h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

While we waited for our plane in the Honolulu Airport, I asked Orp if he ever got tired of dealing with skittish tourists like me.

He laughed. "Some are so scared they pull out entirely. Your hang-gliding was fine. As for whether I get tired of it, in the snowy season I go to Alaska to coach tourists who want to go dog-sled racing. I've competed in the Iditarod race -- which will be held next March 5th -- but nowadays I stay busy enough helping tourists who just want the dog-sled experience."

The flight from Honolulu to Tijuana was "only" 6 hours. As our plane left the runway, I found myself sitting next to Juan Donaldson, the tour guide who would make sure everything went smoothly when we got to our destination. With his business suit and British accent, he was hardly what I had pictured a Mexican tour guide to look and sound like.

When I told him so, he laughed and said, "most tourists to Tijuana feel the same way until they find out that my mother grew up on a ranch just outside Tijuana."

"So, your father was British?"

"No. You've probably met him -- he's on the board of Scribbles's magazine. My family lived in Boston, where I was born, until I was five, after which my parents spit. Mother went back to the ranch, and Father moved to London for ten years. I shuttled between the two until I was 18, after which I went to law school at Harvard. I'm a a lawyer now."

"And yet you're a tour guide today. Aren't you losing money by showing me around Tijuana?"

"I'm on vacation. I get to spend a day or two here in sunny, warm Honolulu, and then I can visit my mother and let her put you in a zonkey cart."

"What are zonkeys?"

"They are white donkeys that have had black zebra stripes painted on them, so they'll show up when they're photographed. Tijuana is famous for them, but hardly any tourists get to actually ride in the carts. You will actually ride."

The ranch turned out to be extensive. Dona Elvira, Juan's mother, was a delightful woman who showed me around. She pointed out a few decorations left over from Mexico's Day of the Dead [November 2], and introduced me to Leporello, the zonkey who pulled a modest wooden cart around the ranch. Field hands put whatever needed hauling into the cart.

Leporello seemed somewhat bored by his work. He barely batted an eye as I climbed into the cart with Dona Elvira for our ride around the place.

[Amy P]

I have been to Tijuana and have seen the Zonkies myself, lest anyone thinks you are making them up. Of course the locals all claim that they are a rare zebra - donkey mixed bread - most of them (the local owners) are quite skilled at hiding the shoe polish

Enjoying your adventures

F S

Thanks.

A White donkey crossed between zebra sounds like a great idea.

Someone could try it, but I'm not sure such a cross would be biologically possible.

No more difficult than a mule or a hinny (Or ligers and tigons, but we'll stick with the equines...) Most often sterile, of course http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zebroid

Oo, I didn't know about some of these... http://www.rantpets.com/2015/06/03/15-strangest-hybrid-animal-breeds-you-didnt-know-existed/

Thanks for the links, Amy.

The beefalo is fairly common. The Tion and Liger were animals I had heard of. I didn't realize that the Zonkey was a real animal, not just a white donkey with shoe-polish strips.