attack that he first fought but then became too much. I am feeling the raw pain and missing him like mad. He was the most amazing and generous father, my most trusted friend and always fantastic company, full of interest in everything and everyone... It is only now that the fact that he is gone is really sinking down, after the funeral and all the practicalities that must be arranged. In addition, I live in the UK and he lived in the Basque Country- getting back to normal is proving testing. While trying to get hodl of my life again, the one thing that is really being my lifeline is my yoga practice: I would recommend it to everyone. You can start with restorative poses to regain energy and boost your inmune system, inversions to fight the dark thoughts and when you feel a bit stronger, standing poses to build up stamina and backneds to opne your chest and lift your mood. An experienced teacher will know which poses suits you best during this exhausting time. Breathing work will also help you calm your mind (it saved me from fainting during the funeral). I have years of practice, but the results after resuming my practice this week have been dramatic. The Iyengar method is particularly good in its therapeutic approach and respect of the changing nature of the human body and soul. Even so soon after the loss, it is very important to care of your body and soul, and this method of yoga will help you to feel much better physically and calmer emotionally. Just remember to listen to your body if you feel weak or overwhelmed and let your teacher know how you are feeling before the class. The pain might take a long, long time to subside, but taking care of yourself through a nurturing yoga practice will really help you to feel calmer and stronger quicker.
If anyone wants to know where to find an experience Iyengar yoga teacher, the web has great resources for centres and individual teachers.
I hope this helps.